Talk:Red-backed fairywren/GA1

GA Review
This review is transcluded from Talk:Red-backed Fairy-wren/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

I'll review this asap, but may not be able to start for a few days. jimfbleak (talk) 09:58, 11 June 2008 (UTC)


 * That's fine. Be as thorough as possible for transparency reasons :) Cheers, Casliber (talk · contribs) 10:11, 11 June 2008 (UTC)

I'll read through again tomorrow, but that's enough for now jimfbleak (talk) 18:31, 11 June 2008 (UTC)
 * 1) in lead Kimberleys in the northwest to the Hunter River region in New South Wales, no articles to link to these? First two sentences have "area" 4x (linked and removed redundant)
 * 2) The preferred habitat is heathland and savannah, particularly where low shrubs and tall grasses provide cover. It can be nomadic The countryside wanders? Also first sentence says moist grassy areas - I don't associate savannah with moist? (tall grassland but near water. Removed odd bit)
 * 3) The Red-backed Fairy-wren may be sexually promiscuous, meaning that although they form (actually bit is redundant and removed)
 * 4) At least arguable that second para of lead could be split.
 * 5) taxonomy phylogenetic needs link or gloss (linked like WWFW), one-coloured seems a bit clunky, is there a better phrasing? (uniform?) (or wholly- ?)
 * ssp, nominate ssp needs link or gloss --> do you think Subspecies is a clear enough link for nominate? It is used in Puerto Rican Amazon.
 * 1) Evolutionary history - single para section is a bit stubby. (added a bit)
 * 2) description - number wanders a bit, the male but The females. look remarkably similar to non-breeding males presumably?
 * 3) Vocalizations - single para section Their typical song for advertising their territory tidier to make clear it's the male from the start, esp as next bit refers to the male's call, not song. starting weak and soft shouldn't these be adverbs?
 * 4) D&H Birds will retreat to fire-resistant cover at times of fire.[25] Research has shown that they do not fare well in arid places or areas prone to fire, lots of fire, what research?
 * 5) Behaviour - However, birds may run when performing the rodent-run display. Its balance is assisted by a proportionally large tail, also relatively probably better (converted to singular, and relatively)
 * 6) Feeding - it consumes a wide variety of insects, including beetles such as weevils, leaf-, jewel-, flea- and ground-beetles, bugs, grasshoppers, moths, wasps and cicadas. Insect larvae and eggs are eaten as well as spiders. Seeds and other plant material make up only a very small proportion of their diet.[32] (got it)
 * 7) Courtship and breeding - Here it will fly Here? (was linking word but is redundant so removed) It also picks red petals off flowers and sometimes red seeds up yuk. Query populaces and reddy- reddish-? (changed x 2, I didn't add that bit)
 * 8) molt, defense and molting yuk! (got 'em)
 * 9) lots of one-phrase sentences
 * 10) nest - some more sing/plural vacillation, (got 'em)
 * 11) refs 10, 19, 21, 22, 35, 36, 37, 40 at least incorrectly formatted, 36 also has very odd capitalisation in the title, and 38 and 39 appear identical as do 21 and 26
 * 12) ref one needs italics, you need to decide in book refs whether initials go before or after surname, and whether they have full stops or not. Some books lack isbns or page numbers
 * "Tomorrow now." I've tweaked the items above, mainly more ref formatting issues. The prose other than the points above isn't bad, but a bit choppy due to short sentences and some unnecessary repetition of words. Will need polish before FAC jimfbleak (talk) 05:56, 12 June 2008 (UTC)
 * Let me know when you're ready for the formal review. I note that ref 22 needs reformatting and an isbn, and ref 37 needs a title! (done both now)
 * Gimme 48 hours. I should have dealt with all material raised thus far and then some. Cheers, Casliber (talk · contribs) 15:57, 13 June 2008 (UTC)


 * Looking forward to FA, why not add a habitat image? Also I seem to remember discussion about whether journal names should always be full rather than abbreviated, can't recall outcome. If available, something on lifespan, predators (added a bit) would be helpful jimfbleak (talk) 05:25, 13 June 2008 (UTC)
 * There's no rush at all jimfbleak (talk) 19:00, 13 June 2008 (UTC)

Update
Still waiting on a map, delved a bit more and fleshed out a little on nesting. There is nothing on lifespan that I can find, so I think this is just about as comprehensive as can be. So now or never I guess....Cheers, Casliber (talk · contribs) 12:24, 15 June 2008 (UTC)

PS:I think I got everything above apart from lengthening a few sentences, so lemme know. Cheers, Casliber (talk · contribs) 12:25, 15 June 2008 (UTC)
 * What's wrong with Sabine's map on the talk page? I'll have a final read through, but not now, I've got to mow the lawn when I've finished my cup of tea ):


 * GA review (see here for criteria)


 * 1) It is reasonably well written. #:a (prose):  b (MoS):
 * 2) It is factually accurate and verifiable.
 * a (references): b (citations to reliable sources):  c (OR):
 * 1) It is broad in its coverage.
 * a (major aspects): b (focused):
 * 1) It follows the neutral point of view policy.
 * Fair representation without bias:
 * 1) It is stable.
 * No edit wars etc.:
 * 1) It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
 * a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
 * 1) Overall:aye

Pass/Fail: