Talk:Inequality in Hollywood

Untitled
This is an ok beginning. I'm not sure exactly what the topic of the contribution is. Is it gender equality? Inequality in the entertainment industry? Do you have a sense of where it would fit? There are a number of grammatical, punctuation and capitalization issues. Remember, this is something everyone will be able to read.

Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment
This article is or was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment. Further details are available on the course page.

Above undated message substituted from Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment by PrimeBOT (talk) 22:58, 17 January 2022 (UTC)

Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment
This article is or was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): Soc221 Mahoney, Soc221 Morgan-Martin. Peer reviewers: Soc221 Boylan.

Above undated message substituted from Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment by PrimeBOT (talk) 22:58, 17 January 2022 (UTC)

Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment
This article was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment, between 24 January 2019 and 1 May 2019. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): Armand Bogossian, Dallasnguyen, Erikay677, Torybigelow, KrystleW. Peer reviewers: Seanjaelee, Aileenxgui, Hannahdobrott, Arieleliu, Cxndyoh, Ixz, Henry Guan, Angelacaooo, Siddkumaran, Samirnaqvi, Nicgonzie, Marquez94n, Jhammer.ucb.

Above undated message substituted from Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment by PrimeBOT (talk) 22:58, 17 January 2022 (UTC)

Potential changes and sources
Here are some proposed changes to the article. The article needs more neutral language, such as the last lines in Gender Inequality. The first section of the article can be a history section with a chronological timeline of inequality. A number of academic sources can be newly cited here to diversify the types of references in the article. The #OscarsSoWhite and #MeToo movements should be mentioned in their appropriate sections. An ‘efforts made’ or aftermath section should be included to talk about present day inequality and/or equality. A couple more images or other media can be employed to demonstrate the visual representation aspects of inequality, given the media-centric topic.

Bibliography:

Bielby, Denise D., and William T. Bielby. “Women And Men In Film.” Gender & Society, vol. 10, no. 3, 1996, pp. 248–270., doi:10.1177/089124396010003004.

Doane, Ashley Woody. White out: the Continuing Significance of Racism. Routledge, 2003.

Gray, Herman. “Television, Black Americans, and the American Dream.” Critical Studies in Mass Communication, vol. 6, no. 4, 18 May 2009, pp. 376–386., doi:10.1080/15295038909366763.

Kaufman, James C., and Dean Keith Simonton. The Social Science of Cinema. Oxford University Press, 2014.

Reid, Mark A. Redefining Black Film. Berkeley: University of California Press, c1993 1993.

Roediger, David R. Colored White: Transcending the Racial Past. Berkeley: University of California Press, 2002.

Rogin, Michael. Blackface, White Noise: Jewish Immigrants in the Hollywood Melting Pot. Berkeley: University of California Press, c1996 1996.

Romero, Editor:Mary, and Editor:Eric Margolis. The Blackwell Companion to Social Inequalities. John Wiley & Sons, 2005.

Sheridan, Earl. “Conservative Implications of the Irrelevance of Racism in Contemporary African American Cinema.” Journal of Black Studies, vol. 37, no. 2, 1 Nov. 2006, pp. 177–192., doi:10.1177/0021934706292347.

Stam, Robert, and Louise Spence. “Colonialism, Racism and Representation.” Screen, vol. 24, no. 2, 1983, pp. 2–20., doi:10.1093/screen/24.2.2.

Yuen, Nancy Wang. Reel Inequality: Hollywood Actors and Racism. New Jersey, 2016. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Armand Bogossian (talk • contribs) 04:36, 27 February 2019 (UTC)

Edits
Casey, Have you seen the editor's comments on your sandbox? Also, the format of the sandbox doesn't conform to the Wiki style. Make sure you take a look at the handbook on Wiki style. And what makes a good Wikipedia article.Mcassell04 (talk) 00:18, 26 October 2015 (UTC)

Casey, I went through your article and copy edited some of the grammatical errors I found and added hyperlinks as well. I was afraid to add to your article because it would still appear that the article is being constructed and formed and any additions might alter the direction in which you were planning to take the article. I noticed there was nothing under the racial inequality aspect in Hollywood so I found a website for you too look at that could give you some leads and help you form this section.Rsowick (talk) 02:21, 13 November 2015 (UTC) http://breakingbrown.com/2014/04/racial-inequality-and-hollywood-in-2014-by-the-numbers-infographic/

Data
The piece is still very minimal. It could use some additional data. Also, there's a lot more on this topic. Take a look at this cite: https://books.google.com/books?hl=en&lr=&id=0_NMAgAAQBAJ&oi=fnd&pg=PA269&dq=Inequality+and+hollywood&ots=HG6rThx8cO&sig=Io17YtoiW4LXIryX-bQwKdiYqHc#v=onepage&q=Inequality%20and%20hollywood&f=false Also Variety Newspaper has written extensively on the topic. You should be able to identify a lot more. Also, see if you can find other Wiki articles on related topics and then link their article to your work.Mcassell04 (talk) 23:25, 8 November 2015 (UTC)

