Talk:Patricia Arredondo

Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment
This article is or was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): Pim.v.

Above undated message substituted from Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment by PrimeBOT (talk) 02:09, 18 January 2022 (UTC)

Untitled
-Overall, a good start for an article. It had a lot of the typical elements most Wikipedia articles about an individual, up to Education.

-I found one of the papers she co-wrote on Google Scholar

-Mentioning specific studies would be beneficial I think, unless the awards section will have that included and states the work she did for those awards

-Could state what role she plays in the APA and the National Hispanic Psychological Association

-Current family is common on Wikipedia Articles

-The last sentence in the Education section was oddly phrased.

-What about her father's egalitarian views made her close to him

-What does she do now? Is she still alive? What kind of Legacy did she leave?

-Needs Sources ~Nathan Gerard

From: David Allen Peer Review

- on the line "she was quickly known for her interest in the studies of different cultures and traditions," how? or by whom? this sentence might be better after you get through talking about early childhood

- the sentence "Patricia shared a close relationship..." I think should move in front of "On the other hand her mother"

- the phrased "forced into" seems a little emotional/not neutral

- I think the background should be less emotional in its wording (for example "This early influence is no surprise" and "the helping profession of a psychologist") while the story is compelling, I think it would be better to try and stay neutral

- I think Journalism is capitalized if it's a degree name

Overall, I think there is a lot of good information here, it just needs to be phrased in a formal, strictly factual way. There are parts where I feel that you are persuading the reader to admire her, when it should just stay neutral. PeachOP (talk) 20:50, 30 March 2018 (UTC)