Talk:Hansjörg Wyss/Archive 1

Removal of sourced text by ZuluKooi without consensus
Rditor @ZuluKooi, whose sole edits are almost identical deletions of large amounts of sourced text from the John Podesta and Wyss articles, citing "editorializing". However this is what Wikipedia says about "editorializing": ''The advice in this guideline is not limited to the examples provided and should not be applied rigidly... What matters is that articles should be well-written and consistent with the core content policies — Neutral point of view, No original research, and Verifiability. The guideline does not apply to quotations, which should be faithfully reproduced from the original sources; see the section on quotations in the main Manual of Style.'' I submit there is nothing deficient or contrary to MOS, BLP, etc in the text to merit its removal. Any constructive and objective opinions will be appreciated. Quis separabit? 03:50, 13 March 2015 (UTC)

Simple fixes for this article
Hello, I'd like to introduce myself to anyone watching this page: I'm working for The Wyss Foundation (the organization founded by Mr. Wyss) to look for ways to improve this article. Since I have a conflict of interest here, I won't be making any edits, just suggestions on the Talk page.

The first thing I noticed about this article are a few "citation needed" tags and dead links. I've gone ahead and found sources to use in each of these instances. Would another editor be able to add them to the article? Below I've put together the new sources to add in where information has been tagged as "citation needed":


 * The Early career section has no references, so here is the entire paragraph updated with sources. I had to edit the wording a little based on what I could support with sources, but only minor details have been changed.


 * Wyss was born in Bern, Switzerland. After receiving a Master of Science degree in Civil and Structural Engineering from the Swiss Federal Institute of Technology Zurich in 1959, Wyss earned an MBA from the Harvard University Graduate School of Business in 1965. Following that, he worked in various positions in the textile industry, including plant engineer and project manager for Chrysler in Pakistan, Turkey, and the Philippines.


 * Here's the source for the second "citation needed" tag on the last sentence of the article:
 * In 2014, Wyss donated $120 million to the Swiss Federal Institute of Technology Zurich and the University of Zurich for the new Wyss Translational Center Zurich.

There are quite a few dead links, I've numbered them as they appear in the references, with an updated link or source that can replace it. I left out a few where I think the material itself should be updated, but I'm planning on discussing those on the Talk page in the future. Here are the new links where those can be updated and also some citations that can be removed due to redundancy:


 * 1. Laudatio, Honorary Doctorate of the Faculty of Medicine, University of Basel; retrieved 27 April 2011.
 * New source:


 * 3. Wilkinson, Tara Loader. Switzerland's second richest man makes big donation to Harvard, Wealth Bulletin, 8 October 2008; retrieved 15 October 2008.
 * Updated link: http://www.efinancialnews.com/story/2008-10-08/switzerlands-second-richest-man-makes-big-donation-to-harvard


 * 6. Save the planet? Buy it, The Daily Telegraph; retrieved 15 October 2008.
 * This is redundant in both places it is used and can be removed


 * 15. Hansjörg Wyss, MBA 1965, Harvard Business School; retrieved 15 October 2008.
 * This citation is redundant and can be removed


 * 16. Zobel gets highest alumni award from Harvard, Philippine Daily Inquirer; retrieved 15 October 2008.
 * Updated link: http://business.inquirer.net/money/features/view/20070930-91654/Zobel_gets_highest_alumni_award_from_Harvard


 * 17. $125 million gift is Harvard's largest, northjersey.com; retrieved 15 October 2008.
 * This citation is redundant and can be removed


 * 19. "Harvard gets largest ever donation from an individual: $125-million", theglobeandmail.com; retrieved 15 October 2008.
 * This citation is redundant and can be removed


 * 20. Chinlund, Christine. Harvard gets $125 million for biological engineering institute, The Boston Globe; retrieved 15 October 2008.
 * This citation is redundant and can be removed


 * 22. Alum gives Harvard $125M for bioengineering center, washingtonpost.com; retrieved 15 October 2008.
 * This citation is redundant and can be removed


 * 23. Alum gives largest individual gift in Harvard's history: $125M for bioengineering institute, dailypress.com; retrieved 15 October 2008.
 * This citation is redundant and can be removed

Finally, in addition to the citation fixes, I was hoping editors would help with another bit of article maintenance: the infobox photo. The current image is old and isn't of great quality. The Wyss Foundation has released a current headshot that has now been uploaded to Commons. The file is here. Could someone replace the old photo with this one? Thanks! Heatherer (talk) 18:21, 30 June 2015 (UTC)
 * These edits have been made. Thanks so much to for working through all of the changes! Heatherer (talk) 19:26, 6 July 2015 (UTC)

