Talk:Nintendo 2DS/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Samwalton9 (talk · contribs) 23:57, 8 November 2013 (UTC)

I'll be happy to review this article and should have time to be done with it over this weekend. From a cursory read through it appears that there are a few issues I would raise but I'll expand on them. As a side note this is my first GA review but I have a fair amount of editing and article creation experience. Samwalton9 (talk) 23:57, 8 November 2013 (UTC)

First look
I was going to look through the article in detail over the weekend but I have a few large concerns about the article currently:
 * Lack of post-release reception - The pre-release section seems good, even if it could maybe be reduced a little, but there is no mention of post-release reviews which is a fairly large omission.
 * UK centred sales section - From a quick search I'm not sure how much coverage of the console's sales there are outside of the UK, but some US sales figures, for example, would definitely add to this section.
 * Images - Not sure right now exactly what kind of images would be suitable but it would be good to see one or two more than are currently present.
 * Software and Services - This section has just 2 sources, at the end, and should really be sourced throughout. The main articles for each subheading should be able to provide sufficient sources.

Having identified these issues I'm going to put the review on hold for now. Samwalton9 (talk) 00:20, 9 November 2013 (UTC)


 * Thank you for your review. Like you pointed out, the lack of a post-release section was a pretty large absence since the product has already been released. The lack of references on the Software and services section was also problematic. I have since added the post-release section and said references, and as such I'd like to get your feedback about them.


 * As for the images, I might ask for help in the article's talk page since I'm not sure what should be added to the article either. Finally, about the sales section. I'm aware that the section is too UK-centered but there are no available numbers for other regions other than VGChartz, which is not a reliable source. I don't know what can be done about this.-- Arkhandar  ( Talk • Contribs ) 15:33, 9 November 2013 (UTC)


 * The post-release section looks pretty good now! I'll be looking into it in greater detail as I go through the article review so shall get back to you on specifics. Images aren't such a big deal to be honest, and I wouldn't fail the GA review based on only having 2/3, as I said I'm not actually certain right now what sort of images would even be suitable to add. I'm going to start looking through in detail this evening so watch this space :) Samwalton9 (talk) 20:44, 9 November 2013 (UTC)


 * Thank you. I fixed some minor things and added an image of my 2DS carrying case along with a sub-section dedicated to them, since there was only one minor mention of the cases in the whole article. I hope it's okay. Once again, thank you for you support and good luck on your first review :) -- Arkhandar ( Talk • Contribs ) 21:15, 9 November 2013 (UTC)

Lead
General:
 * As per WP:LEADCITE the lead section is better off without inline citations if they back the same information up elsewhere in the article so I'd remove/move the citations currently there (most are found elsewhere and the others can be moved).
 * I gave the section a general copyedit.

Specific:
 * "It is intended for a different audience than the 3DS, in particular younger children and concerned gamers." - What is meant by concerned gamers? This could do with clarification.
 * The second paragraph should also contain a brief mention of the post-release reviews as it only mentions some pre-release (I think).

History
General:
 * Some of the section is still written in future tense (will rather than is)

Specific:
 * US price only is enough of a comparison as this is the price mentioned by sources, the UK price is unnecessary.
 * Price does not need to be mentioned in Launch as per WP:NOTCATALOG #5.
 * That it ships with an AC adapter is fairly trivial.
 * "European/Australian/New Zealand" -> "European, Australian, and New Zealand" reads better.
 * The Nintendo Experience promotional tour paragraph could do with a secondary source or removal as it reads as slightly too promotional without evidence of notability of said tour.

Hardware

 * I gave this section a minor copyedit.
 * Opening sentence is a bit too technical. Maybe just say that it retains the same GPU/CPU and other specifications or something to that effect.
 * This source might be worth adding for the single screen information.
 * Carrying Case section - Though I appreciate you added another image I'm not sure how much this section adds to the readers understanding of the article. The carry case only receives passing mentions in sources, and though it could probably receive a one sentence mention in the Hardware section, I don't think it warrants a full subsection paragraph. This is a good example of a) a source covering it and b) the level of mention it requires. The image is good, though!

