Talk:Ozymandias (Breaking Bad)/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Some Dude From North Carolina (talk · contribs) 03:30, 7 March 2021 (UTC)

Hey, I'm going to be reviewing this article. Expect comments by the end of the week.  Some Dude From North Carolina  (talk) 03:30, 7 March 2021 (UTC)
 * Hi, I've addressed the below comments. DMT biscuit (talk) 18:40, 10 March 2021 (UTC)

General comments

 * Change all uses of Indiewire to IndieWire.
 * Change all uses of TIME to Time.
 * The dates in the references should be consistent with the prose so add the "Use mdy dates" template.

Infobox and lead

 * Infobox looks good.
 * I would remove the link to cliffhanger in the first paragraph per WP:OVERLINK.
 * That being said, I would also add a link to "To'hajiilee" in the last sentence of the first paragraph.
 * "freedoms then she" "freedom than she"
 * Remove the comma after "much analysis".
 * Add a comma after "depiction of redemption".
 * "televsion" "television"
 * "won the" "won the award for"

Plot

 * Plot is under 400 words, so that passes WP:FILMPLOT.
 * Remove the comma after "kill him anyway".
 * "leads to" doesn't sound right. Can I suggest changing it to "causes"?
 * The double use of "White home" sounds repetitive, so reword it.

Production

 * In the image's caption, change "Breaking Bad" to Breaking Bad.
 * Link Moira Walley-Beckett, Rian Johnson, "Fly", Betsy Brandt, and Anna Gunn.
 * "Giligan" "Series creator Vince Gilligan"
 * "Fly." "Fly".
 * "self described" "self-described"
 * "thoughout" "throughout"
 * "enamoured" "enamored"
 * "inconvient" "inconvenient"
 * "or Walt" "nor Walt"
 * "his short" "his hair short" (avoid confusion)
 * "by placed" "be placed"
 * Add a comma after "barrel".
 * "off screen" "off-screen"
 * "Coexecutive" "Co-executive"
 * A reference is needed for the first sentence of the last paragraph (recite it).

Analysis

 * "of audience" "of the audience"
 * The quote box for the phone call should be under the header.
 * "analysed" "analyzed"
 * "view it a ploy" "view it as a ploy"
 * "sympathise" "sympathize"

Reception

 * Are the mini-captions necessary?
 * Link Attack on Titan in the note.
 * "build up" "build-up"
 * Remove the comma after "IGN".
 * "arc of victim" "arc as a victim"
 * "on the each member of White family's arcs" "on each member of the White family's arcs"
 * "appalued" "applauded"
 * "as she begun" "as she began"
 * "The show's honesty" "the show's honesty"
 * "was described" "were described"
 * "enprisoniment" "imprisonment"
 * Specify the Primetime Emmy Awards ceremony where they won the three awards.