Talk:Herschel Walker/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Wasted Time R (talk · contribs) 14:29, 4 July 2021 (UTC)

I will be reviewing this nomination. Wasted Time R (talk) 14:29, 4 July 2021 (UTC)


 * GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)


 * 1) It is reasonably well written.
 * a (prose, spelling, and grammar): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
 * Regarding MoS conformance and article organization, the lede section is too short. For a subject like this, it should be at least two and probably three paragraphs, and include not just his football career but also his business career and political activities.    The "Track and field" section is not really suitable where it is, because it includes college activities under high school.  Maybe move to the "Sporting life outside football" section?  The "Training and diet" material should be earlier in the article, because otherwise Walker created Renaissance Man Food Services because he wanted to make good quality foods for his strict diet makes no sense. I think Walker getting a B.S. degree from the University of Georgia should be moved to the college sections, even if he got it later in life, since it is relevant to his business and political career.  "Reality televsion" does not merit being a top-level section of its own, but can be merged in with "Other athletic feats" and called "Other athletic and competitive activities" or something like that (maybe the training could go into it as well).  Regarding prose, I did not take a close look at it given the other issues with the article.
 * 1) It is factually accurate and verifiable.
 * a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources):  c (OR):  d (copyvio and plagiarism):
 * Regarding the reference section, most of the cites have the necessary information but some are lacking full publishing information (for example fns 55 and 56) and a few are bare urls (for example fn 57). Regarding citations to reliable sources, I see at least four 'citation needed' tags in the article, and for a submission to GAN there should not be any.  Moreover there are several paragraphs with little or no citations at all – the first paragraph in "High school career", the first paragraph in "College career", the first two paragraphs of "United States Football League", the first two paragraphs of "Dallas Cowboys (first stint)", the paragraphs in the "Philadelphia Eagles", "New York Giants", and "Dallas Cowboys (second stint)" sections, the second paragraph in "Football legacy", and so forth.  Many of these paragraphs make non-obvious statements of fact (the best rushing game by a Viking back since 1983) or interpretation (but soon discovered that Walker wasn't elusive enough for the role. He couldn't play fullback either, because of limited blocking skills) and such material simply has to be cited. Regarding OR and copyvio, nothing jumped out at me but due to other issues with the article I didn't look closely.
 * 1) It is broad in its coverage.
 * a (major aspects): b (focused):
 * Regarding coverage of his football career, I think the article does a good job of that. However there needs to be more about the mess that was his signing by the USFL, where Walker seemed unable to decide and may have gotten trapped and ended up asking for public forgiveness – see this 1983 column in the New York Times for instance.  There also should be a follow-up on his 2011 interest in returning to the NFL (as in, no NFL team was interested).  A good deal more should be said about his sprinting career, in addition to relocating the section. In particular, he dueled with Carl Lewis at times, see for example this New York Times account from 1983. And per the NYT column about his USFL signing, he had aspirations of making the 1984 U.S. Olympics team as a sprinter.  More could be said about his Olympic bobsled participation - what got him interested in it, how well he performed compared to expectations, etc.  The MMA section needs some follow-up - he won two fights and then he stopped?  Why?  The Renaissance Man Food Services section could use a better explanation of what Walker's role in it has been.  Is he the hands-on active chief executive of it, or is he the public face of it while someone else actively runs it?  (Some businesses started by sports stars are the former, but many are the latter.)  Same information needed for Renaissance Drapery Manufacturing and H. Walker Enterprises, LLC.  Regarding the politics section, a lot more information is needed. What attracts him about the Republican Party?  Is it small government, emphasis on self-reliance and self-empowerment, what?  What kind of Republican is he – social conservative or libertarian, interventionist or isolationist, deficit hawk or tax cutter, etc?  What has Walker said about racial issues, such after the George Floyd killing?  I've read other African American conservatives saying that it can be a lonely road to travel, has he said anything similar?  And what specific policy positions or proposals has Walker put forward?
 * 1) It follows the neutral point of view policy.
 * Fair representation without bias:
 * Article neutrality is generally okay for the sports part of the article. But He is widely considered to be the greatest college football player of all time might be better phrased as "He is often considered ...", given that one of the three cites given does not have him at the top.  Language like The Vikings gave away the store to get him, then refused ... sounds a little too much like disgruntled fandom speaking.  But there are serious neutrality dangers with After Joe Biden won the 2020 election, Walker supported Trump's failed efforts to overturn the election results. Readers may interpret this as implying almost anything, from expressing views about the constitutional role of state legislatures to personally storming the Capitol.  What exactly did Walker say about the election, when did he say it, what did he say should be done about it, and what if anything did he actually do himself about it?  Finally, the "Mental health issues and advocacy" section gives too little information about how dissociative identity disorder  manifested itself with Walker.  The reader may unfairly assume a soap opera-like scenario of multiple distinct personalities.  From what I see from this CNN piece from 2008, the reality with Walker was less like that but did include a number of violent and disturbing episodes, especially towards his wife.  Moreover, some people have expressed skepticism about the diagnosis, and think that it is a vehicle for Walker to evade responsibility for his own actions – see this 2008 New York Times story, for example.  The article needs to include all of this, and right now it does not.
 * 1) It is stable.
 * No edit wars, etc.:
 * Article stability is a little iffy, perhaps because recent mentions of him as a possible senatorial candidate.
 * 1) It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
 * a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
 * There are dozens of images with Walker at Commons, yet this article only has two images in it. At a glance, File:Rep.Peterson and Herschel Walker.jpg, File:Alex Azar and Herschel Walker at US HHS.jpg, and File:Herschel Walker Ret Number.png (even though fan-created) would be good additions.
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:
 * The lack of citing, the organization of the material, the need for more coverage of non-sports activities, and the neutrality concerns around political and personal behavior are all major issues that will take considerable time and effort to correct. So this nomination is a fail.

- since you nominated this, see above, if you haven't seen this yet.  starship .paint  (exalt) 06:17, 30 August 2021 (UTC)
 * - while I am aware that this review has been concluded, I would like to inform you that I have attempted to address the most significant concerns you raised in #4 regarding NPOV, at Herschel Walker and Herschel Walker. Hope that it is better now.  starship .paint  (exalt) 08:07, 30 August 2021 (UTC)