Talk:Reggie Barnes (skateboarder)/GA1

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.''

Nominator: 16:08, 8 September 2023 (UTC)

Nominator: 16:08, 8 September 2023 (UTC)

Reviewer: Arconning (talk · contribs) 13:28, 6 June 2024 (UTC)


 * I will be reviewing this article. Arconning (talk · contribs)

Overall

 * Many issues, I would consider this as C class as it's a bit hard to navigate possibly to a casual reader. Though I'm willing to wait.
 * Unsure whether to replace pro with professional as my knowledge of skateboarding is limited. Mentions of pro in this review will be stated as is. Comment: I have changed all casual usage of "pro" to "professional." Several of the mentioned competitions use the phrase "Pro" in their name and, therefore, have been left as is. The term "Pro" is also used as a standard field in the Infobox, indicating that "pro" is a term typically used in biographies of professional athletes.
 * I'll give you around ten days by the way^^

Infobox and lead

 * ✅ c. 1961, use c. templates for the circa symbol in the infobox and lead.
 * ✅ Bold his birth name.
 * ✅ Reginald Barnes Jr., aka Reggie Barnes (born c. 1961), spell out as also known as, and put it after the birthdate. Comment: I combined the two names as this is a better solution
 * ✅ Put his education as Cape Fear Technical Institute yet wikilink using original text. Comment: I created a redirect for Cape Fear Technical Institute as this was lacking
 * ✅ Source his height. Comment: This in now included at the end of the Personal life section, with sources.
 * ✅ the founder/CEO of Eastern Skateboard Supply, the largest skateboard wholesale company in North America., you should probably put this info in the body as well and source it there instead. Comment: Good catch. Thanks!
 * world's fair, capitalize. Comment: The term "worlds fair" is not capitalized in the first sentence of the linked article. My usage of the phrase matches that of the linked article and is not part of the event's name. Therefore, the phrase is not capitalized per MOS.
 * ✅ Endless Grind Raleigh, North Carolina, change to Endless Grind in Raileigh, North Carolina, unless that's the actual name of the business.
 * ✅ the next generation of professional skaters., next generation might be too informal.
 * ✅ is a wholesale company, in Wilmington, North Carolina, add comma on the end.
 * ✅East Coast., wikilink. Comment: The first use of East Coast in the lede and article body are already linked.

Early life

 * ✅ Barnes is from Cary, North Carolina, add comma on the end.
 * ✅ In 1976 when he was fourteen years old,, add comma after 1976.
 * ✅ flips suited Barnes who, add comma after Barnes.
 * ✅ open air basketball courts, add hyphen to form open-air.

Amateur skateboarding

 * ✅ Change title to Amateur career to emulate other sport biography articles.
 * {{done} Jacksonville, Florida in March 1978., add comma after Florida.
 * ✅ as par tof Tem Powerflex., as part of Tem Powerflex unless it's supposed to be Team Powerflex. Change accordingly.
 * ✅ "a dynamic freestyle routine", add comma after routine.
 * ✅ 16–19 Freestyle contest, from my knowledge of skateboarding, freestyle should be uncapitalized.
 * cola wars, capitalize Cola per original article wikilinked. Comment: Cola wars is not capitalized in its article; only the article title has capitalization. Therefore, according to MOS, this phrase should not be capitalized.

Professional skateboarding

 * ✅ Change title to Professional career to emulate other sport biography articles.
 * ✅ a pro, add comma after pro. Comment: I changed "pro" to "professional"
 * ✅ Huntington Beach California, Huntington Beach, California,.
 * ✅ "real' pros", remove apostrophe.
 * ✅ Di Dootson, add comma on end.
 * ✅ Barnes sponsor Powerflext, add comma on end.
 * ✅ $50/, replace slash with a period/full stop.
 * ✅ world champion Chris Chadwick, Rodney Mullen, add comma on end.
 * ✅ Wilmington North Carolina, Wilmington, North Carolina,.
 * ✅ at Magic Mountain, add comma on end.
 * ✅ "Good energy and crowds, back east they don't have much going on like this, so it's good fun for a change of sceneries. Lots of fun.", add [sic] template.
 * the world's fair, capitalize World's Fair. Comment: The term "worlds fair" is not capitalized in the first sentence of the linked article. My usage of the phrase matches that of the linked article and is not part of the event's name. Therefore, the phrase is not capitalized per MOS.
 * ✅ in Germany in 1987, add comma after.
 * ✅ Stoked!.", remove period.
 * ✅ November 1, 2000,, add On at the start.
 * ✅ neon–yellow, replace with hyphen.

Competitions

 * ✅ Spell out months.
 * Considering it's an incomplete list, I guess it's alright.

Filmography

 * ✅ In the 1980s, Unreel Productions produced a series of videos documenting the National Skateboard Association's championship competitions.[47] Released in 1986, Skateboard: NSA '86 Summer Series Volume 4: Oceanside Street Attack showed highlights of the Oceanside, California Freestyle Contest, including Barnes' entire fifth place routine.[47], this statement just uses the same source another time. I suggest just putting the reference on the end.
 * ✅ Oceanside, California, add comma on end. Comment: That would be putting a comma in the middle of the event's name.
 * ✅ Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles (1990), add comma on end.
 * ✅ in the East Coast Motions volume 1,, remove the and capitalize Volume.

