Talk:Rose C. Davison/GA1

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.''

Reviewer: Iazyges (talk · contribs) 02:53, 24 August 2018 (UTC)

Will start soon. Iazyges  Consermonor   Opus meum  02:53, 24 August 2018 (UTC)

Criteria
GA Criteria:
 * 1
 * 1.a
 * 1.b
 * 2
 * 2.a
 * 2.b
 * 2.c
 * 2.d
 * 3
 * 3.a
 * 3.b
 * 4
 * 4.a
 * 5
 * 5.a
 * 6
 * 6.a
 * 6.b
 * No DAB links
 * No dead links
 * No missing citations

Prose Suggestions
Please note that all of these are suggestions, and can be implemented or ignored at your discretion.

Comment
Are you going to do this GA review or not as this hasn't been touched since the start. Not Homura (talk) 00:30, 22 September 2018 (UTC)
 * I'm planning to; I've been busy recently and I'll get around to it as soon as I can. Iazyges   Consermonor   Opus meum  16:36, 22 September 2018 (UTC)


 * Pinging (nominator) and others,  and . I will take over the review. Stay put. MX (  ✉  •  ✎  ) 18:35, 14 October 2018 (UTC)

Review
The article meets all GA criterias. Below are a few suggestions / issues needed to be addressed before passing the article. Great job! MX ( ✉  •  ✎  ) 23:46, 14 October 2018 (UTC)

Lead paragraph

 * – This is found here and in the infobox, but not cited anywhere. Anything in the lead/infobox needed to be mentioned and cited elsewhere in the body paragraphs, per WP:LEADCITE and WP:INFOBOXCITE. I would recommend adding the full name somewhere in the first paragraph of the Life and education section, and then introduce the fact that she went as Rose C. Davison.
 * Done.KAVEBEAR (talk) 16:18, 20 October 2018 (UTC)


 * – Does the "part Native Hawaiian" claim come from the fact that her father was American and her mother was British-Hawaiian? If she was born in the Kingdom of Hawaii, she shouldn't be called part Native Hawaiian. She's full Hawaiian. Maybe I have it wrong, though, so please correct me. There is no mention of this in the body paragraphs (aside from her advisors being "part-Hawaiian", but that doesn't mean she was one, too).
 * Native Hawaiian and being born in Hawaii are not the same. Her mother was ethnically part Native Hawaiian so she was part Native Hawaiian. KAVEBEAR (talk) 23:58, 14 October 2018 (UTC)

Life and education

 * – This is a comment in regards to the name of the section. First, this is a biography, so we know this is article is about her "life". "Life" doesn't tell us much. You might want to break down this section into multiple sections, like "Early life and education" and "Career", etc.
 * Done.KAVEBEAR (talk) 16:15, 20 October 2018 (UTC)


 * – Why is the name shortened here but not in the infobox?
 * Taylor was her married name. All her sisters married name are not included in this paragraph.KAVEBEAR (talk) 00:01, 15 October 2018 (UTC)


 * – More of a strong suggestion here, but I don't think it is very useful to have three citations at the end of a large paragraph when we can probably spread them out appropriately. It is hard for readers to know which of the three sources backs up each sentence. Per WP:PAIC, "The ref tags should immediately follow the text to which the footnote applies".
 * All the sources listed are summaries of her life.KAVEBEAR (talk) 16:15, 20 October 2018 (UTC)


 * – link hula
 * Done.KAVEBEAR (talk) 16:15, 20 October 2018 (UTC)


 * – What's the discrepancy with the dates? Have you considered adding a footnote to explain why it is either 1907 or 1909, or what sources use the different dates?


 * Found this source you might find useful. She was a descendent of Liloa.
 * Already in existing sources. Didn’t want to go too in depth about distant genealogy.KAVEBEAR (talk) 16:15, 20 October 2018 (UTC)

Illness and death

 * – Died so young... any sources mention what caused her death?
 * Nothing in the sources describe her illness.


 * – link California
 * Done.KAVEBEAR (talk) 16:03, 20 October 2018 (UTC)


 * – Link Oahu
 * Done.KAVEBEAR (talk) 16:03, 20 October 2018 (UTC)

Categories

 * Two possible suggestions here. Either Women philanthropists or Kingdom of Hawaii philantrophist, though I think that by the time she became involved in philantrophy, it was already Territory of Hawaii. Please add whichever you think is correct.
 * Added American women philanthropist.KAVEBEAR (talk) 16:20, 20 October 2018 (UTC)


 * Thank you for some of the responses. Let me know when you're done by pinging me here. MX ( ✉  •  ✎  ) 18:32, 15 October 2018 (UTC)
 * Addressed all points.KAVEBEAR (talk) 16:20, 20 October 2018 (UTC)


 * All points have been addressed. Passing GA! MX ( ✉  •  ✎  ) 15:50, 22 October 2018 (UTC)