Talk:Hilda Vaughan/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Jamesx12345 (talk · contribs) 19:36, 27 April 2014 (UTC)

I'll review this in the next few days. Jamesx12345 19:36, 27 April 2014 (UTC)


 * I was going to make a few points about the intro but it actually reads quite well and is reasonably clear and concise.
 * "living on the local farms" - I had to "check back" to see that her father was a solicitor. I don't know if that is a reflection on my state of mind or whether more emphasis on her privileged upbringing would help readers.
 * "in which place" - "where"
 * Done.


 * "...they lived for nine years." - needs a ref.
 * Done.


 * "The novel was very favourably received." - this sentence is very abrupt, and there are a few comments from papers in the source that could be added in.
 * Rephrased.


 * I'm not sure what to make of all the red links. Hopefully they will encourage the creation of the necessary articles, but at the moment it looks very 2004.
 * It does indeed, sadly. I might get around to creating a few myself in due course.


 * "...United States with her children..." - this came as something of a surprise. I think the birth of at least the first one should be mentioned.
 * It did, I've rephrased to put this point first.


 * "in order to benefit his health" - some more explanation (if available) would be good.
 * Explained as for the better climate.


 * "and only minimal writing till the end of her life." - this isn't quite right.
 * In what way? Do you mean that the Traherne introduction counts as more than minimal?
 * I understand your meaning now--wording, not meaning. Reworded accordingly.


 * I see the children are mentioned here. As before, I think it would be more effective if they were fitted in chronologically.
 * Probably should. The biographies I use don't linger on her children, but I will try and find where they fit in.
 * Fitted the children into the biography.


 * The Fountain, given that it was a bestseller, should be linked, although there doesn't appear to be an article.
 * Linked, but unlikely to receive an article unless I do it!


 * "and furthermore was not entirely complimentary towards her" - "and was not entirely complimentary of her work" (if this is the case.)
 * Done.


 * What is an aper?
 * Apparently someone who imitates. Perhaps Jones is meaning that the anglicized squirarchy of the border counties imitate English affectations? Not sure.

This article is very nicely written, and was a pleasure to read. Just a few minor points before it can be passed. Jamesx12345 20:16, 27 April 2014 (UTC)


 * I created a navbox at Template:Hilda Vaughan that you might find useful. Jamesx12345 20:28, 27 April 2014 (UTC)


 * Much appreciate the review and the navbox. I'll get around to enacting these changes when I have the time to do then justice in the next few days. Cheers, MasterOfHisOwnDomain (talk) 10:52, 28 April 2014 (UTC)
 * Addressed some of the points. MasterOfHisOwnDomain (talk) 22:43, 2 May 2014 (UTC)


 * Sorry about the massive delay in getting round to this - I've been bogged down with exams. This article is looking really good now, and I have no problem passing it for GA status. Jamesx12345 17:18, 9 May 2014 (UTC)
 * No problem, thanks for the review! MasterOfHisOwnDomain (talk) 18:08, 9 May 2014 (UTC)