Talk:Mia Hamm/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Casliber (talk · contribs) 03:28, 31 May 2017 (UTC)

I'll take a look at this and copyedit as I go (please revert if I accidentally change the meaning), and jot queries below. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 03:28, 31 May 2017 (UTC)


 * All four paras in lead start with (±Mia) Hamm.. - try to mix things up a little.
 * Updated. Hmlarson (talk) 01:24, 3 June 2017 (UTC)


 *  Soon her whole family became very involved in the sport - "very" unnecessary
 * Updated. Hmlarson (talk) 01:24, 3 June 2017 (UTC)


 *  Hamm played sports beginning at a very young age - scans oddly, why not just, "Hamm played sports from a (very) young age". I'd also ditch the "very" as comes across as laboured and redundant.
 * Updated. Hmlarson (talk) 01:24, 3 June 2017 (UTC)


 *  North Carolina only lost one game in the ninety five she played on the team - I'd say "of" not "in" here.
 * Updated. Hmlarson (talk) 01:24, 3 June 2017 (UTC)


 *  there was no fully professional women's soccer league in the United States - is the word "fully" needed here? was the predecessor league part professional or amateur?
 * Updated. Hmlarson (talk) 01:24, 3 June 2017 (UTC)


 * It'd be good if we could add anything to the Washington Freedom, 2001–03 section to buff it up a bit. Also, try to figure a way to avoid having a one sentence paragraph...
 * Expanded. Hmlarson (talk) 20:52, 18 June 2017 (UTC)


 * The Endorsements section is slim. Anything about how much the endorsements were for or anything else to buff the section would be good.
 * Expanded and moved under In Popular Culture header. Hmlarson (talk) 20:52, 18 June 2017 (UTC)


 * You mention Garret Hamm and aplastic anemia in two separate sections, if this could be rationalised somehow to reduce repetition that would be good.
 * Updated. Hmlarson (talk) 01:24, 3 June 2017 (UTC)


 * It would be good to use the Burke biography as an inline ref - e.g. on page 28 it says Garret died after 10 years of the disease.
 * Updated. Hmlarson (talk) 01:24, 3 June 2017 (UTC)


 * In fact, I'd dispense with the further reading section - these books should either be the source of content or dropped.
 * Updated.Hmlarson (talk) 06:34, 3 June 2017 (UTC)


 * Web references should all have accessdate, date, author etc. Some are link only. And there is at least one deadlink.
 * Updated.Hmlarson (talk) 06:34, 3 June 2017 (UTC)

Overall, looks good. Am trying to give it a big a shove as possible towards FAC. It'd be great to get this on the mainpage. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 09:53, 31 May 2017 (UTC)

In Progress
Hmlarson (talk) 06:47, 3 June 2017 (UTC)
 * expand 1996 Atlanta Olympics
 * expand 1999 FIFA Women's World Cup
 * expand 2003 FIFA Women's World Cup
 * expand 2004 Olympics
 * expand Washington Freedom
 * expand Endorsements
 * In popular culture section?
 * review honors and awards

I'm done with this round of updates if you are able to take a look. Thank you. Hmlarson (talk) 21:11, 18 June 2017 (UTC)

1. Well written?:
 * Prose quality:
 * Manual of Style compliance:

2. Factually accurate and verifiable?:
 * References to sources:
 * Citations to reliable sources, where required:
 * No original research:

3. Broad in coverage?:
 * Major aspects:
 * Focused:

4. Reflects a neutral point of view?:
 * Fair representation without bias:

5. Reasonably stable?
 * No edit wars, etc. (Vandalism does not count against GA):

6. Illustrated by images, when possible and appropriate?:
 * Images are copyright tagged, and non-free images have fair use rationales:
 * Images are provided where possible and appropriate, with suitable captions:

Overall:
 * Pass or Fail: - great, well done. I feel it is within striking distance of FA-hood, if you want to take it to FAC. Only slight quibble is I feel the photo of her taking the corner would be better for the infobox but it's not a big deal...just a great photo. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 09:34, 19 June 2017 (UTC)
 * Thanks for reviewing . I've swapped a couple photos and added another quote. I'll see about FAC. Hmlarson (talk) 17:05, 19 June 2017 (UTC)