This is an prevalent topic that should have plenty of sources to pull from. This article would benefit from you expanding upon your introductory sentence by giving some basic background on what Hollywood is, who is involved in it and other basic statistics and information about the movie or TV industry. I think the Gender inequality article will be a good model to follow for your introduction. Just make sure you're keeping it within the context of your topic. Parts of your text under "Gender Inequality" are not neutral, especially "It’s time to have wage equality once and for all. And equal rights for women in the United States of America." These sections simply need statistics that show how the wages or opportunities differ between men and women. I would also consider changing your subheadings to just "Wages" and "Opportunities" so it doesn't sound like you're projecting an opinion on the article. Based on your introduction statement you could also add sections on religious and sexual orientation inequalities in Hollywood. Take a look at History of homosexuality in American film for ideas on how to approach that and other topics. Kjacks48 (talk) 23:49, 12 November 2015 (UTC)

Adding Detail
Consider adding a section link that at least links to other articles about racism in Hollywood/the entertainment industry. As it stands now, the article only has one subsection for Asian Inequality, and would benefit from at least shallow dives into other race's milestones, controversies, etc in Hollywood. Additionally, the section dedicated to Asian Inequality is written somewhat un-encyclopedically, using repetitive sentence starters. Some letters are mistakenly capitalized. There is a quote that is simply inserted with no context and left as its own sentence. The grammar is also suspect, with several instances of, "There is reportedly many instances" when it should be, "There have been" or "There are". Aileenxgui (talk) 18:49, 12 March 2019 (UTC)

Suggestions, Adding New Information to the Article
The article could use some context as well as definition of the topic, I would suggest adding more content to the beginning of the article where it provides the introduction.

The tone of the article also seems a little biased since there a lot of content that does not seem to be cited or backed up.

The article lacks citations, which are helpful too let the audience know where the information is coming from. For example, the data "22 percent more men than women feel that they work regularly and have a large choice of employment opportunities" and "actors of color, pay issues have an even steeper climb" should include a citation link at the end so that the audience can easily access it if needed.

Here is a source/citation that would be helpful for elaborating on "racial inequality" section of the article and includes data on the inequalities on race as well as other features, such as disabilities: https://www.vanityfair.com/hollywood/2018/07/usc-annenberg-study-hollywood-inclusion-riders

Angelacaooo (talk) 02:03, 13 March 2019 (UTC)Angelacaooo

Editing Certain Section Grammar:
For the gender equality section, I propose the section for Lawrence be edited in terms of grammar to become:

"According to Amy Lawrence in her book ‘Echos and Narcissus: Women's Voices in Classical Hollywood Cinema’, a lot was changing in the social rim of things towards the end of the nineteenth century: for example, the growth and use of telephones as a means of communication. The introduction of phonographs contributed to the making of music. However, while all these aspects were evolving, the one thing that remained stagnant was the place society had put women such as Amy Lawrence. Her right to speak even in public spaces was forbidden. She couldn’t just speak freely & whenever she so pleased, unlike men. This had a ripple effect in all social and economical spaces the woman would occupy."

I would also suggest for this section to dive deeper into the social and economical effects this had in Hollywood on woman and provide specific examples to give more factual evidence to support the sentence, rather than just forming an opinion.

Adding detail to racial discrimination
This article is very well written and the tone of it seems to be very neutral. However, I do happen to notice that in the racial discrimination section of this article you do give a good explanation as to what the meaning of it is as well as explain very well what the problem is, yet you only cover one of the minorities (Asian Actors) leaving the other minorities unattended which for some reason does seem right since discriminations happens to all the minorities not only the Asian part of it. Maybe adding some more information into this section of the article will give it a much more value. Thank you. Marquez94n (talk) 04:38, 13 March 2019 (UTC)

Adding Details (more on introduction)
As mentioned by Armand, I also believe more details needs to be added to this article. Specifically, the article appears to not have a proper introduction section. Perhaps talking a little about the history of inequality in Hollywood and what led to debate in this topic might be helpful for readers who have no idea on the topic. Seanjaelee (talk) 06:01, 13 March 2019 (UTC)

Structure and Organization
Right off the bat, the articles has a decent amount of supporting information to back up the main points of the article. However, I would definitely add more information to the racial inequality portion because there is only one population that is distinctly pointed out. It would be helpful to read more about other groups that are facing the same thing. I also suggest adding the potential reason as to why certain groups are not as heavily involved the Hollywood scene. A majority of the sources are credible but I would replace the ones that are written by popular media platforms. The article seems to weigh heavily towards one perspective - would be interesting to read about people that disagree with the main arguments in this article. Jhammer.ucb (talk) 21:34, 13 March 2019 (UTC)