Talk:L.A. Burdick

Reagle review
@Anabellakb, this is a good start but you still have some work to do ASAP.


 * 1) Finishing inserting and formatting your references.
 * 2) Revise all prose with respect to encyclopedic tone and removing  "puffery". It presently reads to much like marketing material (i.e., "peacock prose"). See these slides.

Please let me know when you've done so. -Reagle (talk) 18:18, 27 February 2023 (UTC)

NoahConstrictor's Peer Review
@Anabellakb, I made a handful of copy edits to the live article. Let me know what you think of the changes. Most substantially, I removed a phrase in the section which referred to Newbury Street at "the heart of the city" of Boston. I think there is a better way to embellish this location, perhaps by referring to its relevance as a major shopping district as cited by a reference.

One major suggestion I have is to reformat the "locations" section. Instead of listing out which locations exist and when they were established, I think it would be more concise if you created a table containing this information. That way, the reader could parse this information more quickly instead of having to read a paragraph which essentially amounts to rewording for each location.

I'm glad I had the opportunity to review this article! Having visited the Newbury Street location once, I was happy to learn more about the venture, and I'm looking forward to seeing how you continue to refine the article. NoahConstrictor (talk) 16:39, 31 March 2023 (UTC)

Wiki Education assignment: Online Communities
— Assignment last updated by Nustudent1120 (talk) 17:53, 11 April 2023 (UTC)