Talk:Helen Elizabeth Nash

Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment
This article is or was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): Jstudentsa, Burrito757, SpeedyNoodle.

Above undated message substituted from Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment by PrimeBOT (talk) 22:16, 17 January 2022 (UTC)

Peer Review
Nice work acquiring so much information from a variety of verifiable sources. An encyclopedic tone is present throughout.

We recommend removing the subheadings in the Early Life section. The “Marriage” subheading is only one sentence long, which seems insufficient to constitute its own category. The “Death and Afterward” subheading belongs in the later “Awards, honors, and distinctions” section. Perhaps this section could be condensed into one block of text and retitled “Personal life” -- after all, a “Biography” should include information about education and career, which this section does not.

You could try to link to more articles in the “Awards, honors, and distinctions” section.

The article does not include a picture of an explanation of why there's no picture. If no pictures are available, you could always external link to images on a different website (source #5 would be great for this).

Another idea: perhaps you could add an Infobox for some quick information?

The Wikipedia Manual of Style states that page headings should only have the first word capitalized (e.g. “Education and Career” should be “Education and career”)

Grammatical edits:


 * "medical practiced" → should be “medical practice”
 * Six children info is repetitive in first and second paragraph in the Early Life section
 * "Their first child died when Homer was away at war and this made Marie a very protective mother." → switch to “which made Marie…”
 * "The baby had died of dehydration from gastroenteritis, a disease later cured by Hartmann's solution." → passive voice, just write “died”
 * "Funds for the education" → “the” is unnecessary
 * Every sentence starts with "she" in first paragraph of Education and Career
 * "1953 was a busy year for Nash" → this sentence is not neutral, should remove
 * “Nash often visited the Missouri Botanical Gardens during her internship as well” → irrelevant, we recommend removing this sentence (her patronage is implied later)
 * “Completeed” → completed spelled wrong in first paragraph of Education
 * Why is her pediatric ward internship at the end of Education and Career section? Appears to repeat earlier information
 * "Dr.Nash" and "St.Louis" in Awards section should have a space after the “.”
 * Nash vs. Dr. Nash → inconsistent use of both names, pick one to use throughout
 * "1953 was a busy year for Nash" → this sentence is not neutral, should remove
 * “Nash often visited the Missouri Botanical Gardens during her internship as well” → irrelevant, we recommend removing this sentence (her patronage is implied later)
 * “Completeed” → completed spelled wrong in first paragraph of Education
 * Why is her pediatric ward internship at the end of Education and Career section? Appears to repeat earlier information
 * "Dr.Nash" and "St.Louis" in Awards section should have a space after the “.”
 * Nash vs. Dr. Nash → inconsistent use of both names, pick one to use throughout
 * Why is her pediatric ward internship at the end of Education and Career section? Appears to repeat earlier information
 * "Dr.Nash" and "St.Louis" in Awards section should have a space after the “.”
 * Nash vs. Dr. Nash → inconsistent use of both names, pick one to use throughout
 * Nash vs. Dr. Nash → inconsistent use of both names, pick one to use throughout
 * Nash vs. Dr. Nash → inconsistent use of both names, pick one to use throughout

HuskyDawg (talk) 13:56, 29 November 2016 (UTC) Reviewed by HuskyDawg, Tahitihat, Wavemidnight