Changes to the Early career section
Hi again. Last month I proposed some updates to the sourcing of the article. Since that time, I've completed additional research on Mr. Wyss and have several more substantial changes to suggest. I'd like to focus on the shortest and most straightforward of these changes first, in the Early career section. I was able to flesh out Wyss' early life and career trajectory with details I discovered in available sources. This new information only amounts to a few extra sentences, but I thought it would be easiest for editors to review the section in its entirety with these additions, so I've uploaded a draft to my userspace here:


 * User:Heatherer/Hansjorg Wyss Early life and career

To be clear, I didn't remove or even rewrite anything currently in the section, just added to it. You'll see that I've also renamed the section to Early life and career to reflect the new content. I'd like to hear what other editors think about these additions. As I mentioned before, I will not be making any edits to the article myself due to a conflict of interest. If it seems like this new information would be an improvement for the entry, I'd ask that the draft be moved to the live article. Thanks! Heatherer (talk) 22:29, 22 July 2015 (UTC)
 * On your user page, User:Heatherer, you state that "I have a conflict of interest or vested interest". Could you please be more specific on your user page, and not just on this talkpage? Edwardx (talk) 22:53, 22 July 2015 (UTC)
 * Hi . My specific COI varies—I work with multiple clients through a consulting firm, always disclosing my COI on the relevant article Talk pages. I've stated that more clearly on my user page. If you have any questions about my COI in this case, I'm happy to answer them. Thanks! Heatherer (talk) 13:51, 23 July 2015 (UTC)
 * I've checked over the new text and added it to the article. Sorry for the long wait! Antony–22 (talk⁄contribs) 01:43, 12 August 2015 (UTC)
 * No apology needed! Thanks for your help. Heatherer (talk) 16:38, 12 August 2015 (UTC)

New Personal life section
Hello! I noticed that the Environmental protection section contains unrelated information (specifically the third paragraph that deals with property and financial rankings), so I devised a new section called Personal life that I think might be a better place to put those details—as well as a good heading to organize some other particulars I found about his family and non-work activities. Here's the link to the draft I prepared in my userspace:


 * User:Heatherer/Hansjorg Wyss Personal life

Would other editors look it over and let me know what they think? Does it make sense to create this new section and remove the information about Halter Ranch and his current rankings out of the Environmental protection section? As I mentioned previously, I would prefer not to edit the article myself, because I have a COI. So, if the changes I'm suggesting seem good, I'd appreciate it if another editor could make them. In the meantime, I'm open to any suggestions or feedback. Thanks! Heatherer (talk) 19:42, 2 September 2015 (UTC)
 * Closing this request. Thank you to for reviewing and making the changes after seeing my note on WikiProject Environment. Heatherer (talk) 16:14, 2 October 2015 (UTC)

Proposing Philanthropy section
Hi all! As the above request has just been completed, I wanted to share a new draft I prepared for the Environmental protection section of the article. In addition to making some changes to the content, I'm suggesting that Environmental protection be made a subsection under a new Philanthropy heading which will summarize all of Wyss' philanthropic activities. I think the Support of scientific research section that's currently in the article also fits under this heading. The full draft is here for editors to review, but I did want to briefly discuss the edits I'm proposing.


 * I added the following:
 * An overview on Wyss' philanthropic giving, including how much he has given and the causes he donates to
 * Background on Wyss' interest in conservation
 * Personal donations Wyss has made
 * An award Wyss won in 2011 from the Wilderness Society
 * I updated the boards Wyss serves on
 * I removed anything not related to land and wildlife conservation (this has been rehomed in the new Personal life section)
 * I rewrote and condensed the third and fourth paragraphs. These mostly focus on John Podesta and have very little to do with Wyss. After looking closely at the source, I'm not even sure it's worth mentioning at all. I left it in for now, but I'd like editors to consider whether it needs to be included. The claims are just the unsubstantiated opinion of one article, which is fairly sensational (the article characterizes Wyss as a "shadowy foreign billionaire").

