Talk:Paweł Jasienica/GA2

GA Review
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Reviewer: Ajh1492 (talk) 16:56, 2 June 2011 (UTC)

Review comments
It's a first reading, I haven't finished yet. Ajh1492 (talk) 16:56, 2 June 2011 (UTC)

Taking another cut at reading the article in detail, so there's more questions. Ajh1492 (talk) 03:07, 4 June 2011 (UTC)

Probably want to go through the entire article applying proper articles (a, an, the). I'll try to do some of it too :). Ajh1492 (talk) 14:56, 4 June 2011 (UTC)


 * Lede


 * Needs to be significantly longer, isn't compelling enough to want to read the rest of the article
 * Done. --Piotr Konieczny aka Prokonsul Piotrus&#124; talk 21:30, 3 June 2011 (UTC)


 * Life


 * Consider breaking up into subsections. It's a big mass of text that needs a little organization.
 * Done. --Piotr Konieczny aka Prokonsul Piotrus&#124; talk 21:30, 3 June 2011 (UTC)


 * What happened to his first wife? we hear that she is in Vilnius after WWII then no further word.
 * I cannot find anything on that in the sources accessible to me (online). If you find any source that has more to say on his wife, do let me know. I admit I have not read his diaries, nor the biographies from further reading (which I'd have done if this article was up for a FA). --Piotr Konieczny aka Prokonsul Piotrus&#124; talk 21:30, 3 June 2011 (UTC)


 * While in temporary prisoner of war camp in Opatów, he was able to escape from it with the help of some old school friends from the time his family lived there in early 1920s.[2] - the sentence structure is a little clunky.


 * In 1948 he was arrested by the Polish secret police (Polish: Urząd Bezpieczeństwa) but was released after the intervention of Bolesław Piasecki from the PAX Association. In gratitude to Piasecki, he worked with PAX in the future, leaving Tygodnik Powszechny for PAX in 1950. - I'm confused on when he was released since you cite being arrested in 1948, but then going to work for PAX in 1950. You might want to rework this passage for better structure.
 * Clarified, I hope. --Piotr Konieczny aka Prokonsul Piotrus&#124; talk 17:04, 6 June 2011 (UTC)


 * From at least till period till his death he would live in Warsaw.' - Huh? too many tills, you're making my head spin :)
 * Fixed :) --Piotr Konieczny aka Prokonsul Piotrus&#124; talk 17:04, 6 June 2011 (UTC)


 * Do you really want to leave that many red links in the entire article?
 * Per WP:RED, red is good. So yes. --Piotr Konieczny aka Prokonsul Piotrus&#124; talk 03:55, 4 June 2011 (UTC)


 * Did he take it as a pen name or legally change his name, it's not clear in the article.
 * I don't think the sources are very clear on that, unfortunately. --Piotr Konieczny aka Prokonsul Piotrus&#124; talk 03:55, 4 June 2011 (UTC)


 * Both Michnik and Samsonowicz note how Jasienica's works contain hidden messages in which Jasienica discusses more contemporary history.[8][17] - That's an interesting fact that you might want to cite an example of, assuming there is an easy one to cite ....
 * That was already discussed few paragraphs above, but I added a reminder about his most prominent "hidden message" book. --Piotr Konieczny aka Prokonsul Piotrus&#124; talk 17:04, 6 June 2011 (UTC)


 * Bibliography


 * what about calling the section Published works?
 * I have no feelings on that; if you think it would be better, please go ahead. --Piotr Konieczny aka Prokonsul Piotrus&#124; talk 21:30, 3 June 2011 (UTC)


 * Awards


 * Order of Polonia Restituta, Grand Cross, awarded twice (3 May 2007 and 1 March 2011), posthumously - why was it awarded twice?
 * Fixed, per pl wiki, it was awarded only once. --Piotr Konieczny aka Prokonsul Piotrus&#124; talk 21:30, 3 June 2011 (UTC)


 * References


 * why not rename to References
 * You meant Notes. Renamed :) --Piotr Konieczny aka Prokonsul Piotrus&#124; talk 21:30, 3 June 2011 (UTC)


 * reference 6 link is broken
 * works for me, but takes a moment to load through some new script at the archive.org. --Piotr Konieczny aka Prokonsul Piotrus&#124; talk 21:30, 3 June 2011 (UTC)


 * check to make sure you have a language tag on all the references (#9 is missing one)
 * Added. --Piotr Konieczny aka Prokonsul Piotrus&#124; talk 21:30, 3 June 2011 (UTC)


 * reference 10 link is broken
 * Also works, same archive.org issue. --Piotr Konieczny aka Prokonsul Piotrus&#124; talk 21:30, 3 June 2011 (UTC)