Talk:Robert Grace (manufacturer)/GA1

GA Review
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Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 19:42, 10 March 2021 (UTC)

Comments
 * " iron items like " -> " iron items including"
 * ✅ --Doug Coldwell (talk) 20:33, 11 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "Benjamin Franklin" link.
 * ✅ --Doug Coldwell (talk) 20:33, 11 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "Benjamin Franklin. He once loaned Franklin some money"... "Benjamin Franklin to whom he once made a monetary loan."
 * ✅ --Doug Coldwell (talk) 20:41, 11 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "Franklin repaid him with the design of the Franklin" -> "The debt was repaid by Franklin with the design of his eponymous stove"... just trying to avoid Franklin so many times in one sentence.
 * ✅ --Doug Coldwell (talk) 20:41, 11 March 2021 (UTC)


 * " One thing led to another" not encyclopedic in tone at all.
 * ✅ --Doug Coldwell (talk) 20:41, 11 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Where is DoB referenced.
 * ✅ - At the bottom of page 376 of James (1874) reference. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 22:02, 11 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "descendant of the seventeenth-century" well given he was born in the early 18th century, is it possible to say how "descended"? Richard Grace died only 18 years before Robert Grace was born...
 * ✅ --Doug Coldwell (talk) 22:02, 11 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "Baron of Courtstown" what/where is this?
 * ✅ - At the top of page 376 of James (1874) reference.--Doug Coldwell (talk) 22:02, 11 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Might be worth linking "invasion of Ireland".
 * ✅ --Doug Coldwell (talk) 22:02, 11 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "repaid in more ways than one" not encyclopedic in tone.
 * ✅ --Doug Coldwell (talk) 22:02, 11 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "Junto Club" is this notable?
 * ✅ Linked to our article. It is the base reason for the existence of the Philadelphia Public Library.--Doug Coldwell (talk) 22:10, 11 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "It was proposed" by whom?
 * ✅ - By members of the Junto Club --Doug Coldwell (talk) 22:20, 11 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "by Benjamin Franklin for" no need for first name.
 * ✅ --Doug Coldwell (talk) 22:22, 11 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "married Mrs. Rebecca Nutt" where I'm from, we don't put a period at the end of Mrs
 * ✅ --Doug Coldwell (talk) 22:24, 11 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "and Franklin. Franklin invented" repetitive.
 * ✅ --Doug Coldwell (talk) 22:42, 11 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Link "casting" appropriately.
 * ✅ --Doug Coldwell (talk) 22:42, 11 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "revolutionary" in what sense?!
 * ✅ -wl American Revolutionary War --Doug Coldwell (talk) 22:42, 11 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "Grace was selling.." Grace sold...
 * ✅ --Doug Coldwell (talk) 22:42, 11 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "Franklin was advertising... " Franklin advertised...
 * ✅ --Doug Coldwell (talk) 22:42, 11 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "sold thru merchants" through.
 * ✅ --Doug Coldwell (talk) 22:42, 11 March 2021 (UTC)


 * Is there a "manufacturer" category appropriate here?
 * ✅ --Doug Coldwell (talk) 22:55, 11 March 2021 (UTC)

That's it, on hold. The Rambling Man (Stay alert! Control the virus! Save lives!&#33;!&#33;) 19:46, 11 March 2021 (UTC)
 * Thanks for review. I'll start working on the issues.--Doug Coldwell (talk) 20:28, 11 March 2021 (UTC)
 * All issues have been addressed. Can you take another look. Thanks.--Doug Coldwell (talk) 22:55, 11 March 2021 (UTC)


 * "when he was a teenager " who, Franklin or Grace?
 * ✅ - when Grace was a teenager --Doug Coldwell (talk) 11:34, 12 March 2021 (UTC)

The Rambling Man (Stay alert! Control the virus! Save lives!&#33;!&#33;) 08:28, 12 March 2021 (UTC)
 * "iron bells were also made at this forge factory. An iron bell" bit clunky repetitive, can we rephrase to smooth it out with the repeat?
 * ✅ --Doug Coldwell (talk) 11:42, 12 March 2021 (UTC)
 * Additional issues addressed. Can you tke another look. Thanks.--Doug Coldwell (talk) 11:42, 12 March 2021 (UTC)
 * Ok cool, seems fine to me, so promoting. Good work. The Rambling Man (Stay alert! Control the virus! Save lives!&#33;!&#33;) 13:05, 12 March 2021 (UTC)