Talk:He Siyuan/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: MX (talk · contribs) 19:29, 19 November 2018 (UTC)

Review
Review done. MX ( ✉  •  ✎  ) 21:56, 19 November 2018 (UTC)
 * Pinging you here per the message I left on your talkpage. MX ( ✉  •  ✎  ) 15:36, 30 November 2018 (UTC)

Lead paragraph

 * – The word "World War II" is mentioned here but not in the body. Per WP:LEADCITE, everything in the body has to be mentioned elsewhere. Perhaps not explicity, but I think we should mention "World War II" somewhere in the sections. I know the Surrender of Japan is part of WWII, but we can't expect our readers to know that. A simple mention should fix this.


 * Added World War II to article body. -Zanhe (talk) 10:07, 1 December 2018 (UTC)

Infobox

 * I'm a bit picky with unsourced info in the infobox. I noticed that you mention these people but don't provide a mention of them elsewhere in the body paragraphs: . Per WP:INFOBOXCITE, the information in the infobox has to be cited elsewhere in the body paragraphs.


 * I've found and added sources for three of the four people, but couldn't find a reliable online source for Xue Yue, so had to remove him for now. -Zanhe (talk) 10:07, 1 December 2018 (UTC)


 * – Infobox states he was part of the Revolutionary Committee of the Chinese Kuomintang, but that is not mentioned in the body. His daughter was, but that's all we got.


 * The Revolutionary Committee of the Chinese Kuomintang is the splinter party of Kuomintang that supported the Communists in the Civil War. It's not really necessary for the infobox, so I removed it. -Zanhe (talk) 10:07, 1 December 2018 (UTC)


 * – Just curious, but do we have the month so we can keep the same format as the rest of the dates? If not, no problem. We'll work with what we got...


 * Found a source that mentions the actual month, it's actually December 1944, after his meeting with Chiang Kai-shek in autumn. -Zanhe (talk) 10:07, 1 December 2018 (UTC)

Early life and education
– Is it italicized? It wasn't italicized in the previous mention (unless this is the name of the journal, which in that case is fine).


 * Yes, the Xinchao Society published a journal also called Xinchao.

Study abroad

 * – He → He Siyuan; you use "He Siyuan" in other mentions later so trying to keep this consistent.


 * Done. -Zanhe (talk) 10:07, 1 December 2018 (UTC)


 * – Weakness in what? Political weakness?


 * Added "political". -Zanhe (talk) 10:07, 1 December 2018 (UTC)


 * – Just out of curiosity, do sources mention her French name? I think it would be good to include it. This can help improve the article if someone is able to find sources on her / him during that time prior to the name change. You never know.


 * The Chinese sources only give a Chinese transcription of her name 宜文妮·詹姆斯, which sounds like Yveni James. But I can't reconstruct the original French name with certainty, so have to leave it out. -Zanhe (talk) 10:07, 1 December 2018 (UTC)

Academic and government career

 * – Would "Koumintang political party" instead of simply "Kuomintang" work? Or is it redundant? I had to click the article to know what the word was, and at that point you may lose a reader from finishing the article.


 * Added "Nationalist Party", another name of Kuomintang. -Zanhe (talk) 10:07, 1 December 2018 (UTC)


 * – He Siyuan


 * Done. -Zanhe (talk) 10:07, 1 December 2018 (UTC)

Military career during the Sino-Japanese War

 * – He Siyuan


 * – He Siyuan


 * Done. -Zanhe (talk) 10:07, 1 December 2018 (UTC)

Surrender of Beijing

 * – He Siyuan


 * – He Siyuan


 * Done. -Zanhe (talk) 10:07, 1 December 2018 (UTC)

People's Republic of China

 * I actually want to talk about the title of this section. Wouldn't "Death and legacy" be more accurate than just "People's Republic of China", which tells readers nothing about what's to come other than the founding of People's Republic of China.


 * Changed to "Later life and legacy". -Zanhe (talk) 10:07, 1 December 2018 (UTC)