I'll carry on with this this evening or tomorrow hopefully. Samwalton9 (talk) 21:38, 9 November 2013 (UTC)


 * I'm adding a table to help us keep track on what still needs to be resolved. I hope you don't mind :) -- Arkhandar ( Talk • Contribs ) 01:08, 10 November 2013 (UTC)
 * No problem but I'll leave it to you to fill if you don't mind! Sorry I haven't been doing this the past few days, have time to do it again now. Samwalton9 (talk) 22:56, 14 November 2013 (UTC)

Software and services

 * Almost the entire section is primary sources. Would be better if there was at least one or two secondary reliable sources per paragraph.
 * " Mii Maker, which allows users create Mii characters" needs a copyedit.
 * The first paragraph of User Interface is almost a direct copy from Nintendo 3DS. I'm torn about the whole section actually because though the information is relevant to the 2DS, it's all contained within the 3DS article near verbatim regardless of how you word it. should also really be used for actual articles rather than article sections.

I'm going to ask some other editors about the Software and Services section and get back to you on it. Reception is going to take a little while so I'll carry on with that over the weekend. Samwalton9 (talk) 22:56, 14 November 2013 (UTC)

Software and services

 * Firstly sorry for the delay with this, university work caught up with me over the past week. I posted on WP:VG about this section and Sergecross73's comments reflect my own thoughts. There's simply too much content here which can be found identically in the 3DS article and I agree that trimming the section down drastically to maybe a single paragraph which talks about the 2DS specific notable aspects would be a good idea; I'm thinking things like being able to play 3DS games and retaining most of the 3DS' functionality mostly, with a 'Main article' link to the software and services section of the 3DS article. As before, try to find some secondary sources for this section, you might even turn up some information that should be included here that isn't.

Reception

 * This is largely a surface level overview as I think fairly substantial changes are required.

Pre-release

 * The section over quotes; you should try to summarise what sources have said rather than writing "X said, Y said, Z said..."
 * The first two paragraphs sit awkwardly with the rest; though the second is positive there is no general consensus of what critics responded positively to would be good to include here, similar to the negatives paragraph (albeit revised as above).
 * The section also needs reading through carefully to make sure the right tense is being used - some of it still reads as though the 2DS hasn't been released yet.

Post-release

 * Again this section suffers from some over-quotation, and reducing the amount of direct quotes used would be much better.

Sales

 * "Sales of the Nintendo 2DS surged three weeks after launching in the United Kingdom, with retailers cutting on its price." - It's not clear whether retailers cut the price before or after the surge.
 * This (published today) is probably worth including in the section, if only as a single sentence.
 * Worth also mentioning that some retailers stopped selling the device after poor sales prior to the price cut:


 * {| class="wikitable sortable"

