Talk:Japanese battleship Yamashiro/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Peacemaker67 (talk · contribs) 04:21, 27 February 2013 (UTC)

I'll start this one shortly. Peacemaker67 (send... over) 04:21, 27 February 2013 (UTC) Comments. Regards, Peacemaker67 (send... over) 06:40, 27 February 2013 (UTC)
 * There are several duplicate links, light cruiser, fighter (aircraft), Ise-class battleship, casemate and a couple to List_of_Japanese_World_War_II_radar.
 * All fixed except for the radar links which reference the same list for three different radars.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 07:00, 27 February 2013 (UTC)
 * image files need alt text (not a GA requirement, but worth doing if this is going to ACR))
 * all tool checks come up green (no action required).
 * suggest you leave the reason why she was named that to the second sentence of the lead, it's a bit clunky as it is.
 * Deleted it instead.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 07:00, 27 February 2013 (UTC)
 * "Yamashiro was also given torpedo bulges to improve her underwater protection and to compensate for the weight of the additional armor and her stern was lengthened by 7.62 metres (25.0 ft)." Suggest a comma after armor.
 * Broken out into a separate sentence. Dank may want to comment on this.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 07:00, 27 February 2013 (UTC)
 * "The improvements made during the reconstruction increased Yamashiro's draught by 1 metre (3 ft 3 in); the two foremost six-inch guns were removed, as the same guns on her sister ship Fusō had gotten soaked after that ship's reconstruction. " It is not clear why being soaked would be bad? "Too exposed in rough seas"?
 * Added.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 07:00, 27 February 2013 (UTC)
 * were the "Alf" floatplanes radio-controlled or radio-equipped?
 * Radio-controlled.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 07:00, 27 February 2013 (UTC)
 * Suggest "The submarine USS Halibut missed Junyo but hit Yamashiro with a torpedo that failed to detonate on 8 November." be "On 8 November, the submarine USS Halibut missed Junyo but hit Yamashiro with a torpedo that failed to detonate."
 * Rephrased, but again, Dank might have some thoughts so don't promote this until he's had a chance to comment. Thanks for the review.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 07:00, 27 February 2013 (UTC)
 * Those are all fine with me. - Dank (push to talk) 13:06, 27 February 2013 (UTC)
 * All ok with me. Great work guys, promoting. Peacemaker67 (send... over) 14:00, 27 February 2013 (UTC)