Talk:Interventricular foramina (neuroanatomy)/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Seppi333 (talk · contribs) 05:02, 9 November 2017 (UTC)

Discussion
I thought I had been waiting a long time for a GA review, but I noticed this article was nominated for GA a month prior to mine; since you've already waited a lifetime, I'm taking on the review for this article. I'll provide some comments after my first-pass reading within the next few hours.  Seppi  333  (Insert 2¢) 05:02, 9 November 2017 (UTC)
 * Many thanks, . Time waiting until GA reviews are completely unpredictable. I really appreciate you picking up this review :), but am sorry to say I do not think I would have enough time to counter-review your article that's been waiting to give it the attention it deserves (sorry!) --Tom (LT) (talk) 00:05, 12 November 2017 (UTC)
 * Haha, no worries. I didn't take on this review with the expectation of a quid pro quo review; I just know how annoying it is to have to wait forever for a review.  I actually don't expect anyone to take on the GA review for the HMB article before I renominate it for FA again (and withdraw the GA nomination) in a few months.  I just nominated it in the unlikely event that someone was willing to review its compliance with the GA criteria.  Seppi  333  (Insert 2¢) 02:41, 12 November 2017 (UTC)

Initial comments on prose

 * 1) In the lead, the sentence "They also contain choroid plexus, a specialized CSF-producing structure, that is continuous with that of the lateral and third ventricles, and which is also present in the fourth ventricle." seems a bit awkwardly worded. I think it would be more straightforward to say "The walls of the interventricular foramina contain choroid plexus choroid plexus, a specialized CSF-producing structure that is located along the length of the lateral and third ventricles, and which is also present in the fourth ventricle." (note: I copied the first part of this sentence from Interventricular foramina (neuroanatomy)), provided that this is an accurate statement.  Seppi  333  (Insert 2¢) 23:22, 10 November 2017 (UTC)
 * ✅ improved. The last part about the fourth ventricle doesn't really belong on this article. --Tom (LT) (talk) 00:05, 12 November 2017 (UTC)
 * 1) In "Structure", the phrase connect the lateral ventricles on the left and the right to the third ventricle seems unclear to me. What are "left" and "right" in reference to in this sentence?  Or, to rephrase that, I'm basically asking "on the left and the right of what?"  I assume it's referring to the left/right sides of the head/brain, but that should probably be clarified.  Seppi  333  (Insert 2¢) 23:22, 10 November 2017 (UTC)
 * ✅ clarified. --Tom (LT) (talk) 00:05, 12 November 2017 (UTC)
 * 1) In "Function", shouldn't the sentence — End branches of the medial posterior choroidal arteries, superior thalamostriate, superior choroidal and septal veins also pass through the foramen. – be placed in the "Structure" section?  Seppi  333  (Insert 2¢) 23:22, 10 November 2017 (UTC)
 * ❌ I can see your point here, but I often include things like this in the function section as, in a sense, the one function of the foramen could be said as a hole through which vessels pass. --Tom (LT) (talk) 00:05, 12 November 2017 (UTC)
 * Good point, that's fine with me.  Seppi  333  (Insert 2¢) 02:32, 12 November 2017 (UTC)
 * 1) In "History", in the quote ""... an oval hole, large enough to admit a goose quill, under forepart of the fornix. From this hole, a probe can be readily passed into the other lateral ventricle, shewing [sic], i the first place that the two lateral ventricles communicate with each other"[8] is "i the first place" a typo from the source or a typo in the article? I assume that should read "in the first place".  Seppi  333  (Insert 2¢) 23:22, 10 November 2017 (UTC)
 * ✅ --Tom (LT) (talk) 00:05, 12 November 2017 (UTC)

Update: Alright, with these changes, I'm satisfied with the prose; I'm giving this article a pass on the prose criterion.  Seppi  333  (Insert 2¢) 02:32, 12 November 2017 (UTC)

Comments on article citations and breadth of coverage
I'll probably review the cited sources in the article and check for other sources for the breadth criterion today or tomorrow. Those are the last 2 things I'd need to check before upgrading the article's rating to GA.  Seppi  333  (Insert 2¢) 02:32, 12 November 2017 (UTC)