Talk:Marcus Chamat/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 14:49, 11 September 2019 (UTC)

Comments That's about it for a first review, so I'll put the article on hold. The Rambling Man (Staying alive since 2005!) 09:58, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * Odd one this, how do we know the IPA is correct for his name pronunciation?
 * Sadly, this isn't my thing at all. did this one for me at Help talk:IPA/Swedish where he labels some sourcing, but I don't know how you would cite this. Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski  (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * The source for his first name could be any pronunciation dictionary (as far as I know), but I'm not sure how we could source the surname. is the only logical option in my view, I don't know how else I could transcribe what I hear on the recordings. Kbb2 (ex. Mr KEBAB) (talk) 15:12, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * Understood. I only noted it here because I've never known how to say his surname... The Rambling Man (Staying alive since 2005!) 18:40, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * "Despite being only 5' 4" (163 cm) tall, Chamat was nicknamed "Napoleon"" I would say he was called "Napoleon" precisely because of his diminutive stature, not "despite" it.
 * reworded. Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * No need to repeat Chamat four times in four sentences.
 * down to two. Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * " European Pool Championship " our article has this in the plural.
 * ✅ Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * " finishing runner-up on two occasions." twice.
 * ✅ Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * "and would play for the Continent" played.
 * ✅ Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * "as a player" unnecessary.
 * ✅ Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * "Chamat won his first major title in 2000, where he won the nine-ball event at the European Pool Championships where he defeated Ralf Souquet in the final" -> "In 2000, Chamat won his first major title by defeating Ralf Soquet in the final of the nine-ball event at the European Pool Championships."
 * ✅ Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * Do a "would" purge...
 * - I clearly have an obsession. Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * ✅ Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:03, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * "in the eight-ball event at the championships in 2008" -> "in the eight-ball event in 2008, defeating Svilar Zoren in the final 8–3"
 * ✅ Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * Infobox - 8-Ball, 9-Ball, 10-Ball, unnecessary capitals.
 * ✅ Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * " 2004, when he did so at the 2004 WPA World Nine-ball Championship" no need for "when he did so".
 * ✅ Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * Don't overlink Soquet.
 * ✅ Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * "losing in the semi-final to Ralf Souquet" generally when there's no ambiguity, no need to repeat first names after the first full-name instance.
 * ✅ Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * "Chamat played on the International Pool Tour[9] and also appears at the Euro Tour events." odd ref placement, and probably needs an "as of" for his latest Euro Tour appearance.
 * He still appears every now and again... Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * "in 2005. He won this event by defeating " -> "in 2005, defeating "
 * ✅ Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * Where is his "semi-retirement" referenced?
 * added a cite. It doesn't say semi-retirement, but he still plays... so not sure I could source the specific phrase/ Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * "Chamat's sole win in 2002 was referred to as "the best moment of my career"," this is confusing. It was Europe's sole win during Chamat's time with the team, and Davis said "It was one of the best moments of my career" not "the best moment of my career".  I imagine that would have been winning the world snooker championship in 1985 or similar.
 * Well, I don't think Davis particularly enjoyed 1985.... See my new article on the event. I'll reword. Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * I'm sure I meant 1983...!! The Rambling Man (Staying alive since 2005!) 18:45, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * "After not regaining his " -> "After failing to regain his".
 * ✅ Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * "however, Chamat would take over as captain" -> "however, he took over as captain" and is that "non-playing"?
 * ✅ Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * "2015,[16] 2016[17] and 2017 events.[18] " I would move those refs to the end of the sentence.
 * ✅ Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * "In total, Chamat has represented Europe at the event on 10 occasions." this would be better at the end of the Mosconi Cup descriptions, not before the one in 2018.
 * ✅ Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * "In his fourth match" tournament?
 * ✅ Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * ". Chamat, as captain took Filler " comma after captain.
 * ✅ Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * "for Swedish Pool, and" is that some kind of official organisation?
 * reworded Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * " his short height where he stood at 5' 4" (163 cm) tall." perhaps "his diminutive stature, standing at ..."
 * ✅ Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * In "Achievements", no need to continually capitalise Winner.
 * ✅ Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski (talk • contribs) 15:02, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * All done Best Wishes,  Lee Vilenski  (talk • contribs) 15:03, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * , I'll try to be back tonight for a re-visit! The Rambling Man (Staying alive since 2005!) 16:51, 12 September 2019 (UTC)
 * Happy enough, it passes the GA criteria, so promoting. Good work. The Rambling Man (Staying alive since 2005!) 18:47, 12 September 2019 (UTC)