Talk:Jozo Tomasevich/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk · contribs) 21:09, 26 December 2023 (UTC)

I'll take a look at this. Pickersgill-Cunliffe (talk) 21:09, 26 December 2023 (UTC)

Prelim

 * Article is stable
 * Images correctly licensed
 * No duplicated links
 * Earwig reports copyvio unlikely

Lede and infobox

 * This is a very large lede, being close in size to the two sections of main text; it's not a requirement for this, but I'd probably look into shortening it
 * I'm reluctant to do that, so will see what others think at ACR. Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 09:58, 3 January 2024 (UTC)


 * Link quisling
 * Done. Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 09:58, 3 January 2024 (UTC)


 * Main text does not provide the place of death in infobox
 * Yep, have deleted for now, I imagine I will find one before I nominate it for ACR. Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 10:59, 3 January 2024 (UTC)


 * Main text does not say that he was given American citizenship
 * I have a source for this (a Yugoslav war crimes trial transcript), but it will have to wait a week until I have access to my desktop. Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 10:53, 3 January 2024 (UTC)

Early life, education, career and family

 * Slightly confusing that the main text begins by using Tomašević and then goes the rest of the article only using Tomasevich, despite him only changing name style in the, I assume, late 1930s
 * Good point, used the Slavic spelling until then. Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 10:11, 3 January 2024 (UTC)


 * State where the "availing himself of the rich resources of Harvard University" quote comes from
 * cited more closely to make this clear. Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 10:47, 3 January 2024 (UTC)


 * Would be interesting to know what exactly his role was during the war with the Board of Economic Warfare and the United Nations Relief and Rehabilitation Administration
 * I haven't seen a source that goes into this in any detail. Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 09:58, 3 January 2024 (UTC)

Scholarship

 * Citation #1 is repeated unnecessarily in paragraph 2
 * The first one is there because it follows a quote. Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 10:13, 3 January 2024 (UTC)


 * Why in reviewing a book on economics is it necessary to say that Lamer later worked in food and agriculture?
 * It is establishing Lamer's bonafides to have a valued opinion on the matter, especially given he does not have an article. Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 10:25, 3 January 2024 (UTC)


 * In paragraph 3 108 words are your prose, while 121 are various quotes; it reads well enough but I think you could look to paraphrase a little more often!
 * A fair observation, but in the case of reviews, I think the reviewers' words often do the job best, and there can also be no argument about what they meant. Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 10:44, 3 January 2024 (UTC)


 * "This led in to work"
 * Done. Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 10:13, 3 January 2024 (UTC)


 * "basically a study in politics, ideology and military operations, although the role of the economic factor has not been overlooked" according to who?
 * Vucinich, added. Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 10:25, 3 January 2024 (UTC)


 * "reviewed the book positively"
 * Done. Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 10:42, 3 January 2024 (UTC)


 * Link quisling
 * Done. Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 10:42, 3 January 2024 (UTC)


 * Not sure we need "so-called" Independent State of Croatia
 * It is often referred to in that way because it was hardly independent, it was basically a quasi-protectorate of the Axis. Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 10:13, 3 January 2024 (UTC)


 * "and remains unpublished." best to give a date for this...you never know!
 * Done. If it was published, it would make my year! Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 10:48, 3 January 2024 (UTC)


 * "According to Alexander Vucinich" no need to repeat full name again
 * Done. Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 10:13, 3 January 2024 (UTC)