Talk:Ivan Sratsimir of Bulgaria/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Cerebellum (talk · contribs) 09:19, 6 December 2011 (UTC)

Hello! I will be reviewing this article. --Cerebellum (talk) 09:19, 6 December 2011 (UTC)


 * GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)

Excellent article!
 * 1) It is reasonably well written.
 * a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
 * The prose was a little rough, but I've fixed most of it. There are a couple things left - see comments below.
 * 1) It is factually accurate and verifiable.
 * a (references): b (citations to reliable sources):  c (OR):
 * It's a little hard for me to judge since I am ignorant of the language, but everything sees okay, except that one book is linked to on scribd.
 * 1) It is broad in its coverage.
 * a (major aspects): b (focused):
 * Good job here.
 * 1) It follows the neutral point of view policy.
 * Fair representation without bias:
 * 1) It is stable.
 * No edit wars, etc.:
 * yes
 * 1) It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
 * a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
 * The infobox image is not very good - see comment below.
 * 1) Overall: Okay, looks good now. Happy to pass as GA.
 * Pass/Fail:
 * I'll place this on hold for a few days to give you time to fix the things below, and after that I don't see any problem with making this a GA :)
 * I'll place this on hold for a few days to give you time to fix the things below, and after that I don't see any problem with making this a GA :)

Comments

 * Image: You might want to consider using the full-length image in the infobox, instead of the version with just the head, because the head alone is not very clear.
 * Prose: Born in Lovech in 1324 or 1325, Ivan Sratsimir was the second son of Ivan Alexander (r. 1331–1371), who was at that time the despot of Lovech, and Theodora. In this sentence, it is a little hard to tell what Theodora refers too.  Being unfamiliar with the subject, I initially thought Theodora was part of the kingdom of Ivan Alexander.  Would it work to change it to this? Born in Lovech in 1324 or 1325, Ivan Sratsimir was the second son of Theodora and Ivan Alexander (r. 1331–1371), who was at that time the despot of Lovech.
 * Prose: after his proclamation: what does "proclamation" mean in this context?
 * Prose: and began to use the title Emperor of Bulgarians and Greeks, as his father. Does this mean that he is using the same title his father used? If so, it might make more sense to say and began, like his father, to use the title Emperor of Bulgarians and Greeks.
 * Emperor in Vidin: honorary Hungarian captivity - I am not sure what this means.
 * References: One of the references contains a link to a document on scribd. The reference itself is fine, but I think we should get rid of the scribd link.  Just treat the reference like any other pint reference.


 * Hi, I noticed your comments and decided to make corrections, as you noted. I am also unsure about the proclamation bit and the captivity. I am just guessing it could be a direct translation of the Bulgarian "почетен", in which case it honourable would be more at place, although I am still unsure if it doesn't actually fall astray off the actual meaning.
 * About proclamation, I am guessing it would mean coronation. Maybe something like "After being declared king/tsar/emperor, Ivan Sratsimir.." would do.
 * I am also not sure if he used the title "Emperor of Bulgarians and Greeks" but if he did, and someone verifies this, the way you put it sounds much better. -- L a v e o l  T 11:43, 6 December 2011 (UTC)