I realize that it can be tricky to stay neutral when writing about topics like philanthropy, so I'm prepared to make edits where others feel it is necessary. Wyss is very notable in this area, however, so I think it's fair to devote a significant portion of the article to discussing it. As noted previously, I am working as a paid consultant on behalf of The Wyss Foundation, so I will not be making any edits myself to the live article. I'm looking forward to reading others' thoughts. Thanks! Heatherer (talk) 16:10, 2 October 2015 (UTC)


 * Thanks to for making these changes following a brief discussion here. Thanks! Heatherer (talk) 18:16, 9 October 2015 (UTC)

Proposing updated Synthes USA section
Hi all. I have a new section draft for editors to review focusing on the Synthes USA section. I'd appreciate it if others could take a look and let me know what they think. Since I have a COI, I will not replace the section myself.

Drafting this section, I had two goals: expanding information about Wyss' career at Synthes, and ensuring the information about his involvement with Norian XR is neutral, in particular, removing biased word choices such as "escaped indictment".
 * User:Heatherer/Hansjorg_Wyss_Synthes

Unfortunately, I wasn't able to find much more in sources about Wyss' career, but I did add a few new details. The major changes are in the material related to the 2009 indictment. I based the new wording on a New York Times article about the incident and a Philadelphia Inquirer article I'm assuming the original editor was referencing (the current version only has one citation, which doesn't mention any of the information in the paragraph).

I also significantly reduced this paragraph because Wyss is not actually mentioned by name in the indictment and he was never charged with wrongdoing; WP:BLP guidelines about sourcing indicate that the source should be especially strong when including controversial material. As well, the matter is discussed at length in the Synthes article that's linked from Wyss' article. Ideally, I think the statement should be removed entirely, but I'll let other editors decide.

As always, I invite others to review this new draft carefully for any problems and welcome feedback. Thanks! Heatherer (talk) 21:26, 13 October 2015 (UTC)


 * Adding one additional request to this message: I noticed Cite errors with several of the references (it seems to be a result of my piecemeal drafts—sorry!). Would someone be able to make these fixes?
 * Change the reference in the Alma mater field in the infobox to
 * Change the reference after "He was raised in an apartment with two sisters" in the Early life and career section to
 * Change the reference after "Between 2004 and 2008, Businessweek estimated that Wyss personally donated nearly USD$277 million" in the Philanthropy section to
 * Change the second reference after "but he also frequently contributes to historic projects and European museums" in the Philanthropy section to
 * Change the first paragraph of the Personal life section to " Wyss is an active hiker, skier and backpacker. He is also a hobby pilot. "
 * Change the name of the reference following "Wyss lives in Wyoming" in the Personal life section to "Forbes15" rather than "Bloomberg15"
 * I think that should cover everything. I double-checked the new Synthes USA draft I'm proposing and it should not create further issues. Thanks Heatherer (talk) 21:26, 13 October 2015 (UTC)


 * Heatherer, I attempted to incorporate the six new changes into the article, but when I previewed the revised article, I saw one citation error remaining. Also, I am not sure that your fifth point is intended to reduce the entire paragraph to two short sentences with references. Therefore, I suggest that you make a new user subpage with the entire article as you wish it to be, except for the default sort category and the 10 ordinary categories, because article categories should not be used in user space. Then I or another editor can highlight the wikicode of the revised version, copy the highlighted wikicode, open the edit page of the article, highlight the wikicode of the article (except the default sort category and the 10 ordinary categories), and paste the wikicode copied from your user space.
 * —Wavelength (talk) 18:32, 15 October 2015 (UTC)
 * Sounds good. I'll get right on uploading the full draft to my user space. Should I include the new text for the Synthes USA section too, or should I leave it out so you or other editors can review separately? Thanks! Heatherer (talk) 19:48, 15 October 2015 (UTC)
 * Please include that section also.—Wavelength (talk) 19:51, 15 October 2015 (UTC)
 * The draft with all the corrections made is here. Thanks again for your help and sorry my initial request was confusing. Your idea was a much simpler way of showing the changes! I should note that this draft includes The Wyss Foundation in external links, which is my last requested change for the article. Feel free to leave it out if you don't believe it belongs. Thanks!Heatherer (talk) 21:04, 15 October 2015 (UTC)
 * I have revised the article according to your latest request.
 * —Wavelength (talk) 23:23, 15 October 2015 (UTC)
 * Thank you! The article looks great. I am now closing this request. Heatherer (talk) 20:27, 19 October 2015 (UTC)

Opening this section back up, because we haven't reached consensus. Yesterday,  the second paragraph of the Synthes USA section to what was previously there. I've invited him to join this discussion so we can work on wording that everyone can agree on, but that also follows guidelines. Thanks! Heatherer (talk) 14:21, 21 October 2015 (UTC)


