Talk:Los Arcos Mall/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Jeromi Mikhael (talk · contribs) 07:29, 2 June 2021 (UTC)

I will review this article in a few days. --Regards, Jeromi Mikhael 07:29, 2 June 2021 (UTC)

Infobox

 * Opening date: It would be better if you put both dates in the infobox: October 20, 1969 (anchor store) November 21, 1969 (official)
 * Done
 * Closing date: Similar to the opening date, put both dates in the infobox: 1995 (official) February 1999 (last store)
 * The mall didn't close in 1995, so this is wrong

Lead

 * Explain the meaning of Los Arcos, as mentioned in citation #5. Probably make a new section for the name?
 * Done

Mall history

 * After construction began in October 1968 - source says ceremony marking construction start of the construction's first key building was held on 29 September - probably change it to late September 1968
 * September 29 (Sunday) source says the ceremony is Tuesday (Oct. 1)
 * First paragraph: mention Kitchell Contractors who constructed the center
 * not sure if contractor really belongs in text. This mall had two GCs, one for the anchor stores and one for the remainder of the property.
 * an open-air center - no mention in the citation?
 * Citation added
 * #4 is cited twice for a single chain of sentence - is it necessary?
 * better safe than sorry here, imo


 * Among the inline tenants was a movie theater on the lower level; three out-parcel buildings were built for the two anchors' automotive centers and a First Federal Savings and Loan office. - Note that this sentence's source was made before the building was completed - it would be better if you mention that these were "planned".
 * Changed (though these were all built)
 * 1,000,000-square-foot (93,000 m2)-plus Fiesta Mall - no mention about this in the sources
 * Source added
 * Salt River Pima-Maricopa Indian Community - Indian Community -> Reserve?
 * Not in this case. You might notice that's where the article is.
 * Equity Properties of Chicago - expand to equity properties and development company of chicago
 * Done
 * The Broadway - is this referring to the broadway-hale stores?
 * Yes, the stores themselves were always known as The Broadway though the corporate parent had once been known as Broadway-Hale. (Responses from here up: Sammi Brie  (she/her • t • c) 15:47, 12 June 2021 (UTC))
 * If that's the case then please harmonize the naming for the stores or clarify the relation between the two (e.g. The Broadway (owned by Broadway-Hale) or Broadway-Hale (corporate parent of The Broadway).

Hockey arena proposal

 * but it was not until the end of 1996 that a potential buyer emerged: the Phoenix-based Ellman Companies, - could this sentence be reworded to remove the colon? Colon is not recommended to be used in conjunction with the dash.
 * A year later, Ellman presented three revised plans. One of them was for a $140 million hockey arena to house the Phoenix Coyotes of the National Hockey League, along with proposals for a power center and an updated version of the 1997 concept.[19] The plan including the arena and power center survived[20] and was unveiled to the public on September 28, with a cost of $600 million. - this sentence is kind of confusing. Are the power center and the updated 1997 version part of a single plan or are these separated?
 * Reworded for clarity. Sammi Brie  (she/her • t • c) 19:14, 14 June 2021 (UTC)
 * Clarify the relation between Steve Ellman and The Ellman Companies.
 * Since there are two Ellmans here (Steve Ellman and The Ellman Companies), please replace Ellmans that were referred to with he with Steve Ellman per WP:NCP.
 * Since there are two Ellmans here (Steve Ellman and The Ellman Companies), please replace Ellmans that were referred to with he with Steve Ellman per WP:NCP.
 * Since there are two Ellmans here (Steve Ellman and The Ellman Companies), please replace Ellmans that were referred to with he with Steve Ellman per WP:NCP.

Los Arcos Town Center proposal

 * The collapse of the Los Arcos arena plan put Scottsdale back at the drawing board on plans to reuse the property. - replace Scottsdale with Scottsdale city
 * That January, Ellman, which still owned the property, proposed a shopping center to be anchored by Walmart, Sam's Club, and Lowe's. Since Ellman would be mentioned several more times in this section, please clarify which Ellman in this sentence.
 * councilmembers -> council members
 * It is styled this way in a lot of Arizona municipalities and elsewhere in the US, as a replacement for the gendered "councilman". For instance,
 * under the banner of "STOP 'EM" -> banner is quite ambiguous here. probably under the "STOP 'EM" group?
 * The group seemed a bit loose but it is a "group" per the article.
 * to voters in March 2004 - because this would later be mentioned as the "9 March vote", I think this phrase should be changed to 9 March 2004.
 * "administrative" - no mentions about the "administrative" state of the act in the source, even with apostrophe. Could you point this out?
 * Citation added.
 * "administrative" - no mentions about the "administrative" state of the act in the source, even with apostrophe. Could you point this out?
 * Citation added.
 * Citation added.

SkySong

 * ASU never appears before this section, yet the university was suddenly mentioned here without any background. Is it possible to elaborate a bit on how did ASU get involved in this matter?
 * A source has been added to discuss some of this.
 * In 2004, the city of Scottsdale and the ASU Foundation, the philanthropic arm of Arizona State University, reached a deal: Ellman would sell the land for $41.5 million to the foundation, - Why is Ellman not a part of the deal? How could two parties reach a deal that involves a third party without the third party being involved in the deal. Should it be the city of Scottsdale, the ASU Foundation, and The Ellman Companies?
 * (Paragraph 3) Where is SkySong 2? There is no mention about it.
 * See the last sentence of paragraph 2: the first two office buildings on the property
 * The university maintains offices and a business incubator in the center. - Should it be The foundation instead?
 * The offices are for university units. This isn't the only building the ASU Foundation owns where actual university units occupy office space. Sammi Brie  (she/her • t • c) 17:34, 16 June 2021 (UTC)
 * The offices are for university units. This isn't the only building the ASU Foundation owns where actual university units occupy office space. Sammi Brie  (she/her • t • c) 17:34, 16 June 2021 (UTC)