Other ventures

 * ✅ Barnes had the industry contacts, while Flythe had the line of credit., a bit informal.
 * ✅ Barnes contacted his mentor Bruce Walker,, add comma after mentor.
 * ✅ the company grossed, the company had grossed.
 * ✅ sales are $24.64 million, change are to were.
 * ✅ Pro-skater Pat Duffy, pro-skater, pro-skaters, remove hyphens. Comment: I changed all uses of "pro-skater" to "professional skater" unless it was used as part of a team or competition name.
 * ✅ 20,000 square feet, 20,000-square-foot. Comment: This is automatically generated by the convert template and is, therefore, not editable.
 * ✅ Barnes frequently brings famous names, a bit informal but wouldn't mind it. Optional.

Personal

 * ✅ Rename the section to Personal life.
 * ✅ Cape Fear Community College), son Mason,, put comma at end.
 * ✅ Wilmington after graduating,, remove comma.
 * ✅ both which continue as successful businesses., to both of which continue to be successful businesses..

Image and legacy

 * ✅ Although not known as an innovator, either change wording for a more formal approach or add quotes to "innovator".
 * ✅ Rewrite, this would be better if it's written as paragraphs rather than bullet points. But if the bullet points were to be kept, please rewrite to a more formal tone. Comment: This was already written as paragraphs but formatted as a bulleted list to break up the text visually. I am fine removing the bulleted list if that is your recommendation. Please note that the informal tone is in the quotes.

Images

 * ✅ There aren't any images but even locations where he skated would be useful. Images would heavily improve the article due to the length of it, might need some visual aids for the reader. Comment: I totally agree with this suggestion but am limited by copyright. This was the era of niche print magazines and video recorders, not online publications and Flickr. Most of the locations were closed years ago; even articles on the locations and skaters lack photos. I found and added one location photo (to both this and its article), an event logo, and a couple of photos for the mentioned skaters. (I looked for all locations and named skaters). Not perfect but better. I also linked numerous videos to External links. This will not help the visual nature of the text but will provide images to go with the text.

Refs

 * Reference 3 has to be heavily changed, Spotify is most likely not a reliable source, and it references up to like almost 40 statements. Comment: Spotify is not the source but the hosting website for a Reggie Barnes interview from All I Need Skate by Anthony Shelter. Because this source is an interview, you are correct that I need to use care when including its contents. As a result, I have reduced the number of citations. Note that WP:INTERVIEWS indicates that interviews are allowed as sources "for supporting uncontroversial claims by interviewees about themselves". I believe that applies here.
 * ✅ Reference 34 is a site for online selling, change. Comment: Moved to external links as its role was to show the skateboard and logo.
 * ✅ Reference 44 cites an image, though seems to be from a reliable source but would rather link the actual website instead. Comment: I can only link to the magazine issue in the Thrasher archive, not the specific page cited (which was the previously linked PDF). I made this adjustment for all items from the Thrasher archive.
 * Formatted properly.

Spotchecks

 * At most, a 51.3% plagiarism violation possible per copyvio tool. Comment: The tool does not identify quotations and counts them as possible violations. Because this article has a fair number of quotations, it ends up with a high percentage. This is normal for an article with many quotations.
 * ✅ Manual check, some wording is a bit too close with sources such as ref 28 and 31. Comment: I went back to ensure I was checking the right citations but didn't see your concerns. 31's overlap was a long quote, in quotation marks. I removed the quote. 28 has an ad with no sentences as a source; the overlap appears to be the name of the skateboard and the use of one other word. Nevertheless, I reworded the sentence.

Misc.

 * No ongoing edit war, pretty broad and focused on the topic.
 * Will have to get a second opinion for overall prose, though everything looks good.
 * How is this review going? I noticed there hasn't been any activity for a month. Is there anything in particular that requires a second opinion? Adabow (talk) 05:09, 11 July 2024 (UTC)
 * @Adabow Honestly, everything looks great to my standard but I just need a second opinion, just to be fully sure, on the overall prose of the lead. Arconning (talk) 06:54, 11 July 2024 (UTC)
 * In my opinion, the article clearly meets criterion 1a (the prose is clear, concise, and understandable to an appropriately broad audience; spelling and grammar are correct). Note the difference between this criterion and that of featured articles that "prose is engaging and of a professional standard". However, I think it might be worthwhile making sure to check closely that each time a primary source such as an interview is used, that it is for simple biographical information or that the claims it supports are directly attributed to Barnes. For example, most of the sentences that ref 4 supports, but I recommend taking another read to double-check. WP:INTERVIEWS (as Rublamb mentions above) and WP:PRIMARY are useful reads for context. Adabow (talk) 07:15, 11 July 2024 (UTC)