Talk:Mount Eerie (album)/GA1

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.''

Reviewer: Wetrorave (talk · contribs) 18:56, 17 June 2021 (UTC)

This reminds me that I need to listen to some Elverum recordI'm getting into underground/experimental after I've listened to the Caretaker's Everywhere at the End of Time and this guy's A Crow Looked at Me seems just as emotional as Kirby's series.
 * I would check out It Was Hot, We Stayed in the Water then The Glow Pt. 2, and Mount Eerie in release order. They are each amazing albums and do connect in some ways. EATEOT freaks me out a bit too much I think! Also, I still haven't gotten around to hearing A Crow Looked at Memaybe too sad for me but I've heard great things! Mcguy15  (talk, contribs) 20:30, 17 June 2021 (UTC)
 * Yeah, EATEOT is a hard (and extremely long) listen but does have an incredible emotional reward in the last five minutes. Maybe that's why my GA nomination of it has been unanswered for nearly two months noweven the article for the album is long. I also though that A Crow may be too sad for a second but I think I'll do well. Ambient music in general is a genre I'm really getting into, and I heard that GY!BE has some ambient elements. Wetrorave (talk) 21:22, 17 June 2021 (UTC)
 * GY!BE is pretty darn great. It's not entirely ambient, but Virgins by Tim Hecker is one of my favourite albums of all time and has a decent amount of ambient / drone. Mcguy15  (talk, contribs) 01:11, 18 June 2021 (UTC)

Infobox and lead

 * "by American band" > "by American rock band"
 * "is named after Mount Erie" > "is named after the mountain Mount Erie"
 * "including receiving" > "including accolades such as" to avoid repetition of 'receive'
 * "has been described by Elverum as being about "[mountains, earth and space]"." - why does the quote need square brackets
 * "The Glow Pt. 2, the" > "The Glow Pt. 2 (2001), the"
 * "After it's release" > "After its release"
 * Experimental rock is mentioned in the infobox but not in the textexperimental is acceptable only if the album marks a radical departure from the authors' past discography
 * All above ✅ Mcguy15  (talk, contribs) 19:39, 17 June 2021 (UTC)

Background and recording

 * Move the image to the right side of the page in order to avoid sandwiching of text on 4:3 screens
 * The only way I could think to fix this without having the chart img 2 sections down was to move the Alternative cover to the Release section, making the infobox shorter and preventing sandwiching. Mcguy15  (talk, contribs) 19:55, 17 June 2021 (UTC)
 * Image's caption: add "Pictured:" in the beginning
 * "named after Mount Erie" > "is named after the mountain Mount Erie" like in the lead
 * "As Elverum explains," > "Elverum explained that"
 * "concludes The Glow Pt. 2" > "concludes The Glow Pt. 2 (2001)" like in the lead
 * ""My Warm Blood"[7] using" > ""My Warm Blood",[7] using" with the comma
 * "that concludes "My Warm Blood"" > "found in the conclusion of that song" to avoid repetition of the song's name
 * "the heat, the presence of the sun, and the "menacing" atmosphere" > "the state's 'menacing' atmosphere" for quicker readability, + wikilink Florida to Florida
 * "the soundtrack of Black Orpheus" > "the soundtrack of the Brazilian film Black Orpheus (1959)"
 * "further 2 charts" > "further two charts"
 * Why the hyphen on "late-2001"?
 * All above ✅ Mcguy15  (talk, contribs) 19:55, 17 June 2021 (UTC)

Music and themes

 * Remove the first paragraph and add it somewhere else as an explanatory note
 * "concept album[2][9][10][11]" - this is citation overkill, remove the least reliable ref + add a comma after "concept album" for the purposes of the next point
 * "and portrays" > "portraying"
 * Remove the Mount Erie wikilink as it has been already linked before
 * "It has been interpreted" > "Adam Dlugacz of PopMatters interpreted"
 * ""heart-like pulse" [...] described the [1] drums" - move ""heart-like pulse"" to [1]
 * ❌ He calls the drums as a whole having a "heart-like pulse", but the drums "running across the stereo channels" are separate and don't last the entire time. Mcguy15  (talk, contribs) 20:14, 17 June 2021 (UTC)
 * "timestamps 0:00 to 4:57" > "the track's first five minutes"
 * "the section from 4:57 to 10:42" > "the rest"
 * It would be misleading to say "the rest" because the track goes on for another 7 minutes. Mcguy15  (talk, contribs) 20:14, 17 June 2021 (UTC)
 * "the personification of Death" > "a personification of Death"
 * "the liner notes written" > "the liner notes written" with the ln wikilink
 * All above ✅ Mcguy15  (talk, contribs) 20:14, 17 June 2021 (UTC)

Release

 * "material for Dawn." > "material for Dawn (2008)."
 * "including Mount Eerie, due to" - why is the comma like that
 * All above ✅ Mcguy15  (talk, contribs) 20:30, 17 June 2021 (UTC)

Reception

 * "aggregate Metacritic." > "aggregate Metacritic, indicating "generally favorable reviews"."
 * I feel like this wording unnecessarily reiterates the opening line of "Mount Eerie received generally positive reviews from critics". Open to move the metacritic mention to another sentence though, thoughts? Mcguy15  (talk, contribs) 20:30, 17 June 2021 (UTC)
 * "Phares of Allmusic" > "Phares of AllMusic"
 * ✅ Mcguy15  (talk, contribs) 20:30, 17 June 2021 (UTC)

Expansion
Add the source code of the following quote to the source code of the page (without the blockquote template, of course), after Adam Duglacz' opinion: "Stylus Magazine's Ed Howard wrote that Mount Eerie makes listeners 'get to travel with him [Elverum] into the uncharted next ocean of Microphones territory.' A guest writer of Tiny Mix Tapes, who gave the album a perfect score, felt that 'Elvrum on record is the same Elvrum in reality', and that 'it's nice to know that Elvrum is lucid on both sides.'"

And, at the source code of the Album ratings template, change "rev4Score = B " to "rev4Score  = B "


 * ✅ Thank you! Mcguy15  (talk, contribs) 20:30, 17 June 2021 (UTC)

Track listing

 * Good

Personnel
Add a refe.g. "Adapted from liner notes.22" using the template that is wikilinked in the number of the ref example I've given
 * ✅ Mcguy15  (talk, contribs) 20:30, 17 June 2021 (UTC)

Release history

 * Good

Overall
until issues are fixed; I see that you needed an expansion at the Reception section, so I did it here, as a way to help ya. I'm not sure if the article's broad enough but again, I'm not that much of an Elverum fan. Wetrorave (talk) 18:56, 17 June 2021 (UTC)
 * Thanks so much for the review! Everything should be done now, unless you disagree on some of the changes I didn't do. In terms of broadness, if you have concerns, feel free to air them. I'm not against adding / expanding sections before you approve.  Mcguy15  (talk, contribs) 20:48, 17 June 2021 (UTC)
 * Seems overall good now. After a Google search I think this article is broad as well, and the things you didn't do are totally reasonable, so yeah. Congrats on your work, and ✅ this one. Wetrorave (talk) 21:17, 17 June 2021 (UTC)
 * Thanks so much :D Mcguy15  (talk, contribs) 21:33, 17 June 2021 (UTC)
 * It doesn't actually seem like the bot is gonna put the  template, so I'll do it. Wetrorave (talk) 23:58, 17 June 2021 (UTC)