Talk:Max Bentley/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Crisco 1492 09:45, 25 September 2011 (UTC)


 * I will conduct this review in a few steps. Disclosure: I have previously reviewed this for DYK.


 * Parapharasing: Seems okay (1, 2, 3)
 * 1A
 * I've done some rather minor copyedits and left a couple of comments. Feedback is appreciated.
 * I'm less than pleased with "The trio were joined in Drumheller by Doug and Reg for the 1938–39 season and the family operated a gas station in town when not playing hockey" as the two are unrelated (more or less). Two separate sentences would be better.
 * "when he joined the Canadian Infantry Corps during World War II" -- Since World War II is already in the above paragraph, shouldn't it be dropped from this one?
 * "Three weeks later, six games into the season, the Maple Leafs completed a deal to acquire Bentley" --> "Three weeks and six games into the season later, the Maple Leafs completed a deal to acquire Bentley"?
 * "Three weeks later, six games into the season, the Maple Leafs completed a deal to acquire Bentley. He was sent to Toronto with Cy Thomas in exchange for Gus Bodnar, Bud Poile, Gaye Stewart, Ernie Dickens and Bob Goldham, on November 2, 1947." --> I'd put this at the beginning of the Maple Leafs section


 * 3A
 * "tying the league record for points in one game with seven" - Is it still the record? If so, that should be stated.
 * Personal life. Married? With whom? How many children?


 * 6
 * Any chance of finding extra images, perhaps the teams from a certain year or the arenas he played in? I took a look for free images of the man himself, and could find nothing.


 * Unrelated to the article: Seems Montreal didn't forgive him for beating them. That is a very cold title... "Max Bentley is dead, was artist with puck". Oh, The Hockey Sweater strikes again...


 * Summary: Just a few touch ups. Crisco 1492 (talk) 11:20, 25 September 2011 (UTC)
 * Appreciate the review! I have fixed all of the technical issues you identified.  Finally found a RS with his wife's name, but cannot find anything indicating how many children they had overall, only that his one son was a pro player. (Frustratingly, the Saskatoon Star-Phoenix is the only Western Canadian paper the local library doesn't have microfilm archives of, so I couldn't even find a proper obituary for that info).  The timing of his career makes free images very tough to find.  Unless an image that is specifically from 1947-48 in Toronto can be found, almost everything would have to be assumed to be under copyright.  There is a very, very slim chance that a photograph from the Drumheller Miners might be contained in the collection on the walls of the Stampede Corral in Calgary, but it would be some time before I could even go check on that. Resolute 16:17, 25 September 2011 (UTC)
 * Did you get a chance to see the hidden text comments I made? There are a couple suggestions there. Crisco 1492 (talk) 23:09, 25 September 2011 (UTC)
 * I hadn't, thanks for the reminder. I've changed a few, but left most alone.  If you have a question on any change or not change, let me know! Thanks, Resolute 15:24, 26 September 2011 (UTC)
 * I am assuming that you don't have an RS for Bev's full name (just curious, as I never knew Bev was a unisex name). Looks good to me. I am happy to pass this nomination. Crisco 1492 (talk) 23:19, 26 September 2011 (UTC)
 * Nope. Near as I can tell, Bev really was his name. Even his Hockeydb profile lists his name as just "Bev".  Thanks again for the review. Resolute 23:39, 26 September 2011 (UTC)