 * Thanks for the invitation. I am leery of any attempts at sanitizing facts but I am open to suggestions about rewording. Quis separabit?  14:24, 21 October 2015 (UTC)


 * I just reviewed the changes you made to the section—thanks for adding a source and removing the more biased language. I'm not sure "Federal prosecutors named Wyss as 'Person Number 7' in the criminal conspiracy" accurately reflects the source though. Wyss was never named, though it was stated that Person 7 was "CEO and major shareholder" of the company, which implies this was Wyss. In either case, he was never convicted or even indicted. The reason this distinction is important, is because this article is a biography of a living person and those guidelines state "editors must seriously consider not including material in any article suggesting that the person has committed, or is accused of committing, a crime unless a conviction is secured".


 * This is also the reason I suggested reducing the paragraph. Very little of this information has to do with Wyss personally and is covered in depth in the Synthes article. My intention is not to sanitize facts, but to include information that is accurate and appropriate within the BLP guidelines. That said, I am not an expert on BLP rules around this kind of legal material, so I've invited editors from BLP/N to take a look and weigh in as well. Thanks! Heatherer (talk) 18:54, 22 October 2015 (UTC)


 * As this conversation has come to a standstill, I've listed it on WP:3O. Thanks! Heatherer (talk) 18:33, 10 November 2015 (UTC)

Third Opinion
A third opinion has been requested. On the one hand, because of the extensive exchange, it is hard to say what the question is. However, I see the names of three editors in this discussion, so that this is not within the scope of third opinion. I will be closing the third opinion request, but I suggest that the discussions of this article be brought to the dispute resolution noticeboard for moderated discussion. Robert McClenon (talk) 19:33, 10 November 2015 (UTC)


 * Thanks for taking a look and responding, ! I apologize for the confusion, but there are just two individuals involved in this current discussion. The other editor reviewed the original request but has not been involved in this discussion, which began on October 21 (where the first outdent is). The main question is: how much detail should this article include about the Synthes indictment? Do you think you might reconsider closing the request? Thanks! Heatherer (talk)


 * In my opinion, there is more information in the article about the investigation than should be in the BLP, since he was never indicted or convicted. Robert McClenon (talk) 22:50, 10 November 2015 (UTC)


 * Thanks, ! As part of the process, would you be able to make the edits that are necessary? Could you trim the section back to what you feel is appropriate? If it helps, this was (that I had proposed) and  before that. Thanks! Heatherer (talk)

Would another editor be able to implement changes proposed by Robert McClenon in the above conversation? As an editor with a conflict of interest, I do not wish to make the edits myself. Thanks! Heatherer (talk) 22:08, 4 December 2015 (UTC)

Reverted Edits about Allegations of Sexual Harassment
Hi everyone, Earlier today I included edits with sources indicating sexual harassment by Hansjörg Wyss against a former female employee. My edits were later reverted with the reason "misrepresented sources". I really don't think I did and that the sources were accurate and stating what I stated in my edits (if not, then I am more than ready to apologize). I would be glad if the community could have a look at the edits, I hereby attach them beneath:

In 2015, allegations of sexual harassment by Hansjörg Wyss towards a former female employee became public. The allegations turned into a particularly piquant public issue when it came to light that Hillary Clinton had accepted a donation of $5 million from Hansjörg Wyss although she had known in advance about the allegations of sexual harassment. In an attempt to silence and end the affair, Hansjörg Wyss declared, according to The DailyCaller, that he "wants authorities to imprison an American woman for speaking publicly about allegations of sexual abuse at his hands".

Thanks for your suggestions and your statements. BankerStar (talk) 20:36, 25 December 2015 (UTC)


 * We have to be extra-careful about biographies of living persons. In this case, the text did not reflect what the cited sources say, for example omitting the context that the terms of an earlier settlement were allegedly violated. The second sentence was written to obscure the fact that the donation was to the Clinton Foundation, not her presidential campaign, and the cited sources don't precisely support that she knew about the allegations when the donation was made.  The final sentence is ambiguous about whether the quote comes from Wyss&mdash;it actually comes from the article itself. Some of the sources themselves are political blogs with obvious POVs, which might not be considered reliable sources. I've fixed the worst of the problems, but this still needs further scrutiny from someone who has experience with BLPs. Antony–22 (talk⁄contribs) 23:01, 25 December 2015 (UTC)


