Talk:Philadelphia Flyers–Ottawa Senators brawl/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 07:32, 1 July 2015 (UTC)

Comments (note, outside my comfort zone, knowing zero about NHL but article looked interesting!) Very interesting read. A whole different world... I'll put it on hold to look at these quibbles, nothing major though. The Rambling Man (talk) 08:08, 1 July 2015 (UTC)
 * "in a league-record for" don't think this needs to be hyphenated, if it said "in a league-record number of minutes" it would be...
 * Changed as suggested.
 * "The 213 minutes assessed against Philadelphia were also a record" was also a record?
 * Changed as suggested.
 * "as were the " was? the record is singular.
 * Changed as suggested.
 * " incidents were precipitated by an incident" repetitive.
 * Changed to "events were precipitated by an incident".
 * "of the hockey game" is hockey needed here?
 * Removed.
 * "got involved" strong dislike for "got", perhaps "became"?
 * Changed as suggested.
 * "The first instance angered..." sorry, which first instance?
 * Changed to "The first of these angered.." Does that make any more sense? (It might not.)
 * "late February" now I think that should be hyphenated.
 * Changed as suggested.
 * Is there a link for "high-sticking"?
 * Yup, added.
 * "leaving their crease as well as fighting majors" bit jargon loaded here, not helpful for non-experts.
 * I added a link for "leaving their crease" and "fighting". Major penalty was already linked to in the background section.
 * "face-off" is linked somewhat late in the article...
 * It is linked in the lead, and then the first usage in the body.
 * "Within 24 second of" missing s.
 * Oops. Added.
 * "a misconduct and double game misconduct" again, jargon heavy, no links, help!!
 * Added a link for "misconduct". "Game misconduct" is already linked. Should I put a note to explain the "double"?
 * " that the Senators "knew we had to fight back.... " now, in this quote I would think that you should replace "we" with "[they]" so the sentence (including the part before the quote) makes grammatical sense.
 * Changed as suggested.
 * "with lots of" with many, with numerous, just something a little more toned than "lots of".
 * Changed as suggested.
 * "head coach, Jacques Martin. However, he was restrained by Flyers Public Relations Director Zack Hill.." merge, to "... Martin, but was restrained..."
 * Reworked this a bit, how is it now?
 * "despite some bluster" is this encyclopedic?
 * Nope, changes to "despite some claims"
 * Any reason why the score in the Box score table is in bold?
 * It's the way it's done in all the hockey article with that table. I made it plain text though.
 * "Number in parenthesis " -> parentheses.
 * Oops. Fixed.
 * Be consistent with linking player's names in the penalty table, e.g. you relink Fisher, but not Somik for some reason.
 * Oops. Fixed.
 * "John LeClair" not "John Leclair"
 * Oops. Fixed.
 * Thanks for the review. It's something different to cricket, that's for sure! I've addressed each of your points. Harrias talk 08:50, 3 July 2015 (UTC)
 * Good stuff, I have no problems with your fixes, so I'm happy to promote to GA. Nice work.  The Rambling Man (talk) 12:59, 3 July 2015 (UTC)