Talk:Kylie Minogue (album)/GA1

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.''

Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 13:58, 5 March 2021 (UTC)

I will start reviewing later on, but this article is quite large so it admittedly won't be fully reviewed until tomorrow. --K. Peake 13:58, 5 March 2021 (UTC)

Infobox and lead

 * Remove the usage of the word "studios" in the studio parameter per Template:Infobox album
 * "Mushroom Records released it in Australia." → "while a release was issued through Mushroom Records in Australia on the same date."
 * "with the independent label" → "with the independent record label" with the wikilink
 * "After unsuccessful sessions" → "After generally unsuccessful sessions"
 * "containing elements of electronic dance," → "containing elements of dance," with the target, as this is what the section really backs up
 * "Minogue showcases her vocal range in the mid-tempo tracks" this is not properly referenced, only being mentioned for one track in the body
 * "seduction, womanhood, and the enjoyment of life." → "seduction and womanhood." per British English, plus only one song is about the enjoyment
 * Target Music critics to Music journalism
 * "and deemed it the start of a new phase in her" → "while observing the start of a new phase in Minogue's"
 * "It experienced moderate success worldwide, peaked in" → "The album peaked in" because the "moderate success" part is not appropriate lead language
 * "and was certified gold" → "alongside being certified gold"
 * "The album attained top 40" → "It attained top 40"
 * "in Sweden, Switzerland and" → "in Switzerland, Sweden and" for consistency with the reverse alphabetical order
 * "a limited coffee-table book" → "a limited edition coffee-table book" with the target
 * ""Put Yourself in My Place", and" → ""Put Yourself in My Place" and"
 * "Highly popular film projects" part is not properly sourced, only being mentioned in the lead for one delay
 * "the album dropped" → "Kylie Minogue dropped"
 * "Kylie Minogue was re-issued" → "The album was re-issued"
 * All done. Damian Vo (talk) 04:49, 7 March 2021 (UTC)

Background

 * Target Deconstruction to Deconstruction Records on the quotebox
 * "In 1991, Kylie Minogue released" → "In 1991, Minogue released"
 * [6][3] should be put in numerical order
 * Wikilink record labels
 * Target indie label to Independent record label
 * Target dance to Dance music
 * "to forgo a major label contract." → "to sign an indie label contract." per the source
 * [11][10] put in numerical order
 * "liked [their] attitude," → "liked [Destruction's] attitude," because you have not mentioned the label name for a while plus [] is for paraphrasing
 * All done. Damian Vo (talk) 04:49, 7 March 2021 (UTC)

1993: Early sessions

 * "but their work was scrapped" → "but their work was mostly scrapped." per punctuation and since they have credits on other editions
 * "and intended to push her" → "with him intending to push her"
 * Remove wikilink on dance music
 * [14][1] put in numerical order
 * Target pop to Pop music
 * "in planning the album" → "in planning for the album"
 * "Minogue was flattered and" → "She was flattered and" to avoid starting two consecutive sentences with her surname
 * "said that this attempt suggests" → "said that this attempt suggested"
 * "the making of her album." → "the making of the album."
 * Maybe you should mention around the "were scrapped" part that however, Saint Etienne had involvement with the album editions?
 * Target Bob Stanley to Bob Stanley (musician)
 * "later remarked that her camp" → "later remarked that the singer's camp" to be specific
 * Target single to Single (music)
 * ""When Are You Coming Home?" but dropped it" → ""When Are You Coming Home?", but scrapped the song"
 * "on the tracklist and was the only song listing" → "on the tracklist of Kylie Minogue and was the only song to list"
 * "approached her to work" → "approached Minogue to work" since this is a new para
 * Introduce who Prince is
 * "she had written, entitled "Baby Doll". Prince" → "she had written for a song entitled "Baby Doll"; Prince" because the sentences are too short
 * "making Mama Said (1991), and" → "making his fourth studio album Mama Said (1991) and"
 * "Minogue and Bobby Gillespie" → "The singer and Bobby Gillespie"
 * [22] should not be mid-sentence when it is also invoked at the end
 * "but their record company" → "but their record label"
 * [22][19] put in numerical order
 * Lowercase the Beloved and the Auteurs per MOS:THEMUSIC
 * "for the album but they" → "for Kylie Minogue, but the material"
 * The source says nothing about the song not being released on the album
 * All done. Damian Vo (talk) 04:50, 7 March 2021 (UTC)

