Talk:Massey Poyntz/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Sahara4u (talk · contribs) 11:33, 15 November 2012 (UTC)

Lede

 * Any image for the lede?
 * Unfortunately not at the moment. There is nothing online, and although I do have a photo of him in a book, I can't get a decent scan of it at the moment. I intend to get one eventually though!  Harrias  talk 13:38, 15 November 2012 (UTC)


 * “….was an English cricketer” → “was an English First-class cricketer” or simply “First-class cricketer”
 * Added first-class.  Harrias  talk 13:38, 15 November 2012 (UTC)


 * Link right-handed batsman
 * Linked batsman to Batting (cricket).  Harrias  talk 13:38, 15 November 2012 (UTC)


 * “.…….against Cambridge University in 1919.” “the” before Cambridge University, since you have linked it to cricket club. There may be others…..
 * I disagree, that would make the sentence grammatically poor. Although it is linked to the cricket club, the way the sentence itself is phrased is perfectly acceptable.  Harrias  talk 13:38, 15 November 2012 (UTC)


 * Could you please rephrase the last sentence of the 2nd para?
 * I can, but could you clarify what your problem with it is?  Harrias  talk 13:38, 15 November 2012 (UTC)
 * Last two sentences start with "After ...ing". It would be better if you avoid to repeat the same. Zia Khan 15:35, 15 November 2012 (UTC)
 * Tweaked it. How's that?  Harrias  talk 15:42, 15 November 2012 (UTC)
 * Looks good now. Zia Khan 16:23, 15 November 2012 (UTC)

Early life and career

 * “…followed his older brother Hugh into the Somerset side.[6]” → could you mention his full name?
 * As in "Hugh Poyntz", or "Hugh Stainton Poyntz"? I don't really see the need in either case: he only had one brother named Hugh, so there is no need to include the middle name to disambiguate, and I have linked to his article anyway. It is reasonable to assume that he will have the same surname, so including that is superfluous.  Harrias  talk 13:38, 15 November 2012 (UTC)

County captain

 * “……scoring 50 runs exactly in the second innings of a match against Middlesex at Bath.[16]” No need of “exactly” and put “the” before Bath.
 * Removed "exactly", but given that Bath is a city, it would be grammatically incorrect to put "the" before it.  Harrias  talk 13:38, 15 November 2012 (UTC)


 * “…against Hampshire at Bath.[20]” Same as above
 * As above.  Harrias  talk 13:38, 15 November 2012 (UTC)


 * A link to “bowling average”
 * Linked.  Harrias  talk 13:38, 15 November 2012 (UTC)


 * “….and he scored three half-centuries.” → “and scored three half-centuries.”
 * Removed "he".  Harrias  talk 13:38, 15 November 2012 (UTC)

Wartime career and later life

 * “..Poyntz was appointed to the 3rd Battalion, Bedfordshire Regiment.[29] → “third”, same for the 2nd in the next sentence
 * Military units are always referred to in this format: see Category:Battalions of the British Army.  Harrias  talk 13:38, 15 November 2012 (UTC)


 * “averaging 10.00 from his three innings.” → no need of “his”
 * Removed "his".  Harrias  talk 13:38, 15 November 2012 (UTC)

Overall, the article looks good and informative. I'll take another look once the above concerns addressed. Zia Khan 11:33, 15 November 2012 (UTC)
 * Thanks for your review: I have responded to your comments, and look forward to any further points you might have.  Harrias  talk 13:38, 15 November 2012 (UTC)

Final review

 * GA review (see Good article criteria and WP:GACN)


 * 1) Well written.
 * a (clear and concise prose which doesn't violate copyright laws, grammar and spelling are correct): b ''(MoS for lead, layout, word choice, and fiction:
 * 1) Factually accurate and verifiable.
 * a (well-referenced): b (citations to reliable sources):  c (No original research):
 * 1) Broad in its coverage.
 * a (covers major aspects): b (well-focused):
 * 1) Neutral .
 * Fair representation, no bias:
 * 1) Stable.
 * No edit wars nor disputed contents:
 * 1) Illustrated appropriately by images.
 * No image
 * 1) Conclusion: Good work with the article, passes GA criteria. Zia Khan 16:23, 15 November 2012 (UTC)
 * Pass/Fail:
 * 1) Illustrated appropriately by images.
 * No image
 * 1) Conclusion: Good work with the article, passes GA criteria. Zia Khan 16:23, 15 November 2012 (UTC)
 * Pass/Fail:
 * 1) Conclusion: Good work with the article, passes GA criteria. Zia Khan 16:23, 15 November 2012 (UTC)
 * Pass/Fail: