Talk:John Neville, 1st Marquess of Montagu/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Hawkeye7 (talk · contribs) 05:14, 13 September 2017 (UTC)

GA review – see WP:WIAGA for criteria


 * 1) Is it well written?
 * A. The prose is clear and concise, and the spelling and grammar are correct:
 * B. It complies with the manual of style guidelines for lead sections, layout, words to watch, fiction, and list incorporation:
 * 1) Is it verifiable with no original research?
 * A. It contains a list of all references (sources of information), presented in accordance with the layout style guideline:
 * B. All in-line citations are from reliable sources, including those for direct quotations, statistics, published opinion, counter-intuitive or controversial statements that are challenged or likely to be challenged, and contentious material relating to living persons&mdash;science-based articles should follow the scientific citation guidelines:
 * C. It contains no original research:
 * D. It contains no copyright violations nor plagiarism:
 * 1) Is it broad in its coverage?
 * A. It addresses the main aspects of the topic:
 * B. It stays focused on the topic without going into unnecessary detail (see summary style):
 * 1) Is it neutral?
 * It represents viewpoints fairly and without editorial bias, giving due weight to each:
 * 1) Is it stable?
 * It does not change significantly from day to day because of an ongoing edit war or content dispute:
 * 1) Is it illustrated, if possible, by images?
 * A. Images are tagged with their copyright status, and valid fair use rationales are provided for non-free content:
 * B. Images are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions:
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass or Fail:
 * It represents viewpoints fairly and without editorial bias, giving due weight to each:
 * 1) Is it stable?
 * It does not change significantly from day to day because of an ongoing edit war or content dispute:
 * 1) Is it illustrated, if possible, by images?
 * A. Images are tagged with their copyright status, and valid fair use rationales are provided for non-free content:
 * B. Images are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions:
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass or Fail:
 * B. Images are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions:
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass or Fail:
 * Pass or Fail:

