Talk:SMS Audio

Request Edit
I've been helping SMS Audio and their PR agency improve their Wikipedia page and I would like to request feedback on our draft. I worded the lead such that the article is on the product brand, rather than the company, due to the weight of sourcing and the article. I also suggested we not try to write our own Reception section with a COI, that being somewhat like writing your own product review. I'll be able to fix the images soon, and would be comfortable doing that as a non-controversial edit. Corporate Minion 22:29, 21 September 2012 (UTC)
 * I just checked the page. Looks good so far. When will you move it to the SMS Audio page? SrGangsta (talk) 15:04, 22 September 2012 (UTC)


 * Late yesterday I asked them for a logo on a transparent background and permission for the product image. That along with any final last-minute tweaks should be wrapped up this coming week. Other than that, just whenever an impartial editor like yourself signs off on it. My approach to COI is that I voluntarily leave all final content decisions in the hands of impartial volunteers. Corporate Minion 17:06, 22 September 2012 (UTC)


 * Hm, ok, I dig it. How can I sign off on it? And I am a little confused with what "COI" means... Ha, help me with that. As soon you get the permission of the image, hit me up in my talk page. SrGangsta (talk) 23:23, 22 September 2012 (UTC)


 * WP:COI = "conflict of interest." Because my contributions are on behalf of the subject of the article, I have a potential conflict of interest, because companies are sometimes motivated to make edits that are a dis-service to Wikipedia and its readers, such as through censorship, advertising or spin.


 * Some PR professionals that contribute to Wikipedia on behalf of their clients ethically, voluntarily subject our contributions to scrutiny up-front, so they may be reviewed by an impartial editor with only the reader's interest in mind.


 * If you feel the proposed re-write is neutral, valuable to the reader and does not remove negative information from the current article, you can replace the "R" with a "G" in the template at the top of this Talk page string to give the go-ahead. Alternatively, it is also your option to move it into article-space directly, or decline and offer feedback.


 * Hope this helps! Corporate Minion 00:47, 23 September 2012 (UTC)

Uncertain usage right of headphone photo
The edits by the user User:Corporate Minion who uploaded the photo would not confirm that photos have been approved for fair use requirements guideline of Wikimedia Foundation. On his own user page, he affirms that he's a COI editor. Removed until usage permission is verified positively. Cantaloupe2 (talk) 04:39, 10 October 2012 (UTC)
 * Please click on the image, scroll down a little, and look at the box with the bright blue outline. The owner has given permission for its use, and it is perfectly acceptable to use it.  -- No  unique  names  16:53, 11 October 2012 (UTC)
 * Good job on the tweaks to the Product section though - it is much more neutral now. Corporate 17:40, 11 October 2012 (UTC)

Company history
The foundation date was vague with "late 2011". I located references, but I'm not sure how to put them in proper format. I left them in raw form in history section for someone else to put it in proper form.. Cantaloupe2 (talk) 17:35, 12 October 2012 (UTC)

Response to contest by Corporate Minion on products offered
A link to company's official page showing list of their products should be a good proof of current product offering. I actually had it cited in-line in products section. You stripped it. Which is hereCantaloupe2 (talk) 02:45, 23 October 2012 (UTC)

Update/improvement
I started this article, where I have a COI, back in October 2012. It has gotten very out-of-date and has some trivial or promotional information I think could be trimmed.

My proposed draft at User:CorporateM/SMS Audio is approximately the same length, but trims a lot of trivial information and adds new updates from the last 1.5 years, in addition to extensive copyediting.

I know it can be hard to compare the two versions when the article is reasonably well developed, but also know of no easier way when a lot of edits are necessary.

Was hoping an impartial editor would take a look. CorporateM (Talk) 23:06, 20 February 2014 (UTC)


 * You do good work as always. A couple of thoughts.  The product descriptions seem to lean towards using their advertising "unique" points to describe them rather than how a disinterested party might describe them. Same for saying just "sweat proof" instead of saying what that is.   Sincerely,  North8000  (talk) 22:54, 27 February 2014 (UTC)


 * I think I see what you mean. Is that better? CorporateM (Talk) 23:31, 27 February 2014 (UTC)


 * Yes. BTW, whatever quality/feature the subject headphones have / are purported to have in relation to "sweat-proof" IMO is fine to cover, but IMO not with using the words of their advertising claim in the voice of Wikipedia. North8000  (talk) 20:19, 28 February 2014 (UTC)

Per WP:COI, I'd like to request an impartial editor merge my proposed draft at User:CorporateM/SMS Audio (discussed above and a bit more with user:North8000 here) into the current article. CorporateM (Talk) 05:00, 1 March 2014 (UTC)

Recent edits
Some recent edits have been made that rely heavily on primary or weak sources to create an indiscriminate list of sponsors and make some misleading product claims that are not supported by the citation. For example, the article says SMS Audio's new BioSport In-Ear earbuds "is currently the only audio earbud that accurately measures heart rate and does not require a battery" whereas the source makes no claims about the product's efficacy and rattles off a list of other wearable heart-rate-monitoring devices.

My suggestion would be to revert these edits, then re-incorporate the verge with a breif "In August 2014, SMS Audio announced the BioSport In-Ear wired earbuds that montior the user's heart-rate." just after "in partnership with LucasFilm.[16]" in the Product section. CorporateM (Talk) 00:33, 12 January 2015 (UTC)


 * Perhaps these tweets could be used for the second and last: 1, 2; they are verifiable in line with WP:TWITTER and WP:Twitter. This should also serve as further reference: http://www.cnbc.com/id/101338662. I think the nascar.com link can be trusted and kept for the third sponsor, as well as reference no.21. This article contains reference to the first and fourth sponsors, and could be used as reference for your other edit suggested above. This article can be used as reference for the fifth sponsor. I'll implement these edits, along with your suggested edit above for the claim. SamWilson989 (talk) 02:05, 12 January 2015 (UTC)

Second request edit
There is currently a lot of redundancy between the "Partners and Sponsors" section and other sections of the article. I'd like to suggest removing this section through a mix of removing redundancies, merging to other sections, etc.


 * Carmelo Anthony is already mentioned under "Products" and can be trimmed. Swan Racing is already mentioned under "Sponsorships" and can be trimmed. I think Alana Blanchard can also be trimmed for now, because the source only briefly mentions it in passing.
 * The source provided says Timbaland is an investor, not a sponsor. I suggest changing "Origins" to "History" and putting his investment there.
 * I'd also like to merge DJ Pauly D. and Rob Gronkowski to the Sponsorships section.
 * Many of the sponsors have press releases or tweets cited in addition to rap music trade publications. I'd like to trim these to just the stronger sources.

This is a lot of very mundane and tedious work. If you support the edits, please feel free to give me a Request Edit|G, and I'll perform the actual editing if my suggested changes are approved. CorporateM (Talk) 21:00, 28 January 2015 (UTC)
 * Feel free. — Crisco 1492 (talk) 15:33, 10 March 2015 (UTC)
 * ✅ I ended up moving some things to different places, but since I'm actually making the page less promotional in this case, doesn't seem like there should be a problem. CorporateM (Talk) 15:43, 10 March 2015 (UTC)