Talk:Mary Cloyd Burnley Stifler

Draft Feedback
Hi

This is such a great start to this article. I've got some feedback for you, mostly concerning tone and other Wikipedia specifics: Will (Wiki Ed) (talk) 23:12, 28 October 2020 (UTC)
 * I removed the citation from the lead you had for her date of birth - usually leads don't contain citations since they're summaries of the body of the article which should contain the same information, except cited
 * For the "Education and Career" section, in the second paragraph, I would remove "Perhaps most notably" due to its sounding like a personal opinion. The sentence (and her achievement) stand well on its own
 * A few references appear to have broken parts to them. I am happy to help you update them if you need any assistance doing that
 * This looks really, really great. I think it's ready to move live once you incorporate these changes! Really excellent work!

Will (Wiki Ed),

Thanks for the feedback. I'll get the changes made before our meeting today at 4:00. I took the training on moving a page but I wonder if the "move" function is disabled since I'm in this course. If you want to walk us through the steps using this article, that's fine.

saintvip (talk) 10:58, 29 October 2020 (UTC)