Talk:Leaf by Niggle/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: 1TWO3Writer (talk · contribs) 07:45, 1 August 2023 (UTC)

I will be reviewing this article as part of the 2023 August backlog. From a preliminary viewing, there are no reasons to quick fail (this pdf seems to be a copy from the Wikipedia article, ergo not copyvio).


 * Noted, and many thanks for reviewing. Chiswick Chap (talk) 08:36, 1 August 2023 (UTC)

Lead
No issues here, complies with MOS:LEAD as it gives an accurate overview of the short story, with the context provided and referenced in the article body.
 * Noted.

Context
Again, no issues. Relevant due to info provided in Analysis.
 * Noted.

Plot summary
Does not go over the 700 word guideline. Relevant detail for the remainder of the article.
 * Noted.

...but Niggle's next door neighbour, a gardener named Parish, frequently drops by asking for various forms of help. Parish is lame and has a sick wife and genuinely needs help. Niggle, having a good heart, takes time out to help... Feels awkward. Could be rewritten to be more concise and flowing. I'd recommend removing at least one instance of the word help.
 * Done.

He has not prepared, and as a result ends up in a kind of institution, in which he must perform menial labour each day. Further context is needed for those unfamiliar with the story; why would being unprepared lead Niggle to being institutionalized? A reason for the trip should be provided. If you don't want to bulk up the article, the However, there are many mundane chores and duties that prevent Niggle from giving his work the attention it deserves could be made more concise.
 * Edited both.

...lovely place... Lovely is not needed in my opinion.
 * Removed.

Publication history
Spot-check of sources show coverage. No issues I think.
 * Noted.

Allegory
Spot-check shows sources are good.
 * Noted.

Of the journey of death
Spot-check on sources seem good.
 * Noted.

..."Leaf by Niggle" could lead to the conclusion that the allegory of "Leaf by Niggle"... Repetitive, I think. Fixed. ...just such a text", ... Unsure as to whether this quote mark was a typo or part of a larger blockquote.
 * Removed.

Of Tolkien's life
Sources again are good. I really like the table and think it fits.
 * Thank you.

...a horrible procrastinator. Perhaps "horrible" can be replaced with another word?
 * Done.

Of creation and sub-creation
Sources are good. Concise, well-written. Also provides enough description to understand the point without overindulgence. Good use of hatnote.
 * Noted.

Surrealistic dream memory
...1939, shortly before the start of the Second World War, when he woke up with the story, "that odd thing", in his mind "virtually" complete. "That odd thing" needs some clarification: is it referencing the story? Otherwise, solid, sources check out. Perhaps another image here as well, like Tolkien with his beloved trees. On further reflection, unneeded.
 * Glossed.

Visual imagery
Source is good, section covers main points.
 * Noted.

Overall
Just some nitpicks that, after being addressed, will surely make the article GA-worthy. I can tell this isn't your first GAN as the article really only had minor issues (also because of the number next to your name).
 * Many thanks! I think that's everything done now. Chiswick Chap (talk) 16:18, 1 August 2023 (UTC)


 * Indeed it is. All's good! 123Writer talk 16:25, 1 August 2023 (UTC)