Talk:Polio in Pakistan/Archive 1

Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment
This article is or was the subject of a Wiki Education Foundation-supported course assignment. Further details are available on the course page. Student editor(s): Khanzar. Peer reviewers: Emily.johnson135, MYao.

Above undated message substituted from Template:Dashboard.wikiedu.org assignment by PrimeBOT (talk) 02:29, 18 January 2022 (UTC)

Problems with the article
The second paragraph of the lead claims that the CIA was to blame for hampering eradication efforts. This claim comes from an editorial in The Guardian by Heidi Larson. I thought we were not to rely on editorials for facts.

In general, the article appears to focus too much on the supposed (and apparently temporary) effects of Dr. Afridi's hepatitis-B-vaccination-and-DNA-gathering operation and by doing so it misses the bigger picture. For example, the lead says polio cases increased by 37% in Pakistan in 2011, but doesn't mention, from the same source, that in Nigeria cases increased by 185% and in Afghanistan by 220% in 2011. Is the CIA to blame for those increases as well?

In the "Factors affecting eradication" section, the only factor mentioned is the CIA.

The article needs some serious work to remove it from the "hit piece" category. --  Kenatipo   speak! 23:06, 3 June 2012 (UTC)
 * I agree with some of the issues you raised and it is on my to do list will start working on it probably in a month time. -- S M S  Talk 21:08, 14 June 2012 (UTC)

I intend to expand the "Factors affecting eradication" section with scholarly sources rather than editorial and news sources. "Political unrest, poor health infrastructure, and government negligence” are mentioned but need to be expounded. I would welcome feedback as I do so. Khanzar (talk) 16:57, 10 September 2015 (UTC) Khanzar

Orphaned references in Poliomyelitis in Pakistan
I check pages listed in Category:Pages with incorrect ref formatting to try to fix reference errors. One of the things I do is look for content for orphaned references in wikilinked articles. I have found content for some of Poliomyelitis in Pakistan's orphans, the problem is that I found more than one version. I can't determine which (if any) is correct for this article, so I am asking for a sentient editor to look it over and copy the correct ref content into this article.

Reference named "reuters.com": From The Guardian: Mark Hosenball and John Whitesides (Washington), "Obama administration defends massive phone record collection", Reuters, 6 June 2013. From Poliomyelitis: http://www.reuters.com/article/2015/07/23/us-health-polio-nigeria-idUSKCN0PX2RF20150723 

I apologize if any of the above are effectively identical; I am just a simple computer program, so I can't determine whether minor differences are significant or not. AnomieBOT ⚡ 14:55, 5 August 2015 (UTC)

Peer Review
The initial contribution was very comprehensive, well-structured, and read just like any other article. I liked that there were a lot of citations. In terms of future contributions, I would definitely recommend adding graphics or images to display the statistics and research that you mention throughout the article.

MYao (talk) 01:07, 22 October 2015 (UTC)MYao

Peer Review
Your page would benefit from more illustrations, especially maps! More information could also be provided but I’m sure you will do this later on as you add more to your article. Besides that great work! Gilperkins (talk) 02:13, 22 October 2015 (UTC)Gilperkins

I really like the way you have broken up the timeline and the difference between two different time periods. Maybe you could give a more historical perspective on the Bin Laden case and how that panned out. Or maybe just link back to it.

You have done an excellent job with this article in just a few weeks! It is so comprehensive and includes enough information for someone to get a thorough understanding. The public health perspective of disease is very important and I really like how you speak from that position. I believe that there are many important bits of information included in this article and it is evident that if anyone is looking for information on this article, they will find it with ease. I think the other factors section could be perhaps expanded to include a cultural taboos section which addresses much of the information that is already presented to us in the article. The one thing I would think would be perhaps interesting to know is why the rate of polio goes up when there are large floods. Causality might be important so that people who may read the article know maybe how it can be prevented. Another thing is that maybe including subheadings in the other factors section could be nice. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Romildcp (talk • contribs) 12:09, 5 November 2015 (UTC)

Romildcp (talk) —Preceding undated comment added 14:54, 22 October 2015 (UTC)

Peer Review
This is a really interesting article! The political, social and cultural context of polio vaccination are presented well, and the article gives good information about the current condition of polio vaccination. I think it would be interesting to expand this article to polio care, cultural stigmas or beliefs about the disease (as well as the vaccination), and maybe even the public health system in Pakistan. Besides these expansions, and maybe a double check on some of the grammar or wording, I think this article looks really good! Emily.johnson135 (talk) 01:27, 5 November 2015 (UTC)