Talk:Hurricane Paul (2012)/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Hurricanehink (talk · contribs) 16:42, 4 July 2014 (UTC)

All in all, pretty good read! ♫ Hurricanehink ( talk ) 16:42, 4 July 2014 (UTC)
 * "The sixteenth tropical cyclone, tenth hurricane, and fifth major hurricane of the season" link which season. You clarify it's 2012 in the previous sentence, so you could just pipe it if you want
 * Piped. YE Pacific Hurricane  17:05, 4 July 2014 (UTC)
 * "several hundred miles south of the coastline of Mexico on October 13" - since it's the lead and you don't have to go into too much detail, why not "south of the Mexican coast on October 13"?
 * Well, it was west, looking at the track :P But fixed. YE Pacific Hurricane  17:07, 4 July 2014 (UTC)
 * Add SSHS when you say "Category 3 hurricane" in the lead
 * Done. YE Pacific Hurricane  17:05, 4 July 2014 (UTC)
 * You should mention in the lead when and where Paul made its closest point of approach to land. In the MH paragraph of the lead, you just say "land interaction"
 * Noted. YE Pacific Hurricane  17:05, 4 July 2014 (UTC)
 * "and remained poorly organized across the remainder of its trek across the Caribbean Sea and Central America" - avoid saying "across" twice. The second one should be "through"
 * That works, done. YE Pacific Hurricane  17:05, 4 July 2014 (UTC)
 * Is all of the beginning of the 3rd MH paragraph really cited to ref 8? It doesn't say anything about it becoming TS Paul six hours after designation, and it doesn't say that the upper-level low put a break in the ridge.
 * It should be the TCR. YE Pacific Hurricane  17:05, 4 July 2014 (UTC)
 * "In addition, a series of microwave passes late in evening" - what is a microwave pass? Did the storm go into a microwave? And what evening?
 * Linked, but not sure if this works. YE Pacific Hurricane
 * Either mention SSHS when you say "Category 1 hurricane", or just say "Paul was upgraded to hurricane status"
 * Noted SSHWS. YE Pacific Hurricane  17:05, 4 July 2014 (UTC)
 * "Cabo San Lucas, Mexico." - so, the first time you mention CSL, you don't say Mexico, but the second time you do. Try switching that around+
 * That's what I get for trusting TAWX. YE <sup style="color:#666660;">Pacific <sup style="color:#666660;">Hurricane  17:05, 4 July 2014 (UTC)
 * I resent this statement. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk) 05:24, 5 July 2014 (UTC)
 * "Punta Eugenia" link
 * Linked. YE <sup style="color:#666660;">Pacific <sup style="color:#666660;">Hurricane  17:05, 4 July 2014 (UTC)
 * "Paul was upgraded to a major hurricane, Category 3 on the Saffir-Simpson Hurricane Wind Scale, the fifth of the season, at 1800 UTC" - on what day?!
 * July 13 :P YE <sup style="color:#666660;">Pacific <sup style="color:#666660;">Hurricane  17:05, 4 July 2014 (UTC)
 * Could you say how close Paul passed within the Baja California peninsula as a tropical cyclone?
 * Watch for overlinking in the preps section
 * Better? YE <sup style="color:#666660;">Pacific <sup style="color:#666660;">Hurricane  17:05, 4 July 2014 (UTC)
 * "1.98 in (50 mm) fell" - of what? Cake?!
 * 4th of July cake :P YE <sup style="color:#666660;">Pacific <sup style="color:#666660;">Hurricane  17:05, 4 July 2014 (UTC)
 * "Roughly 500 residents in Comondú were evacuated to shelter." - why isn't this in the preps section?
 * This is actually. YE <sup style="color:#666660;">Pacific <sup style="color:#666660;">Hurricane  17:05, 4 July 2014 (UTC)
 * "In Loreto, significant destruction occurred and many residents were rendered homeless. Two creeks overflowed their banks, destroying several homes." - why not mention this when you already mention the damage in Loreto?
 * The above few sentences are strictly about damage to roads. YE <sup style="color:#666660;">Pacific <sup style="color:#666660;">Hurricane  17:05, 4 July 2014 (UTC)
 * " due to a combination of nearly a years worth" - it should be year's
 * Good call. YE <sup style="color:#666660;">Pacific <sup style="color:#666660;">Hurricane
 * Can the 4th and 5th impact paragraphs be merged with the third one?
 * No, but I merged the 4th and 5th. YE <sup style="color:#666660;">Pacific <sup style="color:#666660;">Hurricane  17:05, 4 July 2014 (UTC)
 * "A total of 495 people were taken to shelters, including 93 in Ciudad Insurgentes and 300 in San Carlos." - again, why no preps?
 * Looking at the article, it appears it wasn't. I say "were taken" for a reaosn :P YE <sup style="color:#666660;">Pacific <sup style="color:#666660;">Hurricane  17:05, 4 July 2014 (UTC)
 * MX2 - MX$2
 * Whoops. YE <sup style="color:#666660;">Pacific <sup style="color:#666660;">Hurricane  17:05, 4 July 2014 (UTC)
 * Thanks for the review Hink. YE <sup style="color:#666660;">Pacific <sup style="color:#666660;">Hurricane  17:05, 4 July 2014 (UTC)