Talk:Minnie Pwerle/GA1

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.''

Reviewer: Beloved  Freak  22:06, 14 July 2010 (UTC)

Personal life
 * "It is part of a broader region, containing about 20 Indigenous outstations and centred on the Sandover River, known as the Sandover." - I'm not 100% clear; it the river known as the Sandover, or the region. (I'm presuming the region, but perhaps the sentence could be rearranged sightly to avoid ambiguity?)
 * Yeah, that was ugly. I remember wrestling with that sentence, but i just fixed it (I think!) quite easily. Don't know why I had found it so difficult. hamiltonstone (talk) 23:59, 14 July 2010 (UTC)


 * "McCulloch's Encyclopedia suggests around 1922" - is this part of the title (and therefore should it be in italics?) Or, if not, should encyclopedia have a lower-case "e"?
 * Changed to full title. hamiltonstone (talk) 23:54, 14 July 2010 (UTC)

Artistic career
 * Any reason for the inconsistency of "50" and "eighty-eight"?
 * Think this was a hang-over from when a sentence actually began "Eighty-eight". Fixed now. hamiltonstone (talk) 23:54, 14 July 2010 (UTC)


 * Central Australian Aboriginal Media Association could be linked (although admittedly there's not much there)
 * Done. hamiltonstone (talk) 23:57, 14 July 2010 (UTC)


 * "they do not state whether Minnie was a textile artist before she took up the brush" - doesn't "whether" need an "or not" here? (as in, "whether or not Minnie was a textile artist") I'm unsure of this, and google was no help, but that's just what I thought...
 * Probably I was subconsciously avoiding having "not" twice in a phrase, but you are correct, and I have inserted that. hamiltonstone (talk) 23:57, 14 July 2010 (UTC)


 * Will carry this on tomorrow, getting too tired!-- Beloved Freak  23:20, 14 July 2010 (UTC)
 * OK! hamiltonstone (talk) 23:59, 14 July 2010 (UTC)

Right:
 * "Minnie was one of the Utopia artists whose style was "radically different from all the other painting communities in the Western Desert..."" - I think this would be better with attribution in the text, saying who or where the quote is from.
 * Done. hamiltonstone (talk) 23:41, 15 July 2010 (UTC)


 * "Questions were raised about whether she was pressured to paint by others, and whether some of the vast number of paintings traded under her name were created by her at all." - is there any more info on this? Who raised the questions, was there any legal action or anything? (I am presuming for things like this that you've added what you can as you are thorough in your use of sources. Just checking though!)
 * Reasonable question. The two currently-cited sources have the following: "One of Mbantua's artists, the late Minnie Pwerle, is often cited as someone whose works are open to forgery." (Lacey) "One shop in Todd Mall, the main street in Alice Springs, displays what it claims are works by a Utopia artist, Minnie Pwerle, in its front window. They are fakes. Since Minnie died last year, her paintings have shot up in value, prompting a thriving trade in copies. "Minnie must still be painting in heaven, judging by the number of new Minnies around," says one Sydney dealer. Inside the gallery, the owner produces "certificates of authenticity" for the Minnie paintings. They are meaningless documents, easily forged. Asked what year the works were painted, she shrugs. "We don't worry about that sort of thing," she says. Some in the art world believe Minnie's work may end up fetching as much as Emily's. Both women started painting at a very advanced age. A few years ago an urban dealer tried to abduct Minnie, in order to get her to paint for him. Her daughter, Barbara Weir, also a highly successful artist, found the pair at Alice Springs airport." (Marks) I have resolved the issue at present by changing the sentence to: "In addition to being pressured to paint by others, there were media reports suggesting that some of the vast number of paintings traded under Minnie's name were not created by her at all." hamiltonstone (talk) 23:41, 15 July 2010 (UTC)
 * That's absolutely fine. Might be a point worth expanding on at some point if there is available material.-- Beloved Freak  12:34, 16 July 2010 (UTC)

Style of painting
 * "the Awelye Atnwengerrp dreamings (or Women's Dreaming)" - is Women's Dreaming another term for the Awelye Atnwengerrp dreamings? If so, is it correct that one is plural and the other not?
 * Don't know why I had that "s" there - gone. hamiltonstone (talk) 23:50, 15 July 2010 (UTC)


 * Is "gestural abstractionism" the same as Action painting? (Gestural abstraction currently links there. If so, could you wikilink it and redirect to action painting?
 * I've put in the link, though i'm wondering if Green quite meant that. Still, Pollock was an "action painter", and his work has been likened to Tony Tuckson's, which has been likened to Emily Kngwarreye's, which is closely related to Minnie's... so q.e.d. i guess :-). hamiltonstone (talk) 23:50, 15 July 2010 (UTC)


 * "Minnie's paintings include two main design themes ... The second are circular shapes..." - should this be "the second is"?
 * Yes, but "is" sounded wrong, so i tried another work around: "The second theme involves circular shapes..."

Legacy
 * "Described ... as "a genius", Minnie's paintings were..." - is this right? Were her paintings described as "a genius", or her?
 * Indeed. Tweaked. hamiltonstone (talk) 23:59, 15 July 2010 (UTC)

References
 * Does the first reference (Toohey) need an accessdate? Or does it not because it's a PDF or something?
 * No, access date added. hamiltonstone (talk) 23:59, 15 July 2010 (UTC)


 * Consider adding publisher details to your news sources
 * I've never seen this done - the newspaper is usually regarded as sufficient - or did you mean in some other context? hamiltonstone (talk) 23:59, 15 July 2010 (UTC)
 * This is just something I've picked up from other editors; I thought that we should generally add as much info as we have on sources. I know you're very experienced with FAC reviews, so I'll take your word for it! -- Beloved Freak  12:34, 16 July 2010 (UTC)


 * ABC News can be wikilinked and shouldn't be in italics
 * Done. hamiltonstone (talk) 23:59, 15 July 2010 (UTC)

General
 * Consider adding the persondata template.
 * Done. hamiltonstone (talk) 00:05, 16 July 2010 (UTC)
 * GA review (see here for criteria)


 * 1) It is reasonably well written.
 * a (prose): b (MoS):
 * 1) It is factually accurate and verifiable.
 * a (references): b (citations to reliable sources):  c (OR):
 * 1) It is broad in its coverage.
 * a (major aspects): b (focused):
 * 1) It follows the neutral point of view policy.
 * Fair representation without bias:
 * 1) It is stable.
 * No edit wars, etc.:
 * 1) It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
 * a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:
 * 1) It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
 * a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:
 * 1) Overall:
 * Pass/Fail:

This is pretty much there. I'll put the article on hold, but I'm only really concerned about the grammar points mentioned for the "Style of painting" and "Legacy" sections. Everything else you can take or leave as you like. Another great article on an interesting and important topic.-- Beloved Freak  11:03, 15 July 2010 (UTC)

Ok, thanks for making those changes. I'll list the article as a GA now. Well done, and good luck with getting it to FA.-- Beloved Freak  12:34, 16 July 2010 (UTC)