 * @Antony-22: Thanks for your reply. I can clearly see and understand your points but I would have appreciated if you had engaged in discussion before reverting my edits and before changing them again. Nevertheless, after having read your altered version of my edits, my personal impression is that you seem to attempt to credit the accused billionaire and discredit the (supposedly sexually harassed) female employee. However, I cannot prove this and for me, personally, your version is acceptable as the main message is clearly visible. If someone else in the community thinks it is not acceptable then they will change the edits again. So, I can live with the version which is online now and wish you a nice day.BankerStar (talk) 11:00, 26 December 2015 (UTC)


 * Our rules on biographies of living persons specifically state that "Contentious material about living persons that is unsourced or poorly sourced... should be removed immediately and without waiting for discussion", emphasis in original. My edits have only made the text consistent with what the cited sources actually say; I'm sure this will receive further scrutiny from others with more experience with BLPs. Antony–22 (talk⁄contribs) 02:52, 27 December 2015 (UTC)


 * Er, who defines "Contentious material" and who defines "unsourced or poorly sourced [text]"? Just asking, your edits do seem reasonable. I would have made them myself but I hate snake pit articles. Too stressful. Yours,  Quis separabit?  04:49, 27 December 2015 (UTC)

Hi there, I'm a colleague of Heatherer who has posted here before to make suggestions and requests on behalf of The Wyss Foundation. Like her I have a financial conflict of interest as my firm is working for the Foundation and I will not make any edits to this article. I just wanted to note that I've left a request at WP:BLPN for editors there to take a look at this. As Antony-22 has noted, is best for editors to weigh in who are knowledgeable about situations like this and how to apply the BLP guidelines, so I hope that editors from BLPN will be able clarify how best this information should be treated. 16912 Rhiannon (Talk · COI) 21:08, 30 December 2015 (UTC)


 * Looks like the BLPN thread got archived without a response. I think it might have escaped notice given the holiday, so perhaps it should be re-posted. Antony–22 (talk⁄contribs) 07:24, 5 January 2016 (UTC)


 * I removed the entire "controversy" section. If it ever gets beyond the point of one person making an allegation, e.g. if he is ever indicted or several women come forward, this might be reconsidered, especially if better sources report it.  Smallbones( smalltalk ) 05:33, 7 January 2016 (UTC)


 * Thanks, ! Your reasoning makes sense to me. I appreciate you looking this over and making that change. Heatherer (talk) 20:03, 7 January 2016 (UTC)

Sorry, folks, but I did some more research and found a newspaper article stating that SEVERAL female employees AS WELL AS his ex-wife put forward allegations of sexual harassment by Wyss towards them. See here the source: http://www.20min.ch/schweiz/bern/story/25893853

It's in German; however it clearly states employees and 20 Minutes is a big newspaper company; see here the English Wikipedia article: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/20_Minuten

I will not restore the controversy section myself but let you and the community decide upon further action.BankerStar (talk) 10:33, 8 January 2016 (UTC)


 * According to the article, that source is a free newspaper given to commuters, which hardly gives us confidence that it is a reliable source. Antony–22 (talk⁄contribs) 20:28, 9 January 2016 (UTC)
 * I agree with that the source doesn't seem particularly reputable. In addition, I translated the article and found that it uses the The Daily Caller as its source and simply summarizes what their article said. There doesn't seem to be any independent reporting or verification by 20 Minuten. Thanks, Heatherer (talk) 02:31, 15 January 2016 (UTC)

Swiss or Swiss-American?
In this edit I changed Swiss to Swiss-American. The edit was reverted with a comment 'rv; any evidence he is a US citizen??'. I have no such evidence, but the majority of the article is about US-based activities and his current residence are listed as being American. I see this being in line with WP:OPENPARA. Thoughts? Stuartyeates (talk) 02:41, 6 January 2016 (UTC)


 * On the contrary, as a multibillionaire expatriate activist and political operator, Wyss's nationality is quite important, in the same way as Rupert Murdoch and George Soros. Quis separabit?  02:59, 6 January 2016 (UTC)


 * Exactly. Currently the lede gives no hint that he's ever set foot out of the country of his birth, let alone qualifies as an expatriate. It needs to include this information. Stuartyeates (talk) 19:36, 6 January 2016 (UTC)


