Talk:New-school hip hop/GA1

GA Review
This review is transcluded from Talk:New school hip hop/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Hello. I'll be performing the GA review for this article. Here are some suggestions for improvement: That's it. The article will be on hold for seven days to allow for improvements. Nikki 311  23:05, 30 June 2008 (UTC)
 * Try to avoid using the word "would" before a verb, except in special circumstances. It makes the text too passive. Instead, remove would and make the verb past tense. For example: "By 1986 their releases would begin to establish the hip hop album as a fixture of the mainstream." --> "By 1986 their releases began to establish the hip hop album as a fixture of the mainstream."
 * This is mandatory by any means, but can there be a picture in the top-right corner of the article? Most users are used to seeing an infobox/picture in that corner anyway, and it kind of stands out when there isn't something there. Maybe a free-use image of one of the performers mentioned in the article?
 * didn't --> did not - avoid contractions in the text unless it is part of a quote
 * "Kool Moe Dee's infamous verbal personal attacks" - remove infamous per words to avoid at WP:PEACOCK
 * "and perhaps her greatest record, "Have a Nice Day" (1987)." - too point of view
 * Several of the references in the endnotes need to be combined. For example: 19 and 20; 43 and 44
 * Web citations need to include an access date.
 * has been blocked for one week for trolling and WP:POINT violations. Nishkid64 (Make articles, not wikidrama) 00:33, 1 July 2008 (UTC)
 * Normal service has been resumed. Thanks so much, Nikki, I'll be acting on those suggestions within a couple of days at most. 86.44.16.82 (talk) 23:12, 1 July 2008 (UTC)
 * Alright. I'm glad to see everything was worked out. Nikki  311  03:47, 3 July 2008 (UTC)

Eóin has acted almost all of these suggestions, except one: as i said to him elsewhere, "i am kiiiind of wedded to the 'perhaps her greatest record', it's supported by sources, breaks up and helps make flow a chronological list-sentence, and is good info." The source I am adding for this (Shapiro) unequivocally calls it "her greatest record", is that enough to support us saying perhaps her greatest record? I don't mind if we have to lose it. I'm loathe to qualify it or quote and attribute it as it will break up the sentence, which i think works now.

I've thought about the image or template options myself in the past. I know the image I would like to have there: http://homepage.eircom.net/~spinningcat/adidas1.jpg. I'm sure I have read that this is the first appearance of the iconic Run-DMC logo, and I think I have read that that logo is the first rap group logo (as opposed to one-off fonts for record covers). But I guess I'd have to track down those sources before its use could be justified as a non-free image. Although it is the first single from Raising Hell, the album that made hip hop mainstream ... ? 86.44.16.82 (talk) 09:11, 4 July 2008 (UTC)
 * I think keeping "her greatest record" is okay now that it is sourced with a couple of people saying it. Let me know when you are ready for me to do a final read-through.  Nikki  311  18:46, 4 July 2008 (UTC)
 * Okay, have at it! :) I'm more interested in acting on your suggestions and improving the article than I am in the GA tag per se, in any case. :) 86.44.21.238 (talk) 23:08, 6 July 2008 (UTC)
 * That's a good attitude to have. Everything looks good enough to me, so I've passed the article. Nikki  311  22:43, 7 July 2008 (UTC)