Talk:Kurama (YuYu Hakusho)/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: TeenAngels1234 (talk · contribs) 09:36, 2 March 2023 (UTC)

Okay. So it begins.--TeenAngels1234 (talk) 09:36, 2 March 2023 (UTC) "There were other surname candidates such as the Japanese celebrities Minamida, Ishino and Gushiken whose first names are also Youko". Good work.--TeenAngels1234 (talk) 21:24, 3 March 2023 (UTC) Revised the notes. Thanks for the review.Tintor2 (talk) 22:16, 3 March 2023 (UTC) That's all. Forgive me if I am always a little slow.TeenAngels1234 (talk) 11:04, 5 March 2023 (UTC) Revised everythingTintor2 (talk) 13:45, 5 March 2023 (UTC)
 * "As the next arcs which primarily relied on action much to Togashi's pressure, Kurama became a prominent fighter". I would suggest rewriting the sentence with more commas, different consecutio temporum and more clearly. Something like (don't take it literally): "As the next arcs, which primarily relieve on action, Kurama became a prominent fighter much to Togashi's pressure".
 * I would add a summary of Reception in the incipit.
 * ""the typical "desu ne (ですね)"". Inverted commas are missing. It should be italicised for Japanese. In the nihongo template, the translation is missing.
 * ""Youko Minamino"". Why the inverted commas? This does not seem to be the guideline. Also, I would add a wlink. Even if the article isn't there, it's not a problem.
 * "There were other surname candidates such as the Japanese celebrities Minamida, Ishino and Gushiken whose first names are also Youko". I would add a few commas, such as ", such as" and ", whose first name".
 * "and considers Hiei to be her favorite". It is stricly necessary?
 * How come Human World is capitalised? Are we sure this is correct?
 * They call it Human World but revise.
 * I would present Hei, Goki and especially the tree Underwolrd treasures better. Also 'two guys called', 'jewels called', or similar things would be enough.
 * There is a parenthesis at the end of the paragraph, but I would put the anime issue in a separate sentence.
 * Present other subjects better too. For example 'of the entities called Four Beasts'.
 * I would move the comment on Kishimoto to the end of the paragraph.
 * Designer Mari Kitayama's comment seems superfluous to me.
 * Okay, then. Good prose. Article clear to me, and I have never seen the anime. Short, but comprehensive enough. Excellent sources in line with the WProject Anime guides. Passing.--TeenAngels1234 (talk) 19:07, 5 March 2023 (UTC)