Some issues to resolve:
 * 1) . Can you check the recent changes mostly by anonymous IPs are correct.
 * 2) Mostly OK, actually, generally typos, grammar, even the odd date error. Couple of odd changes to page numeration at one point but nothing drastic.
 * 3) . Can we get rid of the bare URls? Use the cite odnb template.
 * 4) Think I caught all them.
 * 5) . On that subject, I think FN 172 duplicates FN1, 8, 30, 32, 40, 43. Refreshingly, they all follow slightly different formatting.
 * 6) Per above, standardising the ODNBs sorted them..
 * 7) . The "Marriage" section duplicates the first half of "Family"
 * 8) Removed the duplicated material, also converted the list of kids to prose. For, I think, the second blooming time.
 * 9) . FN209, 212, 214, 218 and 220 are all pointing at non-existent links. Fix.
 * 10) done
 * Still not right. I don't know what Richardson II (2011), Cockayne (1953) or Gunn (1988) Replace the sfn templates with cite book.  Hawkeye7   (discuss)  21:52, 13 September 2017 (UTC)
 * 1) Right- done. Sure I did them yesterday. Clearly not! thanks for this. &mdash;  fortuna  velut luna  06:25, 14 September 2017 (UTC)
 * Good. I should add that if you want to take the article to FAC, you'll need to make another pass over the footnotes to make them consistent.  Hawkeye7   (discuss)  06:49, 14 September 2017 (UTC)
 * 1) . Is it "Montague" or "Montagu"?
 * 2) Montagu. I think Montague is a road.
 * 3) . "He was installed n 1462, when he took his father's stall" Should be "in"? (is this a choir stall?)
 * 4) Probably. Not sure how much singing they did though.
 * 5) . "duke of York" should be "Duke of York"
 * 6) done
 * 7) . "with Warwick, as representative's of the king" Drop the apostrophe
 * 8) done
 * 9) . " has been described as the hightest point for his House" highest?
 * 10) done
 * 11) .    "earl of Northumberland" should be "earl of Northumberland"
 * 12) -clarify?
 * 13) . "increasingly duisatisfied with his relationship" dissatisfied?
 * 14) done
 * 15) . "Eventually, howeve, "however?
 * 16) done
 * 17) . his brother went into French into exile" ? TMI
 * 18) Rm dup
 * 19) . "He was also one of three men who was instructe   d" were?
 * 20) d. Odd spacing!
 * 21) . "was causatory to his family's long-running feud" ?
 * 22) I.e. that he was personally to blame, along with Egremont; per Wolffe: "The disturbances in Yorkshire were caused by the landless younger sons of the erls of" etc. In any case, I simplified the sentence.
 * 23) . "Gailing to find him"
 * 24) I gailed to spot that, certainly.
 * 25) . "Both him and Egremont were subsequently summoned to appear before the Royal Council, a summons which was ignored by both." he? (and overuse of "both"?)
 * 26) Agree; best to remove the first instance I think.
 * 27) . "the unpopularity of Sir Wiliam Plumpton (the king's man)" Any relation to Sir William Plumpton?
 * Yo
 * 1) . "whom the Nevilles' captured." Drop the apostrophe
 * d
 * 1) "John, however continued to be commissioned by the government. "
 * 2) Make that "...continued to receive commissions from the govt."
 * 3) "Even though he had numeric superiority" "numerical"?
 * 4) Al.
 * 5) "at some point John Nevile" changed the spelling of his name?
 * +l
 * 1) and he requested requested parliament to reaffirm this" Twice apparently
 * 2) -req
 * 3) " women receive livery of their lands" What does "livery" mean here?
 * 4) Etymologically originating with livery as a costume, i.e something one received- but only touched upon, in this particular sense, very briefly in our Livery article. There should probably be a new article on it specifically at some point.
 * 5) "with three baillies, a large keep, and fortified gateways.Dunstanburgh Castle" What does "bailles" mean here? (Consider linking "keep") And insert a space after full stop.
 * 6) It's first person singular for 'Dancing' in Asturian, I believe; could also be a typo for Bailey :) all done
 * 7) "Wrwick was his counterpart" Missing A?
 * A+
 * 1) "This was followed by dutypayments" Insert space?
 * 2) done
 * 3) "would receive from the Bishop in later years" comma after "years"
 * 4) done
 * 5) "with Lords Greystoke and Willoughby" Any relation to Ralph de Greystoke, 5th Baron Greystoke Or Robert Welles, 8th Baron Willoughby de Eresby?
 * 6) Nice one- many thanks
 * 7) "This, with its income of between £700 and £1,000 a year, has been said, was his reward for his decisive victories, since the Crown "had played no direct part in them." Grammar a bit wonky, and who was it that said it?
 * 8) Split into two sentences; v poor not to have an article on one of the first female historians- tba
 * 9) "he was granted the Constableships and honors of Knaresborough and Pontefract castles" Small "c", and "honours"
 * 10) Tweaked whole sentence
 * 11) "Steward of the duchy of Lancaster" "Duchy"
 * 12) d
 * 13) "Montague was the only Nevile to accompany the king on his journey" changed the spelling of his name?
 * 14) Changed per earler mass reversal
 * 15) "Marquisate of Montague" "Marquessate"
 * 16) Also linked, since it was the first in Eng hist; perhaps worth mentioning?
 * 17) "Lncolnshire uprising"  "Lincolnshire"
 * d
 * 1) "earl of Northumberland                " "Earl of Northumberland"
 * 2) done
 * 3) "Readeption of Henry VI' ???
 * 4) Per our article & the scholarship generally
 * 5) "as James Ross has put it,'disaster struck." Space after comma
 * d
 * 1) "In the time him and his force had been absent,    " "he"
 * 2) done
 * 3) "the King personally directed this, and arraged for the corpses" "arranged"
 * 4) done
 * 5) "even though Isabel was over fourteen years-old (an therefore of Legal age)' "and"
 * 6) done (actually, think this was one causght by that IP!)
 * Hawkeye7  (discuss)  05:14, 13 September 2017 (UTC)


 * Thanks very much for that. See above for my changes. I've also added 'Main articles.' "Montagu's attack soon became a route"- Your second opinion? suddenly occured to me that that might make it sound as if somehow his attack was routed, rather than the Lanc defence being routed? Your opinion? &mdash; fortuna  velut luna  16:00, 13 September 2017 (UTC)
 * That's fine. I changed "route" to "rout".  Hawkeye7   (discuss)  21:35, 13 September 2017 (UTC)


 * Looks good. Passing now. There will be a delay while the Bot handles things.  Hawkeye7   (discuss)  06:49, 14 September 2017 (UTC)
 * Thanks, nice one. D'you think that- not counting the footers which I'm going to start on soon- it's got (off te record) potential? I was thinking, maybe A-class? Thank you, agin, for your work here. &mdash; fortuna  velut luna  07:10, 14 September 2017 (UTC)
 * It has potential. I would run it through A-class before taking on FAC.  Hawkeye7   (discuss)  10:56, 14 September 2017 (UTC)