Talk:Gilberto Lerma Plata/GA1

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.'' Criterion 1
 * On several occasions, there is an unnecessary comma before the dependent clause marker "when."
 * In several places, it appears that you have an unnecessary comma in a compound predicate.
 * A comma is due after "extortion" in "kidnappings, human smuggling, oil theft, extortion and piracy" to offset each item in the list.--Theroyalrambler (talk) 08:47, 6 January 2020 (UTC)
 * ✅ Thank you for the review. I've believed I've addressed your Critera 1 concerns. Please let me know if there are any commas you deem unnecessary. MX (  ✉  •  ✎  ) 17:41, 6 January 2020 (UTC)

Note: I see no other grammatical or mechanical mistakes.--Theroyalrambler (talk) 22:40, 7 January 2020 (UTC) Reviewer: Theroyalrambler (talk · contribs) 04:24, 5 January 2020 (UTC)
 * It appears that you have an unnecessary comma in a compound object in the sentence "The indictment stated that Lerma Plata helped procure weapons for the cartel to facilitate their drug operations, and that he was involved in money laundering." Consider removing it.
 * It appears that you have an unnecessary comma in a compound predicate in the sentence "... the witness had information about Flores Borrego's role in Lerma Plata's schemes, and confirmed that Flores Borrego worked under Lerma Plata by providing protection to the cartel as a policeman Consider removing it." Likewise in the sentnece "He was crossing to the U.S. to visit his family in the Rio Grande Valley on Good Friday, but was arrested after a U.S. official ran his information in their database and was notified that he was wanted by the D.D.C."
 * It appears that you are missing a comma after "Washington" in "... transferred to Washington D.C., where he..."
 * It appears that the indefinite pronoun "each" does not agree with the verb "were" in the sentence "... U.S. authorities stated that this meant that each of the crimes were concurrent.."
 * ✅ Yikes. Seems like my comma game isn't too strong. Thank you for pointing these out. I will keep an eye on them for my other articles. Thank you for the review. MX (  ✉  •  ✎  ) 17:08, 8 January 2020 (UTC)

Note: After a more thorough examination, I found more issues after all, which I list above in full. Theroyalrambler (talk) 10:10, 11 January 2020 (UTC)
 * It appears that you have an unnecessary comma in a compound predicate after "Texas" in "... Mexico border to visit family members in Texas, and was arrested by..."
 * A knowledgeable audience may have difficulty reading this sentence: "An identity and bond hearing session was planned to be held on 12 April in McAllen, a common practice in federal court cases, but Lerma Plata's Brownsville-based attorney Noe Garza Jr. waived the identity session." Consider using simpler words, shortening the sentence, or breaking it into two.
 * A knowledgeable audience may have difficulty reading this sentence: "This amount was finalized after the prosecution proved that this was the gross profit amount the Gulf Cartel made in sales between 2006 and 2011 when it smuggled roughly 1,400,000 kg (3,100,000 lb) of cocaine and 8,000 metric tons of marijuana from Mexico to the U.S. Raman reiterated in the sentencing announcement that Lerma Plata used his police duties against the public good and to further his own interests." Consider removing any unnecessary words; and splitting it into two sentences.
 * "Given a credit" should be "given credit"--without the article.
 * A knowledgeable audience might find this sentence hard to read: "The federal sentencing guidelines were changed in the U.S. after his conviction, so his defense used that to argue that Lerma Plata was eligible for a new range (since his offense fell under the 121 and 151 months in the new revision)." Consider using simpler words, shortening the sentence, or breaking it into two.
 * You use abbreviations both with and without periods (e.g., "US" and "U.S."; "PRI"; "PGR"; "D.D.C."; &c.) Both styles are acceptable, but it is better to use one style throughout the article.
 * In the footnotes, a comma is due after "Tamaulipas" to offset the name in "... Ciudad Victoria, Tamaulipas in 2010."
 * In the footnotes, a comma is due after "Texas" in "Brownsville, Texas resident" to offset the state.

Criterion 2: Verifiable with no original research

The article contains a list of all references (sources of information), presented in accordance with the layout style guideline; inline citations are from reliable sources; it contains no original research; it contains no copyright violations nor plagiarism. Thus the article passes this criterion.--Theroyalrambler (talk) 09:49, 11 January 2020 (UTC)

Criterion 3: Broad in its coverage: It addresses the main aspects of the topic; and it stays focused on the topic without going into unnecessary detail. Thus it meets this criterion.

Criterion 4: Neutral: It represents viewpoints fairly and without editorial bias, giving due weight to each. Thus it meets this criterion.

Criterion 5: stable: It does not change significantly from day to day because of an ongoing edit war or content dispute. Thus it meets this criterion.

Criterion 6: Illustrated, if possible, by media such as images, video, or audio: Media are tagged with their copyright statuses, and valid fair use rationales are provided for non-free content; and media are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions. Thus it meets this criterion.

The article meets all the above criteria needed for approval, which I thus grant.--Theroyalrambler (talk) 06:09, 13 January 2020 (UTC)