 * This discussion seems to have stalled, so I wanted to chime in here. Wyss is a U.S. resident, but a Swiss citizen, so I'm not sure Swiss-American is the appropriate term. That said, I completely agree the intro should note the fact that Wyss lives in the United States and mention some of his activities in the country. Perhaps something along the lines of "He was the CEO of Synthes USA, the U.S. division of Switzerland-based company Synthes"? If that's still not clear enough, the intro could also note he lives in Wyoming or that he is a philanthropist interested in preserving the American west. Thoughts on any of those options? Heatherer (talk) 02:41, 15 January 2016 (UTC)
 * I today's world of remote-working, there is no necessary correlation between where someone lives and where the company they lead is based. Does incorporation in Delaware (like huge numbers of US companies) mean moving to Delaware? I think not. Stuartyeates (talk) 20:59, 19 January 2016 (UTC)

Revisiting the Synthes USA section
I'm starting a fresh section here to revisit the topic above, because the dispute about the content of the Synthes USA section is still unresolved. If you're new to the discussion, here's a summary of what has happened:


 * Back in October, I worked with another editor on changes to the Synthes USA section based on a draft I wrote.
 * My draft reduced information about an indictment Wyss' company was involved in (here's what the article originally said), since Wyss was not named in the indictment and was never charged with wrongdoing.
 * The editor who initially reviewed it agreed with my changes and updated the entry.
 * Later, an editor who had not been involved in the Talk page discussion, reverted some of the changes and added in more information about the indictment.
 * After the conversation with that editor stalled, I then went through the Third Opinion process and an editor concluded that the text shouldn't be so detailed. However, they declined to make any edits.

Since then, I have had difficulty finding anyone to help make the changes. I will not make them myself because of my financial conflict of interest. Would any of the editors recently active on this page or others be willing to make edits to this section as they see fit? Thanks! Heatherer (talk) 19:47, 3 February 2016 (UTC)


 * As a neutral editor, I implemented the request after reading the complete discussions on this talk page. I am in agreement with the 3rd Opinion, due weight needs to be observed for a BLP.  I added a main article tag to the section, as the controversy regarding Wyss and Synthes is clearly and sufficiently addressed in the article  Synthes.  Cheers Gmcbjames (talk) 00:13, 4 March 2016 (UTC)

Article updates
Hello! I'm here on behalf of The Wyss Foundation as part of my work with Beutler Ink to suggest some updates to the article based on recent news coverage. The sections that can be updated are Philanthropy, Environmental protection, and Personal life. To make it easier for editors to review, I'm put the new material in my user space. You can see how it differs in content from the current article.

To briefly summarize the changes:
 * Added donations to policy organizations
 * Added charitable commitment to African Parks
 * Added donation to Land for Public Trust
 * Added details about Halter Ranch
 * Updated Wyss' rankings

I don't think I am suggesting any controversial changes and I've aimed to write material that follows Wikipedia guidelines. However, because of my financial COI, I will not make any edits to the article myself. Instead, I'd appreciate if other editors could review my work and give feedback. If my suggestions look to be an improvement, I'd love help moving the new material over to the live article. Thanks! Heatherer (talk) 14:15, 27 April 2017 (UTC)


 * Hi there, all! I'll be stepping in here to continue looking for help with this request, in place of my now-former colleague Heatherer. I've posted here before, but to clarify: my firm Beutler Ink is working for The Wyss Foundation and I am here on their behalf, so I do have a financial conflict of interest and will not make any edits myself. Would any editors who've discussed updates to this page previously be interested to look at this one? Pinging: Antony-22, Gmcbjames, Stuartyeates and Smallbones. Thanks in advance! 16912 Rhiannon (Talk &middot; COI) 20:43, 18 May 2017 (UTC)


 * 16912 Rhiannon, Heatherer's edits have been reviewed and added. I did not find the edits controversial.  The edits fall within policy.  Do review my edit. I would recommend a rewrite of the lede section to reflect a summary of the article's text body using MOS guidelines WP:Lead.  If you rewrite the lede, I can add it to the article for you, just ping me. Cheers Gmcbjames (talk) 18:04, 19 May 2017 (UTC)
 * Thanks so so much, Gmcbjames! And apologies for the slow response here, I was thinking about what to do with the introduction. Given the article isn't a very long one, I'm working on a short draft version and look forward to sharing it with you soon. Thanks again! 16912 Rhiannon (Talk &middot; COI) 03:09, 13 June 2017 (UTC)


 * 16912 Rhiannon, once you have a rewrite of the lede (intro) ping me. Cheers Gmcbjames (talk) 00:27, 14 June 2017 (UTC)