Talk:Rio (Duran Duran album)/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: Ippantekina (talk · contribs) 11:42, 23 September 2022 (UTC)

Review to come soon- Ippantekina (talk) 11:42, 23 September 2022 (UTC)

Lead

 * "pursuing a crush" I am unsure if "crush" is encyclopedic tone
 * love interest?


 * "The iconic cover artwork" a little puffery
 * Adjusted


 * "Initially unsuccessful in the United States, Capitol Records commissioned a remix to better match American radio at the time, which went on to spend" grammar
 * Spent?

Background and development

 * "demos of several songs at the basement studio of EMI's Manchester Square building that would appear on their next album" grammar
 * Fixed


 * What do we mean by "sessions proper"?
 * Official. Changed to that.


 * I am pretty sure it's "cherished" instead of "charished"
 * Fixed


 * "the sequenced-based tracks" I don't get what this means
 * Built using sequences via synthesizers


 * I'd link synthesiser
 * Done

Recording

 * I'd link overdubs, mix, kibbutz
 * Done


 * "Hamilton had previously contributed to the "night version" of "Planet Earth" " Is "Planet Earth" a song by the band?
 * Yessir. Clarified

Promotion

 * "With "Planet Earth" director Russell Mulcahy, the band produced videos" I'd write "Russel Mulcahy, who had directed "Planet Earth", worked with the band on..."
 * Fixed


 * "All the videos were storyboarded and art directed by former film student Marcello Anciano" I'd switch to the active voice
 * Done


 * De-italicize Associated Press
 * Done


 * "Entering the UK Singles Chart at number 35, Duran Duran mimed to the song" grammar
 * Fixed

Critical reception

 * I don't see how the quotebox is helpful; usage of quotebox is discouraged per WP:LONGQUOTE. I'd also revise the quoteboxes in the prior sections.

American remix

 * "issued Rio through its Harvest subsidiary, which debuted at number 164 on Billboard's Top LPs & Tape" grammar
 * Done

Overall

 * Too many quoteboxes! See WP:LONGQUOTE (which I raised above) and revise them.
 * How's that look?


 * Except for the issues I raised above, the article is overall well-written. Putting this . Ippantekina (talk) 04:23, 26 September 2022 (UTC)
 * Replies above. Thanks for reviewing! – zmbro (talk) (cont) 00:04, 29 September 2022 (UTC)
 * Thanks for addressing my comments. I went on to rewrite a sentence in the lead. The article looks fine now, great job! Ippantekina (talk) 02:26, 29 September 2022 (UTC)