Talk:Rhys Williams (Torchwood)/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Glimmer721 (talk · contribs) 21:06, 9 May 2012 (UTC)

Will review soon. Glimmer721 talk  21:06, 9 May 2012 (UTC)

Comments:
 * "Rhys' role is increased after the second series; actor Kai Owen is given star billing from Children of Earth onwards" - unlink Kai Owen as he was just linked above; maybe explain that Children of Earth was a serial that made up the third sereis
 * Done, put in parenthesis.
 * "The character has went on" → "The character has gone on"
 * Fixed
 * "a 2011 BBC/Starz co-production" - BBC doesn't need to be linked again
 * unlinked
 * Anwen is linked in the plot summary section, but not the intro
 * linked in intro too. Also linked Gwen in first section of summary for consistency.
 * "a contrast to Torchwood's activities and it's charismatic leader Jack Harkness" - "it's" should be "its", and link Jack
 * done.
 * Plot summary for "End of Days": briefly explain what the rift is, as it is the first time it has been mentioned. Unless it wasn't the rift after all that erased it from history...
 * mentioned time reset and it being a space-time rift. Think that's all that's needed given that it doesn't relate to much else in the article.
 * "Rhys becomes a main character in the third series of Torchwood, a five-part miniseries called Children of Earth airing in 2009." Add bolded word
 * done
 * "Series four, Miracle Day (2011) begins..." Comma after "(2011)"
 * done
 * "and also has a significant role in The Twilight Streets, (Released March 2008)..." The R in "released" should be lowercase
 * done
 * "...after the Torchwood Team fall are destroyed fighting..." Not sure what the word "fall" is doing there
 * removed
 * "Rhys makes an appearance in the Torchwood Radio Play..." Don't think "radio play" needs to be capitalized
 * removed capitals and linked
 * "With Gwen dead, and Jack missing Rhys is..." No comma after "dead"
 * removed.
 * "Rhys also appears in "The Devil and Miss Carew", (2011) an additional radio play, set between" comma after "(2011)" instead of the title; no comma after "play"
 * fixed
 * "and that his girlfriends job is nothing more unusual" - "girlfriends" should be "girlfriend's"
 * heh, fixed
 * The original intention of the writers had been for Rhys to die at the end of season one but Richard Stokes explains that it was overruled by show creator Russell T Davies" Comma after "season one", link RTD
 * done
 * "Actor Kai Owen attributes part of his character's success to his on screen rapport with actress Eve Myles." Hyphen in "on-screen"
 * done
 * "After reprisal from death Russell T Davies felt" - comma after "death"
 * done
 * Shorten "Russell T Davies" to "Davies" in the second paragraph of "Characterisation"
 * done
 * Stephen James Walker is linked twice in "Characterisation"
 * delinked second occurance
 * "opining that he, along with Barrowman, Myles and David Lloyd managed..." Isn't there a hyphen in "David-Lloyd"?
 * yep
 * "Speaking of the shows fourth series premiere" - "shows" should be "show's"
 * fixed
 * References: episode citation should have the "seriesno" and "number" parameters filled out. Also, clarify the titles of the credited people (writer, director, etc)
 * added series/episode numbers and titles in brackets.
 * Could the Torchwood Magazine refs be expanded with more parameters filled out?
 * Google is a wonderful thing.
 * Ref #49 and #71 need accessdates
 * Put todays. (#48 and #70 since I took a redundant news article out of the series four plot section)
 * Ref #72 needs a publisher
 * Added. (#71)
 * Disambiguation links
 * Fixed.
 * This warns that ref #74 will expire; might want to grab an archive.
 * Included archived version

Putting on hold for 7 days. Pretty minor fixes though; you should be good to go soon! Glimmer721 talk  21:57, 9 May 2012 (UTC)


 * Think I've taken care of everything bar the references, will double check and comment against each point after I get round to filling those out. Thank you for a very comprehensive review! Eshlare (talk) 22:49, 9 May 2012 (UTC)
 * Update: Just fleshed out all the references where needed. Think everything else has been tackled. Let me know if there's anything I've missed. Thanks again for your time. Eshlare (talk) 00:37, 10 May 2012 (UTC)
 * Looks like everything has been addressed. Passing! Glimmer721  talk  22:00, 10 May 2012 (UTC)