Talk:Jane Irwin Harrison/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: RoySmith (talk · contribs) 18:48, 4 January 2024 (UTC)

Prose

 * The three years in "(née Irwin; July 23, 1804 – 1845–1847)" are confusing. I see this is later explained as uncertainty in the year of death, but maybe "c.  1846" would be a better way to express that?
 * "From this marriage, Jane received seven more siblings". I guess that would make them half-siblings?
 * "She was widowed upon the death of her husband": That's an odd sentence; is there any other way to be widowed?
 * "it was decided that his wife Anna Harrison would not travel". Who decided that?  See MOS:WEASEL.
 * "Jane Harrison was chosen" same as above.
 * "incoming president" perhaps use the more common term, "president-elect"?
 * "Also accompanying them", drop "also"
 * "Harrison had asked her aunt" there's multiple Harrisons being discussed. I think you'd do better to refer to her by her first name.
 * "as she had previously lived" it's not clear if "she" is referring to Jane Findlay or Jane Harrison, or maybe even Anna Harrison.
 * "Harrison married widower Lewis Whiteman, and she died of tuberculosis a few years later." This makes it sound as if there was some causal relationship between the marriage and the tuberculosis.
 * I will admit to some general concern over the length of this article, i.e. how short it is. There's nothing in WP:GACR which requires a minimum length (and thus I won't demand additional material), but it stil leaves me wondering if there's more than can or should be said.

Other criteria

 * I didn't find any copyright problems, either from the spot-checked sources or via earwig.
 * Both images have appropriate licenses
 * No WP:OR
 * No problems with stability, neutrality, etc

Finished with initial review. RoySmith (talk) 19:30, 4 January 2024 (UTC)
 * I believe I've addressed everything in the article. I reworded all of the items you listed under prose, and I adjusted the sources as needed. Thebiguglyalien  ( talk ) 01:19, 5 January 2024 (UTC)
 * Looks good, thanks for the quick response. RoySmith (talk) 01:39, 5 January 2024 (UTC)