Talk:Lyman Linde/GA1

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.''

Reviewer: Canadian   Paul  19:31, 18 April 2010 (UTC)

I will be reviewing this article in the near future, most likely later tonight. Canadian  Paul  19:31, 18 April 2010 (UTC)

And here it is:


 * GA review (see here for criteria)


 * 1) It is reasonably well written.
 * a (prose): b (MoS):
 * 1) It is factually accurate and verifiable.
 * a (references): b (citations to reliable sources):  c (OR):
 * 1) It is broad in its coverage.
 * a (major aspects): b (focused):
 * 1) It follows the neutral point of view policy.
 * Fair representation without bias:
 * 1) It is stable.
 * No edit wars, etc.:
 * 1) It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
 * a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:
 * 1) It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
 * a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:

Overall, very nice, just a few comments:
 * 1) Under "Early life", the first three sentences use the phrase "high school" four times, which is somewhat distracting. Would it be possible to change one or two of these? For example, I think that the second sentence could work as "While there, he played..." or something similar.
 * 2) Same section, "a couple years" sounds a bit colloquial to me... maybe "several" or "a number of" would sound better? Just my opinion though, so feel free to give it the thumbs down.
 * 3) Regarding the last section, I'm normally hugely against two-sentence paragraphs, let alone two-sentence major sentences, as they disrupt the flow of the article. Unfortunately, if there's no other information out there, then I'm not certain that you can do anything about it, but I'll ask anyways: is there anything that can be done about the incredibly tiny "Later life" section? I'm wondering if even tacking it on to the end of the previous section would be better if there's really nothing else to say... one thing you can do, however, is add a citation to the second sentence.

To allow for these changes to be made I am placing the article on hold for a period of up to a week. I'm always open to discussion on any of the items, so if you think I'm wrong on something leave your thoughts here and we'll discuss. I'll be checking this page at least daily, unless something comes up, so you can be sure I'll notice any comments left here. Canadian  Paul  01:05, 19 April 2010 (UTC)
 * First two points addressed. As for the third, unfortunately, I found absolutely nothing. While there's some on the BR bullpen site, it's a wiki and unreliable, and I could not dig up the information anywhere else. citing the death feels redundant but I'll do so. Wizardman  Operation Big Bear 02:26, 19 April 2010 (UTC)


 * Ah well, that's too bad. I personally think that the information would fit better at the end of the previous section, but I'm not going to hold back a GA based on a small issue of personal opinion, so I'm going to be promoting the article to Good Article status now. Congratulations, thank you for your hard work, and good luck with the remainder of Operation Big Bear (if you need it!). Canadian   Paul  06:02, 19 April 2010 (UTC)