! Section ! Problem ! Resolved ! rowspan="3"| Lead ! rowspan="6"| History ! rowspan="2"| Hardware ! Carrying Case ! rowspan="4"| Software and services ! rowspan="3"| Pre-release ! Post-release ! rowspan="3"| Sales
 * + GA Nomination - Article issues
 * As per WP:LEADCITE the lead section is better off without inline citations.
 * "It is intended for a different audience than the 3DS, in particular younger children and concerned gamers."
 * The second paragraph should also contain a brief mention of the post-release reviews as it only mentions some pre-release.
 * "It is intended for a different audience than the 3DS, in particular younger children and concerned gamers."
 * The second paragraph should also contain a brief mention of the post-release reviews as it only mentions some pre-release.
 * The second paragraph should also contain a brief mention of the post-release reviews as it only mentions some pre-release.
 * The second paragraph should also contain a brief mention of the post-release reviews as it only mentions some pre-release.
 * Some of the section is still written in future tense.
 * US price only is enough of a comparison as this is the price mentioned by sources, the UK price is unnecessary.
 * Price does not need to be mentioned in Launch as per WP:NOTCATALOG #5.
 * That it ships with an AC adapter is fairly trivial.
 * (I think)
 * "European/Australian/New Zealand" -> "European, Australian, and New Zealand" reads better.
 * The Nintendo Experience promotional tour paragraph could do with a secondary source or removal as it reads as slightly too promotional without evidence of notability of said tour.
 * That it ships with an AC adapter is fairly trivial.
 * (I think)
 * "European/Australian/New Zealand" -> "European, Australian, and New Zealand" reads better.
 * The Nintendo Experience promotional tour paragraph could do with a secondary source or removal as it reads as slightly too promotional without evidence of notability of said tour.
 * "European/Australian/New Zealand" -> "European, Australian, and New Zealand" reads better.
 * The Nintendo Experience promotional tour paragraph could do with a secondary source or removal as it reads as slightly too promotional without evidence of notability of said tour.
 * The Nintendo Experience promotional tour paragraph could do with a secondary source or removal as it reads as slightly too promotional without evidence of notability of said tour.
 * The Nintendo Experience promotional tour paragraph could do with a secondary source or removal as it reads as slightly too promotional without evidence of notability of said tour.
 * The Nintendo Experience promotional tour paragraph could do with a secondary source or removal as it reads as slightly too promotional without evidence of notability of said tour.
 * Opening sentence is a bit too technical.
 * This source might be worth adding for the single screen information.
 * This source might be worth adding for the single screen information.
 * This source might be worth adding for the single screen information.
 * I'm not sure how much this section adds to the readers understanding of the article. it could probably receive a one sentence mention in the Hardware section.
 * Would be better if there was at least one or two secondary reliable sources per paragraph.
 * "Mii Maker, which allows users create Mii characters" needs a copyedit.
 * The first paragraph of User Interface is almost a direct copy from Nintendo 3DS.
 * Trim the section down drastically.
 * The first paragraph of User Interface is almost a direct copy from Nintendo 3DS.
 * Trim the section down drastically.
 * The first paragraph of User Interface is almost a direct copy from Nintendo 3DS.
 * Trim the section down drastically.
 * Trim the section down drastically.
 * Trim the section down drastically.
 * The section over quotes; you should try to summarise what sources have said rather than writing "X said, Y said, Z said...".
 * The first two paragraphs sit awkwardly with the rest.
 * Make sure the right tense is being used - some of it still reads as though the 2DS hasn't been released yet.
 * The first two paragraphs sit awkwardly with the rest.
 * Make sure the right tense is being used - some of it still reads as though the 2DS hasn't been released yet.
 * Make sure the right tense is being used - some of it still reads as though the 2DS hasn't been released yet.
 * Make sure the right tense is being used - some of it still reads as though the 2DS hasn't been released yet.
 * This section suffers from some over-quotation, and reducing the amount of direct quotes used would be much better.
 * It's not clear whether retailers cut the price before or after the surge.
 * This (published today) is probably worth including in the section, if only as a single sentence.
 * Worth also mentioning that some retailers stopped selling the device after poor sales prior to the price cut:
 * }
 * Worth also mentioning that some retailers stopped selling the device after poor sales prior to the price cut:
 * }
 * Worth also mentioning that some retailers stopped selling the device after poor sales prior to the price cut:
 * }
 * }

Considering that I've mentioned two fairly large changes to the article (getting rid of most of one section and changing quite a lot of another), and my own limited time, I think I'll fail this GAN this time. I don't think there are many other major obstacles for the article and so hopefully you can take what I've written and use it to adapt the article in such a way that the next review is painless and goes through with little trouble; I think you'll do fine! Samwalton9 (talk) 17:56, 21 November 2013 (UTC)


 * Once again, thank you for your review. I have since trimmed down the Software and services section, and I'd like to know what you think about its current state (besides primary sources, which I've had no time to resolve yet). One more thing, regarding your last suggestion, when its mentioned that retailers stopped selling the device after poor sales, the article is referring to the Wii U. Nevertheless, I've added the reference to the article, since unlike the other that was in the article it emphasizes the price cut. Thank you.-- Arkhandar ( Talk • Contribs ) 13:18, 24 November 2013 (UTC)