Talk:Out of This Club/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: K. Peake (talk · contribs) 09:38, 4 December 2022 (UTC)

I will conduct this review today! --K. Peake 09:38, 4 December 2022 (UTC)

Infobox and lead

 * Shouldn't the studio be identified as The Chocolate Factory?
 * ✅ Sorry, misread the booklet.


 * Pipe Chicago, Illinois to Chicago in the infobox


 * "It features its songwriters Polow da Don and its producer" → "The song features guest appearances from record producer Polow da Don and singer"


 * Add a sentence after the above one mentioning who wrote and produced it


 * "In the United States the song" → "In the United States, the song"


 * Pipe child pornography to R. Kelly
 * ❌ Piped it to Kelly#Exposure of child sexual abuse material and indictment (2002)


 * Simply change the "over" part of comp to mentioning piano melodies, minus any quotation marks


 * "It received mixed reviews from contemporary critics who either complimented or criticized" → "The song received mixed reviews from music critics, who were split towards"


 * "platforms following new allegations" → "platforms, following new allegations"

Production and release

 * "and Jamal "Polow Da Don" Jones," → "and Jamal "Polow da Don" Jones," with the pipe
 * ✅ Scrap my comment.
 * Hmm, sorry, don't follow. =]
 * "collaborated with the latter who, previously" → "collaborated with the record producer, who previously" to be specific


 * Pipe Abel Garibaldi to Die Warzau


 * "Jeff Meeks and Eric Schlotzer" → "Jeff Meeks, and Eric Schlotzer"


 * Remove overly obvious wikilink on Chicago, Illinois


 * Pipe mixed to Audio mixing (recorded music)


 * "and Jaycen Joshua with Kelly" → "and Jaycen Joshua, with Kelly"


 * Pipe programmed to Programming (music)


 * Remove the comma after second studio album


 * Pipe urban contemporary to Urban contemporary music


 * Remove the comma after second single


 * "follows Kelly's acquittal" → "came a couple of months after Kelly's acquittal" removing the part from the end of the sentence in this context

Composition and reception

 * Audio sample looks good!
 * ""Out of This Club" is" → "Musically, "Out of This Club" is"


 * ""midtempo jam",[3] production is" → ""mid-tempo jam",[3] the production is" per the source


 * ""plush beat" which results" → ""plush beat", which results"


 * "a cascading fashion" with the artists" → "a cascading fashion", with the artists"


 * "According Joey Guerra from the" → "According to Joey Guerra from the"


 * Pipe sugar daddy to Sugar dating


 * The party lifestyle part is not sourced
 * You mean to remove the pipe to Playboy lifestyle


 * "is a possbile" → "is a possible"


 * Pipe Usher to Usher (musician)


 * "Polow Da Don's rap line," → "Polow da Don's rap line,"


 * "which was produced by himself." → "which he had previously produced."


 * "and producer commenting he is" → "and producer, commenting he is"


 * "and noted down" → "and he noted down"


 * "didn't expect anything else from Kelly characterizing it" → "lacked expectations for Kelly, characterizing the song"


 * "criticized Kelly's songwriting describing it as" → "derided Kelly's songwriting as"


 * "as "phoned-in" adding he" → "as "phoned-in", adding he"


 * "lambasted "Out Of This Club" highlighting it" → "lambasted "Out Of This Club", pinpointing it"


 * Pipe Rohypnol to Flunitrazepam


 * Add the Bubbling Under position as the final para of this section, as that is commercial reception

Chart

 * "which represents the 25 songs which failed" → "which represented the 25 songs that failed" since the chart no longer exists


 * Make this the section after removal

Removal from album and sale

 * "their former label, Interscope Records to remove the song from all digital and streaming platforms," → "their former label Interscope Records to remove the song from all streaming platforms," per the source


 * "Beginning April of that year," → "Beginning April 2019,"


 * "with Heat magazine member Kimberly Wyatt" → "with Heat magazine, member Kimberly Wyatt"


 * "was out of the group's hands." → "was out of the group's hands:"

Final comments and verdict

 * until all of the issues are fixed! --K. Peake 21:21, 4 December 2022 (UTC)
 * Hey, thanks for doing this! I have done the edits! MrHyacinth (talk) 02:59, 9 December 2022 (UTC)
 * Pinging Onegreatjoke (talk) 23:39, 10 December 2022 (UTC)
 * Nice work, but you still need to either remove or source the party lifestyle part since none of the refs mention it. --K. Peake 11:20, 13 December 2022 (UTC)
 * Now? It was written in the Blender article. MrHyacinth (talk) 23:47, 15 December 2022 (UTC)
 * @Kyle Peake MrHyacinth (talk) 23:48, 15 December 2022 (UTC)
 * ✅ now, nice job on this! --K. Peake 08:56, 16 December 2022 (UTC)