Talk:Harold Edward Elliott/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Peacemaker67 (talk · contribs) 10:41, 10 April 2017 (UTC)

This article is in good shape. A few comments: Lead Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 10:55, 10 April 2017 (UTC)
 * link subaltern, second lieutenant and major general
 * ✅ Done, except that major general is already linked in the first sentence. Hawkeye7 (talk) 11:52, 10 April 2017 (UTC)
 * First Australian Imperial Force should probably just be Australian Imperial Force, that was what it was called and he didn't live to see the 2nd
 * ✅ True, but oddly enough the term "First AIF" was indeed used in 1914. Hawkeye7 (talk) 11:52, 10 April 2017 (UTC)
 * "as a candidate as a..." should probably be "as a candidate for the... in the Senate"
 * ✅ Done. Hawkeye7 (talk) 11:52, 10 April 2017 (UTC)
 * Victorian Police strike should either be Victoria Police strike or Victorian police strike. Victoria Police has always been the proper name. I know, the article is incorrectly titled.
 * ✅ Very well. Hawkeye7 (talk) 11:52, 10 April 2017 (UTC)
 * Special Constables should be in initial lower case, also link
 * ✅ Done. Didn't know there was an article. Hawkeye7 (talk) 11:52, 10 April 2017 (UTC)
 * should probably mention he suffered from mental illness and took his own life
 * ✅ Done. Hawkeye7 (talk) 11:52, 10 April 2017 (UTC)

Early life Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 03:09, 11 April 2017 (UTC)
 * Harold Edward "Pompey" Elliott is a bit incongruous, as he wasn't called that until later. I'd introduce the nickname at the appropriate chronological point.
 * ✅ Done. Hawkeye7 (talk) 03:57, 11 April 2017 (UTC)
 * "the farms acquired outright" there is only mention of the family farm, were there others?
 * ✅ Yes, there were multiple properties. Hawkeye7 (talk) 03:57, 11 April 2017 (UTC)
 * suggest putting Elsinore in quotes instead of in italics, then be consistent with the later named residences
 * ✅ Done. Hawkeye7 (talk) 03:57, 11 April 2017 (UTC)
 * suggest "Australian colonial governments"
 * ✅ Done. Hawkeye7 (talk) 03:57, 11 April 2017 (UTC)
 * link Other ranks (UK) and drop initial caps
 * ✅ Done. Hawkeye7 (talk) 03:57, 11 April 2017 (UTC)
 * "that of hie" should be "that of his"
 * ✅ Done. Hawkeye7 (talk) 03:57, 11 April 2017 (UTC)
 * link football to Australian rules football
 * Already linked. Hawkeye7 (talk) 03:57, 11 April 2017 (UTC)
 * down on Market Street seems a bit informal
 * ✅ Done. Hawkeye7 (talk) 03:57, 11 April 2017 (UTC)
 * suggest "since they would now"
 * ✅ Re-worded. Hawkeye7 (talk) 03:57, 11 April 2017 (UTC)

Gallipoli campaign
 * "taking particular care over the selection of officers" seems to be missing something. Maybe "with Elliott taking particular care over the selection of officers."?
 * ✅ Re-worded. Hawkeye7 (talk) 09:17, 11 April 2017 (UTC)
 * in the caption of the desert training pic, McNicol needs another L
 * ✅ Re-worded. Hawkeye7 (talk) 09:17, 11 April 2017 (UTC)
 * suggest replacing "He believed" with "Elliott believed", as we then go on to McCay's views
 * ✅ Done. Hawkeye7 (talk) 09:17, 11 April 2017 (UTC)
 * suggest splitting the sentence "loyalty from his men. He acquired the nickname..."
 * ✅ Done. Hawkeye7 (talk) 09:17, 11 April 2017 (UTC)
 * "the 7th Battalion moved into the positions at captured" needs a tweak
 * ✅ Tweaked. Hawkeye7 (talk) 09:17, 11 April 2017 (UTC)
 * the is an example of "the War", should probably be "the war"
 * ✅ Done. Hawkeye7 (talk) 09:17, 11 April 2017 (UTC)

Suez Canal
 * drop initial cap on Evacuation
 * ✅ Done. Hawkeye7 (talk) 12:10, 11 April 2017 (UTC)
 * suggest "he was appointed to command the 1st Infantry Brigade,[26] with the rank of brigadier general, vice Brigadier General Nevill Smyth, who was being promoted."
 * ✅ Done. Hawkeye7 (talk) 12:10, 11 April 2017 (UTC)

Western Front
 * British Expeditionary Forcestaff
 * ✅ Done. Hawkeye7 (talk) 12:10, 11 April 2017 (UTC)
 * drop caps on no man's land and link
 * ✅ Done. Hawkeye7 (talk) 12:10, 11 April 2017 (UTC)
 * "Elliott was made a" - was he given these awards for Fromelles? The way it is presented, it seems that way.
 * Yes. Hawkeye7 (talk) 12:10, 11 April 2017 (UTC)
 * What attack was this? "Ordered to make an attack that he didn't believe would succeed, he refused" It begs the question.
 * Flers. Added. Hawkeye7 (talk) 12:10, 11 April 2017 (UTC)
 * "the retreated to the Hindenburg Line" Germans?
 * Germans. Added. Hawkeye7 (talk) 12:10, 11 April 2017 (UTC)
 * you could drop 1917 from "end of September 1917"
 * ✅ Done. Hawkeye7 (talk) 12:10, 11 April 2017 (UTC)
 * "Elliot was mentioned in despatches." is missing a t.
 * ✅ Done. Hawkeye7 (talk) 12:10, 11 April 2017 (UTC)
 * for "its "altogether astonishing valiance""?
 * ✅ Done. Hawkeye7 (talk) 12:10, 11 April 2017 (UTC)
 * suggest "command of a division in favour of John"
 * ✅ Done. Hawkeye7 (talk) 12:10, 11 April 2017 (UTC)

Political service
 * "With considerable justice, Elliott that he was sidelined" needs a tweak
 * ✅ Done. Hawkeye7 (talk) 12:10, 11 April 2017 (UTC)

Death
 * "post traumatic stress disorder" and "major depressive disorder" don't need quotes
 * ✅ Removed. Hawkeye7 (talk) 12:10, 11 April 2017 (UTC)
 * the External link to Mallett's bio isn't working/timed out
 * ✅ Works for me. Hawkeye7 (talk) 12:10, 11 April 2017 (UTC)
 * the following need a US PD tag - File:Harold Pompey Elliott portrait.jpg, File:7th Battalion AIF arrives in Egypt.jpg, File:Pompey Elliott H15590.jpg, File:Elliott's horse Darkie.jpg, File:Pompey Elliott E02855.jpg
 * File:Pompey Elliott with Talbott Hobbs.jpg needs a PD-Aust tag as well as a PD US one
 * ✅ Done. Hawkeye7 (talk) 12:10, 11 April 2017 (UTC)

I'm done. Great work as usual. Cheers, Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 07:56, 11 April 2017 (UTC)
 * This article is well-written, verifiable using reliable sources, covers the subject well, is neutral and stable, and is illustrated by appropriately licensed images with appropriate captions. Passing. Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 00:18, 12 April 2017 (UTC)