Talk:Hurricane Carla/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: TheAustinMan (talk · contribs) 22:03, 21 March 2013 (UTC)

Hello GC, I will be reviewing Hurricane Carla.  TheAustinMan (Talk·Works) 22:03, 21 March 2013 (UTC)

Dashboard Bot Checks

 * Peer reviewer indicates to flip the See Also section with the References section, see [[WP:LAYOUT for details.
 * As always, try your best to include non-breaking spaces for measurements, though this is not a requirement for GAN, it is good practice.
 * No disambiguations or dead links. Good job!  TheAustinMan (Talk·Works) 22:47, 21 March 2013 (UTC)

Lead

 * "The third tropical cyclone and first Category 5 hurricane..." Since you already say tropical cyclone in the sentence prior, try something else, like named storm.
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "Heading north or north-northeastward..." Were the meteorologists or best track not indicative or unsure of such motion?
 * Actually it was both directions, but I changed it to "generally northward".--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "...the outer bands..." Link bands to rainband.
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "...$300 million in losses in Texas alone..." Could use a nb-note indicating that all values listed are in 1961 USDs.
 * "Several tornadoes also touched down in Louisiana and caused the destruction..." → "Several tornadoes also touched down in Louisiana, causing the destruction of..."
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "Minor to moderate damage was also reported to 748 homes and 75 farm and other buildings suffered minor to moderate damage..." Remove the second 'minor to moderate damage' since its redundant–the fact is already mentioned at the beginning of the sentence.
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "6 deaths and $25 million in losses in Louisiana were attributed to Carla." It is preferable to not start a sentence with a number, particularly a numeral.
 * Spelled-out 6.--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "...Kansas, where flash flooding severely damaged crops and 5 people drowned." IMO this should be written as "Kansas, where flash flooding severely damaged crops and drowned 5 people."  TheAustinMan (Talk·Works) 22:47, 21 March 2013 (UTC)
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)

Meteorological history

 * You should link 'upper-tropospheric' to something suitable.
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * Link 'Surface charts' too, one might not know what a surface chart is. Or you could rephrase it to surface weather analysis maps for more clarity. The second usage of surface charts, and any subsequent uses, are o.k.
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "...thus the depression strengthened into Tropical Storm Carla while located just northeast of Cabo Gracias a Dios." Did it strengthen into tropical storm strength, or into a Carla-strength? Try rephrasing to show that the storm was named Carla to reflect its intensity change and not that TS Carla is a type of category.
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "...the storm reach..." Wrong tense.
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "...and fell to a Category 2 hurricane on September 12." 'Degenerated' would be the better term.
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * Link Port Lavaca.
 * Already linked in the lede.--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "Later that day, Carla was downgraded to a tropical storm between Taylor and Coupland." This is the third instance of 'later' so far in this paragraph alone. Try combining with previous sentence or changing wording to avoid too much usage.  TheAustinMan (Talk·Works) 22:47, 21 March 2013 (UTC)
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)

Preparations

 * Link hurricane watch
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "On September 8, a hurricane watch along the southwest coast of the state from Vermilion Bay westward." Missing a verb.
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "In small town along towns along the coast of Texas..." Townception?  TheAustinMan (Talk·Works) 22:47, 21 March 2013 (UTC)
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)

Impact

 * One-syllable numbers here should be spelled out, and elsewhere in the article.
 * Better?--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "...the largest hurricane-related tornado outbreaks on record at the time..." One of the largest, the largest?
 * Actually yes, it was the largest tornado outbreak from a tropical cyclone, at the time.--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "...10 feet (3.0 m) mean sea level..." You should say 10 feet (3.0 m) above (MSL).
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * A lot of the place names in the impact section could use links.
 * Eh, not too many. Most of the place names not linked either had no article or were linked earlier in the article.--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "the highest wind gusts observations" Should be gust, not gusts.
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * Port O'Conner → Port O'Connor
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "...415 other building." building(s)
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "Winds caused a local river..." Do they know which one?
 * Apparently not--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * Link flood stage.
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "2 to 8 inches (51 to 200 mm) of rainfall fell in Grant, Tillman, Washita Counties." Again, don't start a sentence with a number, and you could use  instead of 'to'.
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "...flooded damage in other areas..." Can damage be flooded? You should say flooded property.
 * I actually just ditched the word "flooded"--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "wahsed" Wah.
 * Fexid--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "...in northeastern part..." Either 'in northeastern parts' or 'in the northeastern part,' but not both at the same time.
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "...and $670,000 in damage..." → '...and caused $670,000 in damage'
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "...amounts of 7 inches (180 mm) or throughout northwestern Illinois." Or what?
 * Sometimes I add extra or words here and there.--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "...second wettest tropical cyclone in Illinois..." A link to Illinois' section in wettest tropical cyclones in the United States would be helpful.
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "Occurring a year after Hurricane Donna, officials in the Florida Keys took precautions to brace for potential impact from the storm. The United States Navy flew their planes out of Key West, while Coast Guardsmen evacuated Alligator Reef Light, American Shoal Light, and Sombrero Key Light. Ships docked at Key West sailed out to sea to ride out the squalls." This should go in the Preparations section, not impact.
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "outerbands" Not a compound word.
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "Hydrometeorological Prediction Center" 'Tis now the WPC, unless you want to be historically accurate and call it the 'National Meteorological Center.'
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)


 * "Offshore Honduras on Swan Island, a rainfall amount of 3.89 inches (99 mm) along with wind gusts up to 60 mph (95 km/h)." Add in a 'was reported' between the inch amount and along.  TheAustinMan (Talk·Works) 22:47, 21 March 2013 (UTC)
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)

Aftermath and retirement

 * ...allow all jurisdictions..." Allow(ing)  TheAustinMan (Talk·Works) 22:47, 21 March 2013 (UTC)
 * Fixed--12george1 (talk) 00:14, 22 March 2013 (UTC)