Talk:Rose Tico/GA1

GA Review
The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.''

Reviewer: Adamstom.97 (talk · contribs) 23:54, 23 November 2019 (UTC)

Hey there, I am going to take this one for review. Will be back with comments shortly. - adamstom97 (talk) 23:54, 23 November 2019 (UTC)

Issues
This is a great article and I think it is close to GA standard. Generally well-written, good coverage, images/media seem fine. I just have a few things that I would like to see addressed before I am happy to promote the article. Have a go at the following and let me know if there are any concerns. - adamstom97 (talk) 01:13, 24 November 2019 (UTC)

Lead & infobox

 * I think we should give the full title of the film on its first use in the infobox (which is the image caption in this instance).
 * Agreed. — Hunter Kahn 04:31, 24 November 2019 (UTC)
 * As has already been discussed at the talk page, the "voiced by" credit is unnecessary here since "portrayed by" already covers it. Perhaps a hidden note is required to reinforce that these are not both needed?
 * Done. — Hunter Kahn 04:31, 24 November 2019 (UTC)
 * Also potential unnecessary duplication with "Resistance Maintenance Worker" and "Resistance" beside each other. I think just "Maintenance Worker" as occupation and "Resistance" as affiliation would cover the same ground.
 * I agree. Changed. — <b style="color:#C0C0C0">Hun</b><b style="color:#C0C0C0">ter</b> <b style="color:#595454">Ka</b><b style="color:#595454">hn</b> 04:31, 24 November 2019 (UTC)
 * I think the sentence about Abrams is too much weight on his statement for the lead, since it is such a small part of the article and especially since the whole quote is given here. My suggestion would be to remove the entire sentence and just let the quote speak for itself in the body.
 * I really like it for the lead because I think it's a very bold statement by
 * The last sentence of the third paragraph seems a little tricky to follow for me. May I suggest something along the lines of "Johnson originally planned for Rose to be sarcastic and irritable, but the character was changed to match Tran's personality after she was cast, becoming more positive."?
 * Are we able to remove the sources from the lead since the content is sourced in the body? Or are those points still controversial?
 * I normally don't include citations in the lead, but it struck me as appropriate in this case since the character has been the subject of controversy and racist attacks. I want it to be clear that these statements are not subjective, but rather verifiable facts. If you strongly feel the citations should be removed, though, let me know... — <b style="color:#C0C0C0">Hun</b><b style="color:#C0C0C0">ter</b> <b style="color:#595454">Ka</b><b style="color:#595454">hn</b> 04:31, 24 November 2019 (UTC)

Character biography & Characterization

 * Can we introduce Johnson at the start of this section like Wein? I wouldn't assume that users have read the lead before starting at this point.
 * Good call. Changed. — <b style="color:#C0C0C0">Hun</b><b style="color:#C0C0C0">ter</b> <b style="color:#595454">Ka</b><b style="color:#595454">hn</b> 04:31, 24 November 2019 (UTC)
 * "Despite her lack of formal training, she ..." Can we clarify that this is Rose, and not her sister?
 * Yup. — <b style="color:#C0C0C0">Hun</b><b style="color:#C0C0C0">ter</b> <b style="color:#595454">Ka</b><b style="color:#595454">hn</b> 04:31, 24 November 2019 (UTC)
 * "With help from Resistance pilot ..." This sentence implies that BB-8 doesn't go with them, and when this is contradicted later on there could be confusion that Poe is actually with them as well. I would just say that Finn, Rose, and BB-8 go, and leave Poe out of it.
 * Made the change (please take a look to make sure I did it the way you envisoned) and also switched the context and wikilink to the new first mention of Poe Dameron in the "Other Star Wars media" section. — <b style="color:#C0C0C0">Hun</b><b style="color:#C0C0C0">ter</b> <b style="color:#595454">Ka</b><b style="color:#595454">hn</b> 04:31, 24 November 2019 (UTC)
 * "boardED"
 * Oops. lol Fixed. — <b style="color:#C0C0C0">Hun</b><b style="color:#C0C0C0">ter</b> <b style="color:#595454">Ka</b><b style="color:#595454">hn</b> 04:31, 24 November 2019 (UTC)
 * "The final scene ..." Doesn't have much to do with Rose.
 * My logic for including it was that it showed Rose's actions had an impact on the kids and the future as reflected in this scene... but after looking back on it now I agree with you that it's not necessary. Removed. — <b style="color:#C0C0C0">Hun</b><b style="color:#C0C0C0">ter</b> <b style="color:#595454">Ka</b><b style="color:#595454">hn</b> 04:31, 24 November 2019 (UTC)
 * "carry own after her sister was gone"
 * Fixed, changed to "carry on". — <b style="color:#C0C0C0">Hun</b><b style="color:#C0C0C0">ter</b> <b style="color:#595454">Ka</b><b style="color:#595454">hn</b> 04:31, 24 November 2019 (UTC)
 * In general for these sections the tense needs to be adjusted to make sure it is in line with WP:FICTENSE. At the moment it sounds more like a eulogy than discussion of a character.
 * I changed it to present tense where it felt appropriate; let me know if I missed any instances. — <b style="color:#C0C0C0">Hun</b><b style="color:#C0C0C0">ter</b> <b style="color:#595454">Ka</b><b style="color:#595454">hn</b> 04:31, 24 November 2019 (UTC)

