Talk:Harajuku Lovers Tour/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Status (talk · contribs) 03:45, 15 July 2012 (UTC)

Lead

 * The Harajuku Lovers Tour was the first solo concert tour of American recording artist Gwen Stefani, which began in October 2005 in support of her debut studio album Love. Angel. Music. Baby. (2004). --> The Harajuku Lovers Tour was the first solo concert tour of American recording artist Gwen Stefani. The tour began ran through October to November 2005, to support her debut studio album Love. Angel. Music. Baby. (2004).
 * Although Stefani embarked on multiple tours with her band No Doubt, she initially opt not to participate in a tour to promote her album, an attitude that the singer eventually abandoned due to the commercial success of Love. Angel. Music. Baby.. --> Although Stefani embarked on multiple tours with her band No Doubt, she initially opt not to participate in a tour to promote her album; an attitude that the singer eventually abandoned due to the commercial success of Love. Angel. Music. Baby.. --> Also feels like a word is missing between here "she initially opt not to participate".
 * ❌ The sentence is correct as it is.
 * It was first announced on June 27, 2005. --> Not important to the lead.
 * brought in --> Very odd choice of wording.
 * ✅ Replaced it with recruited.
 * such as the musical material --> such as its musical material
 * ✅ I removed it.
 * A video album sponsoring --> How does a video album sponsor a tour?
 * ✅ Removed.
 * Having been released in DVD format in conjunction with her 2006 album The Sweet Escape, the album went on to acquire gold and platinum certifications from the Australian Recording Industry Association and the Canadian Recording Industry Association, respectively. --> The information of how it sold is irrelevant to this article.
 * ✅ Removed.
 * Having been released in DVD format in conjunction with her 2006 album The Sweet Escape, the album went on to acquire gold and platinum certifications from the Australian Recording Industry Association and the Canadian Recording Industry Association, respectively. --> The information of how it sold is irrelevant to this article.
 * ✅ Removed.

Broadcast and recordings

 * Should be more specific about what concert was done. Not just "in late November 2005"
 * ❌ It doesn't specify which concerts were filmed.
 * Also, Stefani, not Gwen Stefani

Set list

 * Source for this information?

Overall

 * Overall, the article is pretty well done.
 * Do you think any more pictures from the tour should be squeezed into the article?
 * I added a picture in the Broadcast and recordings section.

I believed I have addressed all of the issues. :) —DAP388 (talk) 03:09, 17 July 2012 (UTC)


 * All issues have been addressed. I am passing the article! Great work! Sorry for the wait; I don't know if you checked my talk page or not, but I had surgery on the 17th and I have been recovering. Statυs  (talk) 03:08, 20 July 2012 (UTC)