1993–1994: Later development

 * "Deconstruction co-founders Keith Blackhurst and Pete Hadfield were" → "Hadfield and fellow Deconstruction co-founder Keith Blackhurst were"
 * Target electronic to Electronic music
 * "Minogue met the pair at" → "Minogue met Brothers in Rhythm at"
 * [24][16] put in numerical order
 * Img looks good!
 * [25][12] put in numerical order on both occasions
 * "vocals. She gained confidence" → "vocals, while she gained confidence"
 * "recording the album." → "recording Kylie Minogue."
 * "chief producer, and produced four tracks on the album:" → "chief producer and produced four of the tracks:"
 * [28] should be solely at the end of the para since it is used for both the penultimate and last sentences
 * Remove comma after Power Station
 * "outside the United Kingdom." → "outside the UK."
 * [28][21] put in numerical order
 * No source says specifically that "Intuition" was recorded during those sessions
 * "work with SAW, and" → "work with SAW and"
 * [31][19] put in numerical order on both occasions
 * Identify the duo name of Pete Heller and Terry Farley
 * "Label mate M People" → "Minogue's label mate M People"
 * "for the album but" → "for Kylie Minogue, but"
 * [28][19] put in numerical order on both occasions
 * "on the final album are" → "on the album are"
 * Remove comma after "Time Will Pass You By"
 * All done. Damian Vo (talk) 04:50, 7 March 2021 (UTC)

Music and lyrics

 * Remove comma before that
 * Elements of hip hop, acid jazz and club music are also listed by PopMatters; shouldn't you mention these?
 * Great catch! Added to the paragraph. Damian Vo (talk) 04:58, 7 March 2021 (UTC)


 * [32][13] put in numerical order
 * "wrote that the record is" → "wrote that the album is"
 * "found the album includes" → "found Kylie Minogue includes"
 * "described the album as" → "describe the album as" because that is a biography quote, not an online source one
 * Digital Spy should not be italicised
 * "dance productions, and tracks" → "dance productions and tracks"
 * "embrace of club music that emulate" → "embracement of club music that emulates"
 * Target 12" to Twelve-inch single
 * Audio sample looks good!
 * "The album opens with" → "Kylie Minogue opens with"
 * The first source mentions the song's indie pop elements, rather than indie itself or dance-pop
 * "features an orchestral arrangement by" → "features an arrangement by" per the source
 * "because of the interpolations" → "because of the interpolation" with the target
 * Add the liner notes before [38], as they are needed for a source of the name he is credited under
 * Remove target on Balearic pop
 * "jazz, and R&B-influences," → "jazz and R&B-influences,"
 * Why is [13] here when it offers no mention of the track?
 * The track is mentioned: "the sensuous jazz entreaties of “Surrender” and “Automatic Love”". Damian Vo (talk) 04:48, 7 March 2021 (UTC)


 * [35][34] put in numerical order
 * Wikilink Tia Carrere
 * [13] calls the track disco and acid jazz-based so reword accordingly, plus why is [14] here when it backs up nothing again?
 * Wikilink power ballad per MOS:LINK2SECT
 * Target trip-hop to Trip hop
 * Why is [14] here when it does not back up any of the sentence?
 * [35][40][34] put in numerical order
 * "is a ballad" → "is a chilled-out track" per the source calling it this and not a ballad
 * "that showed Minogue" → "that show Minogue" but none of this sentence is backed up by the source
 * From the source: "sensuous jazz entreaties of 'Surrender' and 'Automatic Love'. These ballads had Minogue eager in her burgeoning womanhood". Damian Vo (talk) 04:48, 7 March 2021 (UTC)