Concept and creation

 * "This led him to conceive the Rose Tico character ..." Can you clarify the quote to make it clear that he is talking about Finn?
 * Done; let me know if the adjustment I made works. — <b style="color:#C0C0C0">Hun</b><b style="color:#C0C0C0">ter</b> <b style="color:#595454">Ka</b><b style="color:#595454">hn</b> 04:31, 24 November 2019 (UTC)
 * "were in the original The Last Jedi scripts were either eliminated or revised"
 * Dropped the word "were". — <b style="color:#C0C0C0">Hun</b><b style="color:#C0C0C0">ter</b> <b style="color:#595454">Ka</b><b style="color:#595454">hn</b> 04:31, 24 November 2019 (UTC)
 * "Dialogue that involved Rose chastising Finn for being too emotionally attached to Rey." This sentence is missing some connective tissue.
 * Corrected this. — <b style="color:#C0C0C0">Hun</b><b style="color:#C0C0C0">ter</b> <b style="color:#595454">Ka</b><b style="color:#595454">hn</b> 04:31, 24 November 2019 (UTC)
 * "Baldari said her animation" This is confusing since you aren't talking about an animated series here (the source also doesn't support "animation" over a more appropriate term such as "illustrations" or even "designs").
 * Good catch. Changed to "illustrations". — <b style="color:#C0C0C0">Hun</b><b style="color:#C0C0C0">ter</b> <b style="color:#595454">Ka</b><b style="color:#595454">hn</b> 04:31, 24 November 2019 (UTC)
 * The Casting and Filming sections both feature quite a lot of quotes. I don't have any specific ones that I think should be removed, I would just like to see a general c/e to try turn some of them into paraphrased prose or be removed if they are not necessary.
 * I've paraphrased a few of the quotes based on this feedback, and would be open to doing more if you think it necessary... — <b style="color:#C0C0C0">Hun</b><b style="color:#C0C0C0">ter</b> <b style="color:#595454">Ka</b><b style="color:#595454">hn</b> 04:31, 24 November 2019 (UTC)

Reception

 * "In less than one day, more than 20,000 fans retweeted a message of support ..." A message from who?
 * I added the general "from a fan" descriptor because I don't really feel the identity of the person in this particular case is important. Though if you want the exact name in there I can add "from writer Suzie Sainwood". — <b style="color:#C0C0C0">Hun</b><b style="color:#C0C0C0">ter</b> <b style="color:#595454">Ka</b><b style="color:#595454">hn</b> 04:31, 24 November 2019 (UTC)
 * It may be worth adding some newer developments regarding the Episode 9 marketing (she was not included with the main cast when character posters were released, but was added later).
 * Added this, and also a quote from Tran about her role in The Rise of Skywalker. — <b style="color:#C0C0C0">Hun</b><b style="color:#C0C0C0">ter</b> <b style="color:#595454">Ka</b><b style="color:#595454">hn</b> 04:31, 24 November 2019 (UTC)
 * The Critical Reception section also has a lot of quotes in it. I realise that this is mostly due to the nature of the section, but I think some effort should be made to having this be less quote heavy.
 * I've gone through and scaled back the use of direct quotes here as well. — <b style="color:#C0C0C0">Hun</b><b style="color:#C0C0C0">ter</b> <b style="color:#595454">Ka</b><b style="color:#595454">hn</b> 04:31, 24 November 2019 (UTC)

Result
Thanks for all those quick responses to my points! That's cleaned up the mistakes I found in the article, and improved a couple places as well. I understand your argument regarding the references, even if it looks a bit strange to me (I'm just not used to seeing so many triple-ups of citations). Great job with the article, I am happy to give it a pass - adamstom97 (talk) 04:45, 24 November 2019 (UTC)