Talk:John Williams (snooker referee)/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: MWright96 (talk · contribs) 05:11, 1 October 2020 (UTC)

Going to review this for the GAN October 2020 Backlog Drive. MWright96 (talk) 05:11, 1 October 2020 (UTC)
 * 1) It is reasonably well written.
 * a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
 * 1) It is factually accurate and verifiable.
 * a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources):  c (OR):
 * 1) It is broad in its coverage.
 * a (major aspects): b (focused):
 * 1) It follows the neutral point of view policy.
 * Fair representation without bias:
 * 1) It is stable.
 * No edit wars, etc.:
 * 1) It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
 * a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:
 * 1) It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
 * a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:
 * Pass/Fail:

Lead

 * An infobox in the lede might help things here
 * Maybe, but I don't think they are mandatory. I'm not really sure which one to use, so I didn't. Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 21:35, 2 October 2020 (UTC)
 * Fair enough. It is only a suggestion. 07:03, 3 October 2020 (UTC)
 * "he took charge of the events quickly and organised the events for many years." - this sentence could be reworded to avoid repetition of the word "events"
 * done Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 21:35, 2 October 2020 (UTC)
 * "and lead to more television coverage." - and resulted in
 * "but has made sporadic appearances " - made
 * done Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 21:35, 2 October 2020 (UTC)

Early life

 * Perhaps add where Rubaon is in Wales?
 * Done Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 21:35, 2 October 2020 (UTC)
 * I think the second and third sentences in this section can be merged together
 * Done Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 21:35, 2 October 2020 (UTC)
 * "His grandfather had been British Bar billiards champion" - I don't think "Bar billiards" needs to begin with a capital letter
 * Fixed Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 21:35, 2 October 2020 (UTC)
 * Any information on the occupation of his first wife?
 * I only have info on the names, but I'll do a search. Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 21:35, 2 October 2020 (UTC)
 * I don't think divorce should be wikilinked
 * done Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 21:35, 2 October 2020 (UTC)

Referee career

 * "during the mid 1960s" - a hyphen is missing in the text in bold
 * done Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 21:44, 2 October 2020 (UTC)
 * "Williams started refereeing snooker matches during the mid 1960s, leaving the civil service in 1981 to become a full-time referee." - much of his information is not backed up by the BBC Sport reference. An extra source is needed to verify this information
 * Added Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 21:44, 2 October 2020 (UTC)
 * The first mention of the word table should be linked to Billiards table
 * Done Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 21:44, 2 October 2020 (UTC)
 * "which was covered in a tarpauline" - typo; should be tarpaulin
 * If you hadn't guessed, I can't spell. Mine still looks more right to me! done Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 21:44, 2 October 2020 (UTC)
 * "This led to news picturing Williams" - led to the press might be an improvement here
 * Good point. Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 21:44, 2 October 2020 (UTC)
 * "finals of any referee,[6][5]" - refs in numerical order please
 * done Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 21:44, 2 October 2020 (UTC)
 * Wikilink black to the relevant article
 * Done Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs)
 * "In total, Williams took officiated 11 World finals," - the word in bold isn't needed
 * Done Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs)
 * "The last world championship final he refereed was in 2002, when Peter Ebdon beat Stephen Hendry in a deciding frame." - The Irish Times does not contain any of this information, only the Sky Sports source attached to it
 * Removed Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 21:44, 2 October 2020 (UTC)
 * "In 1983, Williams was awarded a two-year suspended prison sentence," - I think received is a more appropriate word for this portion of text
 * Done Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 21:44, 2 October 2020 (UTC)
 * "after pleading guilty to selling snooker tables worth £6,500 that did not exist." - more concise; selling non-existant snooker tables worth £6,500.
 * Changed Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 21:44, 2 October 2020 (UTC)
 * Is there any information about the end result of Williams suing the WPBSA for wrongful dismissal?
 * I didn't see much. I don't think that it ever went as far as the courts. Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 21:44, 2 October 2020 (UTC)
 * "They refereed the final of 17 of the first 20 World Championship finals held at the Crucible." - the word in bold should be changed to Crucible Theatre for formality
 * Done Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 21:44, 2 October 2020 (UTC)
 * Wikilink Sydney Lee to the relevant article
 * Done Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 21:44, 2 October 2020 (UTC)
 * "he became the referee in snooker television show" - of the
 * Done Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 21:44, 2 October 2020 (UTC)
 * Wikilink 2012 tournament to 2012 World Seniors Championship
 * Done Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 21:44, 2 October 2020 (UTC)