 * [13] should solely be at the end of the sentence
 * "Minogue whispered the lyrics" → "Minogue whispers the lyrics" because this is about the song itself, not its recording
 * Again, [13] does not back up the material of the last two sentences of this para
 * From the source: “Where Has the Love Gone?” and “Falling”, tempestuous uptempos, veered from the traditional CD length; letting the arrangements breathe, the songs were deliciously fussy with lines like "I'm a woman and I've got my vanity". Damian Vo (talk) 04:48, 7 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "encapsulated Minogue's trademark" → "encapsulates Minogue's trademark" but only the piano house part is sourced
 * From the source: "Minogue's trademark “joie de vivre” that encapsulated her "Smilie Kylie" days (think "Got To Be Certain") got a sophisticated makeover on the salty swing of “If I Was Your Lover” and the grinning “Time Will Pass You By”." Damian Vo (talk) 04:58, 7 March 2021 (UTC)

Artwork and release

 * Retitle to Artwork and title
 * Oops! Damian Vo (talk) 05:05, 7 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Img looks good!
 * "shot the album's artwork," → "shot the artwork for Kylie Minogue,"
 * "lasted for seven hours" → "lasted for around six or seven hours" per the source
 * Target androgynous to Androgyny
 * [43] should be at the end of the para rather than the last two sentences, but keep in the other areas due to the different refs being used
 * ""delightful" adding the album" → ""delightful", adding Kylie Minogue"
 * "and that the cover is" → "further writing that the cover is"
 * "felt the cover reflects" → "feel the cover reflects"
 * "which they compared" → "which they compare"
 * "commented that Minogue's image" → "comments that Minogue's image"
 * "Smith felt the simple title" → "Smith feels the simple title"
 * All done. Damian Vo (talk) 05:05, 7 March 2021 (UTC)

Release and promotion

 * Img looks good!
 * "and European countries by" → "and other European countries by"
 * "and in Australia" → "and in Australia simultaneously" to be specific
 * "on 21 October 1994 with" → "on 21 October 1994 by the former of the two labels with"
 * Wikilink bonus tracks per MOS:LINK2SECT
 * Remove comma after the brackets
 * Introduce Enjoy Yourself as being her second studio album
 * "and Geffen Records dropped" → "with Geffen Records dropping"
 * Target BMG to Bertelsmann Music Group
 * [59][60] should solely be at the end of the para together, as this pair is used for the last two sentences
 * "including Minogue's album, which was scheduled in" → "including the album, which was scheduled for"
 * "It was re-released in Australia" → "Kylie Minogue was re-released in Australia" since this is a new para
 * "B-sides, and a" → "B-sides and a" with the target
 * "unreleased track titled" → "unreleased track, titled"
 * Wikilink reissued
 * Target vinyl to Phonograph record
 * "as white vinyl" → "as a white vinyl"
 * "Kylie Minogue appears on" → "Kylie Minogue appear on"
 * "while Minogue's recorded there." → "while Minogue recorded there."
 * [70][57] put in numerical order
 * "Debbie Harry-theme photoshoot" → "Debbie Harry-themed photoshoot"
 * New York Factory → the Factory studio
 * [57] should be only at the end of the para instead of the last two sentences, as it backs both up (keep in other areas though)
 * Remove wikilink on coffee table book
 * All done. Damian Vo (talk) 05:40, 7 March 2021 (UTC)

Singles

 * Wikilink lead single on the img text, plus a second full-stop is needed
 * "Her cover of "Nothing Can Stop Us" and "If You Don't Love Me" and" → "Her covers of "Nothing Can Stop Us" and "If You Don't Love Me", alongside"
 * Remove target on B-side
 * "Farley and Heller (billed as Fire Island) featured" → "Fire Island featured"
 * Wikilink music video
 * "and reaching number 10 in France and number 39 on the US Billboard Dance Club Songs chart." → "while reaching numbers 10 and 39 in France and on the US Billboard Dance Club Songs chart, respectively."
 * Correct name the Australia chart the ARIA Singles Chart
 * [29][8][9] put in numerical order
 * Remove comma after film
 * "reached number eleven in" → "narrowly missed the top 10, reached number 11 in both" per MOS:NUM
 * Neither of the first two sentences of the last para are backed up by [13]
 * From the source: Whispers of an attempted U.S. breach with “If I Was Your Lover” did not come to fruition. Minogue began to consider “Time Will Pass You By” as her concluding single..."


