Talk:Oil theft in Nigeria

Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment
This article was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment, between 22 January 2019 and 25 May 2019. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): Jandrie. Peer reviewers: Dalvarado98.

Above undated message substituted from Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment by PrimeBOT (talk) 01:50, 18 January 2022 (UTC)

Diana's Peer Review
I think your topic is very interesting and a very strong choice overall. I think you chose the structure of your sentences well; they are very clear, straightforward, and easy to understand. However I would comment on the tone and choice of diction. I know it's difficult to maintain that neutrality throughout because the topic is infuriating and it regards sensitive issues, but because it is a Wiki article, it is of utmost importance that we stick to that unbiased tone for credibility. With that said, I would rethink phrases used such as "ward off", "forced", or "for the sake of survival" because though they are accurate, they carry a negative connotation with them. I would also add some sources where you talk about percentages and other statistics just to ensure to the audience that you're providing accurate information. Lastly, I think it would be useful for you to hyperlink some words or concepts to other Wikipedia pages, such as "Niger Delta Avengers" so that if a reader isn't familiar with that concept, they can easily click the word and be redirected to a more specific and descriptive page. By doing this, you would also save yourself the time and energy of having to explain those concepts yourself. Other than that, it looks like your work is going in a great direction! It is difficult for me to give any addition suggestions because the article is in its very early stages and there's not much content yet, but seeing your subtitles, it seems as though you'll be providing much more great information! Best of luck and let me know if you have any questions on what I said above! — Preceding unsigned comment added by Rsfisher (talk) 21:22, 7 May 2019 (UTC) Edit summary: moved peer reviews from old sandbox talk to new one (lost with title change)

Sam's Peer Review
Interesting topic. Given that the title of your article is specifically about oil theft, one comment on the first two sub-sections: I would double check to make sure that the information you plan to provide is specifically related to oil theft, given that there may already be existing Wikipedia articles on the impact of oil in the Nigerian economy, or the involvement of multinational companies in this region. In your intro paragraph, you mention the relationship between illegal refineries, local pollution, and how pollution has “forced many members of the local population to participate in the illegal refinery of oil products for the sake of survival.” Perhaps you can elaborate on how pollution has accelerated the amount of people involved in illegal refining, as I did not completely follow the logic on this.

In terms of topics within your topic that would be interesting to learn more about: would be interested in reading more about other militant groups (if there are others) operating in the Delta and what their motivations are for oil theft, also how the Niger Delta Avengers has asserted itself politically, and how the Nigerian government plans on interacting with this group. Your sub-header about the existence of a black market for oil and the implications of this on global oil prices is particularly interesting. I also think it would be helpful to learn more about local communities and how the informal economy of oil theft is linked to a broader lack of economic opportunity in the region. Some statistics or a historical trajectory detailing whether oil theft is decreasing or increasing across time could also be useful towards the beginning of your article to establish some context for this issue. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Sammoore19 (talk • contribs) 05:01, 7 April 2019 (UTC)

Lead section has extra information
The lead section has extra information that is not in the body. See MOS:LEAD for purpose of the lead. It provides an accessible overview. Information in the lead should be in the body of the article too. See WP:LEADFOLLOWSBODY. Only one of the multinational oil companies listed in the lead is mentioned in the body of the article. For the other multinational oil companies, the article says "various". It is not clear to me why naming these other companies might be relevant to the issue of oil theft in Nigeria. Is this simply name dropping or should the article be saying something else about these companies? Otherwise why mention them? - Cameron Dewe (talk) 09:04, 27 May 2024 (UTC)