Talk:Louisa Cadamuro/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Resolute (talk · contribs) 00:28, 2 December 2011 (UTC)


 * GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)


 * 1) It is reasonably well written.
 * a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
 * 1) It is factually accurate and verifiable.
 * a (references): b (citations to reliable sources):  c (OR):
 * 1) It is broad in its coverage.
 * a (major aspects): b (focused):
 * 1) It follows the neutral point of view policy.
 * Fair representation without bias:
 * 1) It is stable.
 * No edit wars, etc.:
 * 1) It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
 * a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:
 * 1) It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
 * a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:


 * General
 * Images good
 * NPOV good
 * Sources good
 * Spotcheck of sources shows no issue with close paraphrasing


 * Personal life
 * "She developed an interest into the sport of football at a young age. Prior to playing the sport of football, Nécib trained in gymnastics." - "sport of football" being used twice in close succession is awkward. I would also think "the sport of" is redundant, since the reader already knows football is a sport. Perhaps "She developed an interest in football at a young age, prior to which she trained in gymnastics"?
 * Done. —  JS   Rant Away 01:02, 2 December 2011 (UTC)


 * Club Career
 * Mostly a nitpick, but the same word is often re-used in close succession, often redundantly. e.g.:
 * "Nécib began her career as a youth player for her hometown club Union Sportive de Marseille.[8] After spending two years at the club, she signed on with nearby club Celtic de Marseille. Nécib spent six months developing in the(ir) club's academy..."
 * Done. —  JS   Rant Away 01:02, 2 December 2011 (UTC)


 * "The initiative to allow women to train at the famous national center came about in the 1990s due to the fact that center (it) had quickly become a high-level training facility for male football players."
 * Done. —  JS   Rant Away 01:02, 2 December 2011 (UTC)


 * There are likely more examples. Not major, but I find it does interrupt the flow.
 * I'll look over the article for more examples. —  JS   Rant Away 01:02, 2 December 2011 (UTC)


 * Probably unrelated to this GAN and won't affect a pass/fail, but I dislike things like "the women's team of professional men's club Toulouse" for two reasons: First, it is already obvious she is playing women's teams. I presume the phrasing is being used because the article links to the men's team article, which brings my second complaint: the link to the men's team article is pretty much irrelevant. I think I would rather see a redlink to something like Toulouse FC (Ladies) or some such.  The women's sides are notable in their own right, and I think deserve articles if they don't already exist.
 * Done. I'll create the Toulouse Ladies article when I get the oppurtunity. —  JS   Rant Away 01:02, 2 December 2011 (UTC)


 * "...she scored two sets of braces in wins over..." - I have no idea what a brace is. Is there an article that potentially unfamiliar terminology like this can be linked to?  I am familiar with the "hat trick", used at the end of the Lyon section, but again, it should be linked for readers not aware of the meaning.
 * Done. Rephrased wording. —  JS   Rant Away 01:02, 2 December 2011 (UTC)


 * "...she scored her first goal for Lyon converting a penalty kick in a 2–0 win against Paris Saint-Germain." - Why is this linked to the men's team instead of Paris Saint-Germain F.C. (Ladies)?
 * Fixed. —  JS   Rant Away 01:02, 2 December 2011 (UTC)


 * Overall
 * This article is almost excessively detailed, but aside from a few nitpicks above, I found it fairly easy to read. The article is certainly comprehensive and focused.  While I would like to see the comments above addressed, I find they are not enough for me to delay promotion.  As such, I am passing the article.  Regards, Resolute 00:28, 2 December 2011 (UTC)
 * Thank you for the review. —  JS   Rant Away 01:02, 2 December 2011 (UTC)