 * ""Where Is The Feeling?" was planned" → "The song was planned" but why does "The" start with capitalisation here but not elsewhere?
 * The last sentence is not backed up by ref 13; I just did some research and saw that page 2 sources it though, so you can add a citation for that here and maybe for the other info using a ref name; I don't know since I did not look through it in great detail yet
 * The site has since merged two pages of the article into one :D Damian Vo (talk) 05:39, 7 March 2021 (UTC)

Critical reception

 * Retitle to Reception, as there is a list of awards at the end of the section
 * "received generally positive reviews from music critics." → "was met with generally positive reviews from music critics." with the target
 * [33][17] put in numerical order
 * "off with ease."" → "off with ease"." per MOS:QUOTE
 * "classy", and "remarkably" → "classy" and "remarkably"
 * A number of these are reviews not available on online pages; should some be in the present tense, as I'm not entirely sure honestly?
 * I used the past tense for all the reviews, same as two other articles that you previously reviewed (Rhythm of Love, Let's Get to It). Damian Vo (talk) 05:55, 7 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Remove target on Classic Pop
 * "previous albums, and concluded" → "previous albums and concluded"
 * "found the recording" → "found the album"
 * Mention Jonathan Bernstein of Spin by name
 * "mid-tempo material was the" → "mid-tempo material is the"
 * Cite page 2 for [13] yet again; plus the Madonna parts are mostly not sourced
 * The site has already merged two pages into one :D Damian Vo (talk) 05:55, 7 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "Harrison concluded the records" → "Harrison concluded that the records"
 * Make the ARIA Music Awards a separate para, as this is fine when there is not enough content to start a sub-section
 * "for "Confide In Me", and" → "for "Confide In Me" and"
 * All done. Damian Vo (talk) 05:55, 7 March 2021 (UTC)

Commercial performance

 * Does the PopMatters source really back up the album receiving moderate success?
 * "her fifth top-ten entry." → "her fifth top-10 entry on the UK Albums Chart." per MOS:NUM, with the wikilink
 * [91][8] put in numerical order
 * "It fell to number thirteen the following week, and" → "It fell to number 13 the following week and"
 * Add BPI in brackets for the certification body
 * "certified it gold within a month of its release" → "certified Kylie Minogue gold within a month of the album's release"
 * Mention that it sold those copies in the UK
 * "on the UK Albums Chart, and" → "on the UK Albums Chart and"
 * "the album had previously peaked" → "Kylie Minogue had previously peaked"
 * "spent 11 weeks on the chart." → "spent 11 weeks on the ARIA Albums chart."
 * "the eighty-fourth best-selling album of the year" → "the 84th best-selling album of 1994"
 * Add ARIA in brackets for the certification body
 * Mention that it sold those copies in Australia
 * "the album peaked at" → "Kylie Minogue peaked at"
 * [102][53] put in numerical order
 * All done. Damian Vo (talk) 06:03, 7 March 2021 (UTC)

Track listing

 * [28][38] put in numerical order
 * Done. Damian Vo (talk) 06:09, 7 March 2021 (UTC)

Personnel

 * Target Tim Bran to Dreadzone
 * Done. Damian Vo (talk) 06:10, 7 March 2021 (UTC)

Charts

 * Good

Certifications and sales

 * Good

Release history

 * Maybe add an edition col since there were a number of different ones?
 * I think it may be unnecessary. The only different editions are the standard and special (in 2003), since the re-releases are all the same. Regional ones are already reflected by the "region" col. Damian Vo (talk) 06:08, 7 March 2021 (UTC)

Final comments and verdict

 * until all of the issues are fixed; that review took a while but was definitely worth it! --K. Peake 20:40, 6 March 2021 (UTC)
 * I believe I have addressed all your comments above. Thanks again for reviewing yet another lengthy article of mine with such detailed comments and dedication. Damian Vo (talk) 06:20, 7 March 2021 (UTC)
 * ✅ now, I too am appreciative of you for your responses always being so timely and accurate! --K. Peake 11:44, 7 March 2021 (UTC)