Talk:Komm, gib mir deine Hand / Sie liebt dich/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 06:54, 16 March 2021 (UTC)

Oldest songs GAN that is eligible for review, so appropriate for me to take this on! --K. Peake 06:54, 16 March 2021 (UTC)

Infobox and lead

 * WP:OVERLINK of West Germany under A-side in the infobox
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Remove only before "Hand" and "dich"
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * The release info should come directly after the liberties sentence, plus move the German language versions info to being part of the opening sentence instead
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * The release sentence should begin with "The German versions were released..." then following the rest, plus add the US info here instead
 * Done. I began the sentence as "Odeon Records released the German version..." to avoid passive voicing. Let me know if this looks O.K.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * The commercial performance info is out of order; this should be directly after the recording info of the third para for both countries
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Remove introductions on Odeon Records, George Martin and Brian Epstein because them being introduced in the body is sufficient
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "the German market the Beatles" → "the German market, the Beatles" to fix the sentence flow
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Remove pipe on UK, plus shouldn't this be the United Kingdom since you wrote the United States?
 * Done and done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "For "Komm, gib mir deine Hand" they" → "For "Komm, gib mir deine Hand", they"
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "Their subsequent practice" → "The band's subsequent practice"
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Remove wikilink on English Language
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Remove wikilink on Europe
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)

Background

 * Retitle to Background and development
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Remove wikilink on the Beatles
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Pipe Olympia Theatre to Olympia (Paris)
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "On 25 January," → "On 25 January 1964,"
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "number one in America" → "number one in the United States"
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Merge the second para with the above one per the short length
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "conceived of the Beatles" → "conceived the Beatles"
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "in West Germany they" → "in West Germany, the band"
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Remove pipe on B-side
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "John Winn translates" → "John C. Winn translates" per the source
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Wikilink Lennon–McCartney
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Pipe chorus to Refrain
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "says that "The German rewrite" → "says, "The German rewrite"
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)

Recording

 * "The tape travelled with Martin and Smith" → "The tape was brought by Martin and Smith during their travels"
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Merge the second para with the above one per my earlier comment
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * [8] should solely be after the last proper sentence of the new para because it is the sole ref
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Pipe china pot to Porcelain
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "and the group's only outside the UK." → "and the band's only one outside of the United Kingdom." per my earlier comment
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Merge the fourth para with the above one
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Img looks good apart from the missing full-stop, but it is fine to have this be at the start of the merged para
 * Done and added full-stop.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "was the first song recorded" specify what this means, i.e it being the first song of the two or something else
 * Now, "was the first of three songs recorded that day."  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "Martin produced, supported" → "Martin produced it, being supported"
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Pipe mixed to Audio mixing (recorded music)
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "from four- to" is the dash supposed to be here? If so and it's a different format of the one at the end of the sentence, change to four-track
 * Changed to four-track.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "as well as Harrison's" → "as well as George Harrison's" with the wikilink
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "Lennon's rhythm guitar" → "John Lennon's rhythm guitar" with the wikilink
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "on "She Loves You" he" → "on "She Loves You", he"
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Merge the penultimate para with the above one, especially in the context of the two days later part
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "on 31 January." → "on 31 January 1964."
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "record four takes" either add "of" or "for" after this, depending on which the source mentions
 * now, "to record four takes of 'Can't Buy Me Love'".  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "the joined edit of" → "the combined edit of"
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "On 12 March," → "Two days after the initial mix,"
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "and the US." → "and the United States." per MOS:US
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Pipe register to Register (music)
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)

Release

 * Retitle to Release and impact
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Quote box looks good!
 * :)  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "in West Germany" → "across West Germany"
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Remove obvious wikilink on Australia
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "in June 1964," → "during June 1964,"
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉)  13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Merge the second para with the above one per my earlier comment
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Shouldn't you write record label instead of label?
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "to that song." → "to the song."
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "They released "Sie liebt dich" b/w "I'll Get You" in America" → "Swan released "Sie liebt dich" b/w "I'll Get You" in the US"
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "on the North American album" → "on the Beatles' North American album"
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "for new Beatle material." → "for new Beatles material."
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Move the part about them never recording foreign versions again to the end of the section, as this specifically deals with impact
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Is the ellipsis in Martin's quote part of the original or is it added in; if the latter, surround by [] to make this clear
 * It is not part of the original. Added square brackets.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Remove wikilink on English language
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Pipe Rarities to Rarities (1978 The Beatles album) per MOS:LINK2SECT
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "this release eliminates a" → "the release eliminates a"
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Remove "the album" intro to Something New since this is already known
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "It remained unavailable" → "The song remained unavailable"
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Pipe Rarities to Rarities (1980 Beatles album)
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "on the 1988 compilation" → "for the 1988 compilation"
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Is the word "respectively" needed at the end of the sentence when there is no difference indicated for the releases other than the titles?
 * Unneeded and removed.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Pipe Second World War to World War II
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)

Personnel

 * Shouldn't this be titled credits and personnel?
 * I have only seen "Personnel" as a section title on Beatles articles. For example, FAs Something, Hey Jude, The Long and Winding Road


 * Use so there is the right space between credits and personnel
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)

Charts

 * Remove the sub section because that is redundant when all positions are weekly; mention in the table captions that they are for weekly chart performance of the songs
 * Done.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)

Final comments and verdict

 * until all of the issues are fixed, but feel free to reach out if you have any questions! --K. Peake 10:50, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
 * Thanks for the taking the time to go through this so thoroughly. I only have one FA under my belt and its in something completely different, so I appreciate your help here. I have gone through and made most of the changes you suggested. See my comments above. Cheers.  Tkbrett  (✉) 13:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)
 * ✅ now, you did misunderstand my comment about the chart table so I fixed that for you and I also edited the lead after the last para stood out as too short. --K. Peake 18:11, 16 March 2021 (UTC)